EXCERPTS FROM READERS of the Golden Washboards-

1.Robert Shulkin,(Del Mar, Ca).."truly enjoyed all of it, I know this collection of family history means a lot to those of us old enough to remember so many of our Weiss relatives and I am certain in years to come that it will also be cherished by the younbger (and to be born) members of our family.

2. Nikki Beller (Yardley, Pa )"...just received your book and can't begin to tell you how thrilled I am......it is more than an autobiography of our family, but a historical picture of the times. The photos are so touching. Thank you so much for putting together and sharing with us this treasure."


3.Nedra Fetterman (Bryn Mawr, Pa.)"...it is truly beautiful and a wonderful treasure to save and savor. ...the letters from Mina Benn are very touching and priceless.

4. Shelley Reibstein (Philadelphia)"...I received your book and can't thank you enough for for sending it to me............you are so kind and caring"


The folowing cCORRECTIONS have been submitted since publication of the Golden Washboards:
1. Mona Weis (Los Angeles. ) submits that on page 146 the name McGinnis should be Mcmannis.
2. Jennifer Shulkin submits that she is named after her paternal great grandmother not her maternal great grandmother.

3. Rona Gahr (Milwaukee) submits that Jacob Weis died 4/16/62 not in 1957.









THE GOLDEN WASHBOARDS



by


Mina and Etta Benn


Edited by Mark Weiss Shulkin




















PREFACE

System theorist and psycho-analyst Murray Bowen writes about forces within families pulling people toward togetherness and also pushing them toward separateness and independence. According to Bowen, when the balance of those forces is disturbed, the dysfunction and/or strengths resulting, influences their children and continuing generations. (Bowen, M, Toward the Differentiation of Self in One’s Family, in Family Interaction: A dialogue between family researchers and family therapists, James Framo editor, pp 111-178, Northvale NJ, 1989.) Reading Etta’s experience of family lost and family found during her adolescence details that push-pull Bowen refers to.

I resonate with Bowen in my belief that I’ve inherited both dysfunction and strengths from two sets of grandparents whose flights from persecution in Russia to become “foreigners” in America left scars that couldn’t heal in just a generation or two. There’s a psychic reward in reading Mina’s manuscript. Coming to consciousness about one’s dysfunctions and one’s strengths is the first step in adapting to them. That’s why I’m so pleased to share the family history with you on this 100th year anniversary of Aunt Etta’s immigration.

It’s unabridged except for occasional polishing of punctuation and paragraphing. Mina’s unaffected writing style allows Etta’s youthful personality to come through. I can almost hear Etta’s impish voice, and recognize the soothing traces of her Yiddishe accent.

Mina was an extraordinary relative. She was the self appointed family archivist. Keeping in touch was her lifelong thing. She frequently visited the family in Milwaukee and in New Orleans. She seldom missed a wedding or a Bar Mitzvah anywhere in the country. She faithfully dispersed news about family events with letters and phone calls between visits. Never married, she loved her extended family as if they were the children she never had. She was a gift to all of us.

In 2000 when she was no longer able to speak because of a fatal throat cancer, she wrote to me and to others to say goodbye. I’ll share my letters with you at the end of this book. I can’t think of a better way to describe the person Mina was but to let her speak for herself.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

1. Introduction………………………………………………..6
2. The Golden Washboard
Chapter
1. The Golden Washboard………………………10
2. Hide your Shoes………………………………13
3. The Dowry
4. The Courtship
5. The Landlady…………………………………50
6. The Boarders
7. Joys and Sorrows
8. Steinberg’s Farm
9. Bailey Street
10. Citizen of the USA

3. Family History Related by Great Aunt Mary
4. The Genealogy
5. Letters from Mina Benn
6. A Yiddish Glossary
7. Acknowledgements




















INTRODUCTION

During the Crusades, less than a century shy of a thousand years ago, the Jews began their migration north from Palestine to Spain, Portugal and Western Europe. The Holy Inquisition dispersed them west and north during the Fifteenth Century.

Columbus had not yet discovered America so they found asylum in Poland. It was one of the last countries to be Christianized and it became a center of Jewish culture. The Polish Kings welcomed the commerce the Jews brought as well as their skills in administering the nobilities’ feudal estates, collecting taxes and high rents from the peasants. The Jews thrived until the peasants finally rebelled and blamed the Jews instead of the nobles.

With the unification of all the Russias, the Czar’s pride in becoming a world power led to Russia conquering Poland and becoming the custodian of its Jewish communities whose culture was strange to them. Histrionic theories and fears of revolution threatened the Russian Royal family into intensifying Jewish isolation and persecution.
BEYOND THE PALE
In 1791, the Pale of Settlement was created by Catherine III. It restricted Jewish residence to either the territories annexed from Poland along the western border or to the territories taken from the Turks along the shores of the Black Sea. It was an unreasonable plan to “rehabilitate” Jews into an agricultural society with which they had no experience or interest.

ASSIMILATION BY MILITARY CONSCRIPTION
During the Reign of Nicholas I, Jewish life deteriorated severely. Jews were conscripted into military service for periods of no less than 25 years. Jewish community draft boards were responsible for quotas of recruits aged 12 to 25. Children were kidnapped to fill the quotas and then re-educated in order to be converted to Christianity. During 29 years of this program 30-40,000 children were abducted.
THE REIGN OF ALEXANDER II
Things were better for the Jews in 1861 when Alexander the II emancipated the serfs bringing positive changes to Russian society generally. The draft was repealed and small groups of Jews were allowed outside the Pale where they were merchants, artisans and doctors. Jews became part of the general society working in the professions, banking and export trades. But the sudden existence of Jewish lawyers and journalists and entrepreneurs frightened the Russians. In 1863 the Jews suffered a major setback. They were accused of being a state within the state dedicated to dominating Russia.

The Jews were blamed for the murder of Alexander II in 1881 and an unstable Russian government encouraged the scapegoating and persecution of its Jewish citizens. This was the time of Rasputin, a faith healer to the Czar who very effectively promoted anti-Semitism.

There were more than 200 pogroms sanctioned by the government in 1881 alone. The Cossacks believed they were serving the Czar in their killing of Jews and a government commission studying pogroms agreed with them and found that the Jews were the cause of the pogroms.

Leaving Russia was not easily done. Even if one had the money for passage to America, one needed immigration papers that would not be issued if there were unpaid taxes or potential military obligations. Bribing Russian officials was a common part of leaving officially.

Mark Weiss Shulkiin




Etta and Abe Benn in July 1954
Chapter One
E GOLDEN WASIIBOARDS


My mother was reminiscing about her experiences of her trip from Russia to the United States in the year of 1907.
I said,
“Mother what made you decide to come to this country?”
She thought a moment and said,
“I guess it all started with the golden washboards.”

We all laughed and urged her to tell the whole story.
“I was sixteen years old and lived with my father and mother, five sisters and. one brother in a small village about fifteen miles east of the city of Kiev. We were under the rule of the Czar Nicholas I and people were not permitted to travel from one place to another without a permit. There was even a quota system set up for the number of people permitted to 1eave a small village and seek work in the large cities. Very few girls or even men were able to better themselves financially by seek­ing work outside their villages. As a result of this harsh rule many young people started to emigrate to America. We also had the iron curtain at that time, but like the people today, people risked their lives and left Russia. But wait, I am getting ahead of myself. That’s another story.

In our village there was this plump dark haired girl. I recall her name was Miriam. She had an aunt and uncle who lived in Brooklyn, New York. Miriam wrote and asked if they would send her a ship’s ticket to come to the United States so she could earn some money as a seamstress.


Miriam came from a large family of girls and. there was very little money for her dowry. She realized without a substantial dowry, her chance for picking a mate of her choice was null. Her aunt sent Miriam the fifty dollars necessary to buy her ticket and she legally left Russia. She worked in New York City for four years and when she accumulated four hundred dollars she returned home. All the women in the village were talking about Miriam’s large dowry and her beautiful clothes. She even had five pairs of shoes. The matchmakers were intro­ducing her to the very best looking young men.

0, she was not only envied but respected as well and to think she was only the daughter of a poor tailor.


I knew all about Miriam, she being the main topic of conver­sation but I still didn’t feel the desire to leave my home.

It was a beautiful summer’s day and I was sitting under an apple tree embroidering a cloth for my sister Evelyn’s hope chest when Rachel my youngest sister came running towards me.
“Come quickly”, she said, “You must go down to the river, All the women are watching Miriam and her sisters wash their clothes on their golden washboards.”

I thought what in the world is she talking about? We all washed our clothes in the river by slapping them against the stones. I couldn’t imagine what a washboard looked like. I hurried to the river with Rachel and there gathered around Miriam and her sisters were most of the women of the village watching in awed silence.

The sun was shining brightly and I realized the boards gleaning against the stones were not gold but brass. But the ease in which the girls washed the clothes clean so quickly made me long to possess one. Miriam and her sisters graciously let the women one by one wash an article of their clothes on the four wash boards. I, too, timidly asked to try it. 0, the wonder of it. The wonderful inventions they must have in the United States. I guess it was at that moment that I decided that I, too, must earn the fifty dollars to sail to America.

I, like Miriam, would bring back all those wonderful gifts for my mother and sisters and aunts. So I began my dreaming and planning to get to the land that possessed all those golden looking washboards.
Chapter Two
HIDE YOUR SHOES
Bessie was my best friend. We discussed our dreams of sail­ing to America. Bessie had an uncle who lived in the city of Kiev. He was a wealthy man in accordance with the standards of that time and place. He lived with his wife and three daughters in a large home and had about a dozen women working for him in his shop which clothed the wealthy women of Kiev. He was always interested in employing young girls who were fine seamstresses.

Unfortunately, he could not legally em­ploy girls from the nearby villages because so few could obtain a work permit. Like many other employers of those times he secretly had a few girls live in his home and they worked without permits. Periodically the police came un­expectedly and searched these premises. If the workers were discovered the boss had to pay a heavy fine and the women were forced to leave the city and as a punishment they had to hike home accompanied by a policeman. They were not per­mitted to rest, and sometimes had to hike fifteen miles. They were not only exhausted but held in contempt by the people of the village. In spite of this many girls like my­self took the chance so we could earn enough money to emigrate to America.

I begged Bessie to introduce me to her uncle the next time he and his family came for a visit.

I remember it was a beautiful day in September and Bessie came running towards me.
“Etta Etta,” she cried, “My uncle is coming this afternoon for a two day visit. I I cannot ask him to employ you, my mother forbids it, but wear the dress you made for yourself for the high holidays and come to my house. Mother does not permit uncle to smoke his pipe in our house so he always goes outside to smoke. You must find the opportunity to show him how well you can sew and ask him for a job. That is all I can do for you.”

I ran home and, washed my face until it shown rosy red and I brushed my long auburn hair until my arms ached. I pinned my hair up high on my head. and tried to look older. I put on my new shoes and the dress I had made. It was a
bright blue wool, with a large white collar. It hugged my waist line and fell gracefully down to my ankles. My mother came in from the orchard, and she was surprised to see me dressed in my Sabbath clothes. I told her I was invited to Bessie’s home to meet her uncle Max. I hoped he would give me a job and then I could earn enough money to leave for America. Mother knew of my plans and although she in secret approved of my desire to leave Russia, she was also apprehensive of the troubles I might get into. She sadly gave her consent but wished that I were like her two older daughters who were content to stay home and wait until the matchmaker found suitable husbands for them.

I hurried, to Bessie’s house and as I approached I saw the magnificent horses and the beautiful black carriage stand­ing in front of the house. I knew her Uncle 1&ax had arrived and I timidly knocked at the door and went in. Bessie intro­duced me to her aunt and. uncle and cousins. Uncle Max was a tall thin man with jet black curly hair, steel-blue eyes and a rat-tail mustache with a short Van Dyke beard. He was neatly dressed in a black suit with a large gold watch and chain across the front of his vest. His wife Anna was short and plump. Her blonde hair was pulled straight up with a large bun on the top of her head. She was dressed in a dark brown silk dress, in the latest of fashion with the apron on the front and. the bustle in the back. She had a rope of small pearls encircling her throat. Her daughters ranging from fifteen to eighteen years of age looked like their mother and they were gay and charming. I liked the family immediately and tried to hide my shyness as I realized that I had to make a good impression on them. Uncle Max did not go out to smoke his pipe. I became anxious for fear that I would lose the opportunity to speak to him in private. Bessie sensed my anxiety and. said to her uncle,
“Uncle Max, I wish you would smoke your pipe so I could smell the delicious aroma.”
Uncle Max smiled, rose, stretched and said, “I guess I would enjoy a smoke now.” He went outside and Bessie and I followed him into the garden.

Bessie shoved me forward and said,
“Uncle Max, Etta wants to ask you a favor.”
I felt myself blushing but to my amazement found myself telling Uncle Max of my desire to earn the money to go to America, what a fine seamstress I was, and how hard I would work for him if he only gave me the chance.

Uncle Max looked at the dress I was wearing and asked if I had designed and made it. I replied yes. I could see he was impressed. He also wanted to know if I could obtain a work permit. I sadly told him no. There were too many people on the list and I would have to wait years before I could get approval to leave. Uncle Max said,
“Do you realize what will happen if you get caught?”
I said,
”Yes, but I was willing to chance it if he was.”
He thought a moment and. said,
“If your parents consent I will take you along as a guest in my home.”

I ran home joyfully. Now to get father to consent to my going. Around the dinner table I spoke of Bessie’s family coming for a visit, their fine clothes and what wonderful people they were and howl longed to accept their invitation to visit with them. To my surprise father quietly agreed to my going. I looked into his eyes and. saw how sad, they were. I real­ized that mother must have spoken to him and convinced him to let me go and seek my fortune. I also realized he was worried about the dowries he had to provide for six daughters and perhaps I could help in this way.

Bessie came over in the evening and. helped me pack my few belongings. My sisters tearfully crowded around me and the little ones pleaded with me not to go.

The next afternoon I left for Kiev and it was the first time that I rode in such a magnificent carriage. I felt like a prin­cess. The girls sang and chatted and called me their cousin.

Uncle Max suddenly asked me how many pairs of shoes I had brought with me. I answered in surprise two pairs, one pair for daily use and one and pair for the Sabbath. My Uncle Max told me I must at all times keep the extra pairs of shoes at my side. He would also give me a canvas bag and at night when I went to bed I was to put both pairs of shoes into the bag and have them within easy reach in case I had to leave the room in a hurry. In case the police came to search his home he had a secret stairway leading from the third floor where the girls worked and slept to a secret room in the basement, and none of his girls were ever caught. He could always account for extra dresses, saying they belonged to his family or customers, but not shoes. The police always looked for shoes and compared shoe sizes with the families. I was impressed with the importance of hiding my shoes. We finally arrived in Kiev, and this was the first time I had ever been to a large city. The city was beautiful. The streets were paved with cobblestones and there were brick sidewalks.

Large stately homes faced a square filled with trees and flowers. I could see children running about as their mother’s or nurses sat on the benches. I became very excited when I saw a large vehicle riding on two ribbons of steel but not being pulled by horses. The girls laughed at my amazement and explained that this vehicle was celled a trolley and was powered by electricity. They told me some of the stores also had electric lights, but I would have to wait until nightfall before I could see them. I could hardly contain my excite­ment and kept turning my head from side to side and backwards drinking in all the new sights as one who landed from another planet.

We finally arrived at Uncle Max’s house. At first I was a little disappointed. It was on a side street and. did not face a square. The houses on the street were close together with small front yards surrounded by black iron fences. There was a side yard which served as an entrance way to the stable located at the rear of the garden. We left the carriage, walked up the steps and as the servant opened the front door I heard. Uncle Max say,
“Millie, we have brought another cousin home.”

I was impressed when I went inside the house. The girls showed me about. The first room off .the hallway overlooking the street was a large drawing room. It had a large red rug and. I could see the beautiful hardwood floors. A baby grand piano stood in one corner surrounded by large rubber plants.

Large pictures of the family in dark mahogany frames hung on the walls. A huge sofa and chairs of deep brown tufted leather and mahogany tables with china oil lamps upon then completed the furnishings. Gold curtains of heavy damask material hung over the two long windows facing the street. The dining room had a large oak sideboard with a large samovar, brass trays, and brass candle sticks on it. A large oak table with twelve tall oak chairs with brown leather seats surrounded the table and walls. The floor was highly polished and looked almost like black stone. A huge fireplace dominated one wall sur­rounded by windows on either side. The windows were draped in white lace curtains. The kitchen had a large brick built in oven. Long shelves surrounded the walls. I could see the dishes and the food stuffs piled high. The floor was made of red brick and in the center stood a large heavy wooden table with six small sturdy chairs. Two large water barrels stood in one corner. Even in this wealthy home running water had not yet been installed. This house to my disappointment did not have electric lights. It was lit by kerosene lamps the kind we had at home, only larger.

I could smell the cabbage and. meat cooking as I saw two young and one older servant preparing the meal and I suddenly became very hungry.

Anna said,
“Come my child., I want you to meet the other cousins. These are the girls with whom you will work and share the third floor as sleeping quarters.”

I ran quickly up the three flights of steps and Anna followed slowly pausing at each landing to catch her breath. At the top of the stairs there was a heavy oak door and to my sur­prise I found it locked. Anna came up the stairs and called,
“Dora, it’s Anna. Open the door.”
I heard the bolt pull back and was greeted by a girl about my own age. She said,
“Anna, how nice of you to bring us another cousin.”
The door opened wider and as I entered I saw three other girls sewing on beautiful silks around a large table in the middle of the room. There were two large windows facing the front of the house which were draped in thin lace curtains and three smaller windows facing the back of the house draped with thin cotton curtains. Two large double brass beds and one single wooden bed were against one wall in dormitory style. One wall had two large ugly black wooden wardrobes. The wooden floor was bare.

This room was to be my workshop and home for the next twelve months. Rose who opened the door and was my own age became my friend. We shared one of the big brass beds. Mary, Dora, and Jenny were older by as much as three and four years. They were kind to us and showed us how to do our work but in the evenings they went out by themselves and came home late. We could hear them whispering and laughing. Anna did not permit us to go out alone. She knew we could not be kept in our room so she permitted us to go out with her servant Millie.

We walked along the main streets, looked in the shop windows with all the beautiful displays of dresses, coats, hats, furs and. jewelry. Occasionally we stopped at a vendor’s cart to buy a sweet or cookies, but not often because the sweets cost a penny and when one earned three dollars per week, each penny had to be hoarded. There was also an outdoor movie in the amusement park and sometimes there were roving actors who put on dramas, wonderful puppet shows and circus acts. The entrance fee to the park was ten cents and this was one extravagance I indulged myself in. It was these evening outings that made working at the sewing table ten hours a day bearable. We worked five and one half days a week. On Friday afternoon I left Kiev to return by boat to my village. I stayed there until Sunday morning and took the boat back to the city. The boat ride, two hours long, cost ten cents.

I looked forward to coming home each week. It was a necessity too. I made myself very visible in the village. I made sure the Commissar or his wife saw me as I walked past his home. I was afraid if I were not seen for any length of time he would get suspicious and question my neighbors.

My friends would come to my home and listen in wonder to the tales I would tell about the great city, the plays, and the store window displays with the electric lights.

Almost one year had passed and I had saved the large sum of one hundred and thirty dollars. I was thinking of leaving Kiev when I passed the fur shop and my eyes fell upon a beautiful pair of matched stone martins.

I must have lost my head because I went in to price them and before I knew what happened I purchased the furs. I ran back to the house retrieved my money from the strong box under my bed and went to the fur store. I felt intoxicated with joy as I held the large white box under my arms. The Sabbath finally came and. I proudly put on my furs and headed for home. Never will I forget the glances of envy my friends cast on my furs. I felt like a queen coming home. My old­est sister Evelyn timidly asked me if she could wear the furs just once when she went to meet her young man. I didn’t have the heart to say no, so I put my beautiful furs around her shoulders. She looked so happy and beautiful that it brought tears to my eyes. Right there and then I decided to give them to her as a gift for her trousseau.

The furs were my undoing. The women in the village kept silent about my working in Kiev but unfortunately they had to talk about my giving Evelyn the beautiful Stone Martins. The Comrnissar’s wife heard the gossip and told her husband. He came to our house one Sabbath morning and I remembered how frightened we were. He questioned me, and I admitted that I had worked in the city for a short time but refused to give him the name of my employer. The Cornmissar, fortunately for me, was not a cruel man but he warned me that if I ever tried to leave the village again to seek work he would personally see to it that I would be arrested and sent to Siberia.

I wasn’t too worried about going back to Kiev as I had already saved enough money to sail to America, but I hadn’t figured on having to help pay for Evelyn’s dowry.

Chapter Three
THE DOWRY

Evelyn was already twenty years old and not married. The match­makers always came around telling my father that they had a fine suitable man for Evelyn and not demanding much of a dowry. My sister the oldest of us six girls was very obedient to my parents in every respect but one. In the past year she steadfastly refused to be matched up.

I see her now, tall, well-shaped with dark brown hair hanging down the back of her head in a thick braid, enormous brown eyes fringed with heavy black lashes and. a pale complex­ion. She always walked with her shoulders thrown back and head held high, just like a noblewoman. It was well known in the village that Evelyn was an excellent housekeeper and a fine cook. My mother, in order to help my father support the family, had a small shop in the square about a mile from our home. She sold iron pots, pans, and crockery. My mother left after breakfast each morning and didn’t return until shortly before the supper hour. The responsibility of running the household and looking after the children fell to Evelyn at an early age. She ruled us with a firm but gentle hand and we all loved her.

In our village lived a wealthy grain merchant with his wife and one son, Joseph. They had the largest and finest house in the village. It was very big, with large windows and a beautiful front oak door. I remembered we were invited one day during a special holiday to partake of some refreshments in their home. Large area Persian rugs covered the hardwood floors in the living and dining rooms. The furniture was of the large heavy carved Italian renaissance period.. It was the first time I had been in such a wealthy home and I and my sisters never forgot the beauty of it.

Joseph was educated by private tutors in his home until he was thirteen years of age. After his Bar Mitzvah he was sent away to a private school in Moscow. It was rumored that his father paid a large sum to the headmaster of the school in a bribe in order to have his son admitted. Jewish boys were not permitted to enter the higher schools of learning. Only the wealthy parents, paying dearly, could send their sons to the high schools and colleges in Russia those days.

When Joseph was nineteen years of age, his father died suddenly and Joseph left school to come home and help his mother run the business.

He was a bright young man, well educated, with a warm person­ality. He won friends quickly and was successful in running the grain business. He traveled in the wheatlands of Russia buying and selling grains to the millers. He came home every few weeks. He and Evelyn had known each other since childhood but like most children took little notice of each other.

1t was during a summer holiday when Joseph was eighteen years old and Evelyn seventeen years of age that I guess their aware­ness of each other began. Joseph was friendly with my brother Jake and. the two of them use to go fishing, hiking, and. riding together. Evelyn would always try to join in their conver­sations and go down to the river when they were fishing and bring them cakes to eat.

When Joseph came home to run the family business be started to come around to our house often. I guess I too was aware that it wasn’t Jake’s company but Evelyn’s he was seek­ing. He brought her little gifts from the towns and cities he visited and soon it was rumored that they were in love. My father became apprehensive. He didn’t want Evelyn to be hurt. He liked Joseph well enough but realized that he could not provide the financial backing necessary to arrange such a marriage. He decided to speak to Joseph about his courtship and where it would lead to. To my father’s surprise, Joseph told him he did not expect him to pay a large dowry. In fact if it was up to him, he would take Evelyn without a penny. He loved her dearly and didn’t need the dowry money. He only wanted her as his wife. He told father to go ahead and make the arrangements for the wedding.

Father proudly told him that Evelyn would not come to him penniless. He would give him a sum of two hundred dollars plus a large supply of linens, dishes and a trousseau for Evelyn fit for a wealthy man’s wife.

They would not need furniture as they would move into Joseph’s and his mother’s home. Joseph told my father that he was go­ing on another business trip lasting approximately three months. He would tell his mother to meet with my parents in order to advise and. help with the wedding arrangements.

In those days a wedding lasted for almost a week. All the relatives came from far away places and they had to be housed and fed. Never will I forget the look of happiness on the faces of my parents and Evelyn and Joseph that day as they discussed the coming wedding.

My mother invited Mrs. Kohn to the next Friday night supper. All week long Evelyn and my sisters scrubbed, cleaned and polished the house. The windows with the white starched curtains shone like diamonds in the sun and the flower pots blooming with geraniums added a touch of color. You could see yourself in the highly polished dark wood furniture. The samovar and brass candle sticks shone like gold on the sideboard.

Our house was a cottage with white stucco walls, thatched roof and slate floors. There was also a garden in the front of the house brimming with flowers and shaded by large trees. Our orchard was located on the side of the house with a very large vegetable garden in the back. It did not compare with Mrs. Kohn’s house, but we were proud of our home and looked forward to Mrs. Kohn’s visit.

That Friday afternoon all of us went to the public bath house. When we came out I think we were the cleanest and sweetest smelling girls in all of Russia.

My mother came home early from the store and we all helped in preparing the Friday night meal. We were cooking the traditional Sabbath supper, gefilta fish, chicken noodle soup, chicken, potatoes and vegetables from our garden. Mother baked the challah bread and made delicious compote for desert. The sweet aroma of baking bread permeated the house.

Mrs. Cohn arrived in her fine brown horse and carriage. Jake immediately took the reins and tied them to a tree. My father helped her from the carriage and they entered the house.

Mrs. Kohn looked around the house and. complimented my mother on how clean and charming her home was. She also looked at each of us and said how fortunate my parents were to possess such a large and beautiful family. We sat down at the table, mother lit the candles and said the prayer. Father also said a prayer, broke the bread and we started to eat.
Only Father, mother, Mrs. Kohn and. Evelyn spoke. We had been told beforehand not to speak unless spoken to. After the meal mother and I cleared the table quickly. My sisters helped with washing of the dishes while father showed Mrs. Kohn around ­the garden and orchard.

When they returned we had already stacked the dishes in the cupboard, put away all the food stuffs and reset the table with cakes and fruits.

Mother put on her shawl, gathered up the smaller children and said she was going to visit her sister a short distance away in order to give her husband and Mrs. Kohn a chance to discuss the dowry in a quiet house. Evelyn and I retired to the bedroom and picked up our sewing basket. We left the door slightly ajar so that we could hear the conversation. We did very little sewing.

My father politely said,
“Perhaps it is God’s will that your son should marry my daughter.” My father told Mrs. Kohn of the dowry he was prepared to give. She was silent for what seemed to be a long time. Quietly she said,
“I cannot accept such a paltry sum for my son.”
My father keeping his voice under control asked what would she consider as a fair settlement. She said,
“I know you are not a wealthy man and have five other daughters to marry off, so I will be very lenient. I want five hundred dollars as a settlement and not one cent less. I want you to know that the house and business were left to me and if Joseph disobeys me and. marries against my wishes I will cut him off without a penny. He will have to seek his own living and provide a home for his wife.”

My father suddenly realized that this clever woman did not want her son to marry Evelyn. She was finding a way to prevent the marriage. He said,

“Mrs. Kohn I regret that I cannot raise the dowry. I have my other children to think of. So unless you change your mind, I guess there will be no wedding between our children.”

We heard Mrs. Kohn leave the house and. heard her carriage rumble away.
I looked at Evelyn. Her face was white and the silent tears were streaming down her face.

My father knocked on our bedroom door and entered the room.
“Evelyn”, he said, “Put on your shawl, we are going for a walk.”

I don’t know how, but father convinced her that a marriage to Joseph without his mother’s consent was out of the question. He made her promise to seriously consider other young men the matchmakers would bring around.

The smiles and brightness in her eyes seemed to disappear. A few men were brought to our home within the next few weeks and Evelyn agreed to marry a young Rabbi from a nearby town. The tailor brought his sewing machine into our house one month before the wedding. He made her a beautiful white wedding gown, suits, dresses, and. even a black wool cape lined with red fox fur. The cobbler came and made us all new shoes. Women from the village came and started to prepare all sorts of cakes and cookies and foods for the wedding.
One day while the preparations were taking place Joseph Kohn walked in unexpectedly. He put his arms around my mother and said.,
“0, I see you are preparing for our wedding.”
My mother said,
“Joseph, it is Evelyn’s wedding but not yours that will be taking place in one week.”
Joseph looked dismayed. What happened he shouted? My mother told him of the demands his mother had made. Joseph sat silent for awhile and then he said,
“Mother, I have made an unusually large sum of money on this trip. I could tell my mother that I had some losses and thereby be able to contribute two hundred dollars to the dowry. Could your husband borrow another one hundred dollars from his family? I know Evelyn loves me and not this stranger. We must find a way for our marriage to take place without alienating my mother.”

My mother sent me to call my father home from work. Again I heard the discussion around the table and my father refusing to borrow money from his employer or family.

I knew what I had to do. My trip to America would have to be postponed. I said,
“Father, Evelyn’s happiness is at stake here, so I am going to contribute my travel money to the dowry.”

My father agreed because he didn’t want me to leave home in the first place.

Joseph went home and told his mother that his future father-in-law had agreed to the dowry of five hundred dollars. The wedding was to take place in two weeks and she was to immediately send letters to her family inviting them to the wedding. My father went to the next town and told the young Rabbi that Evelyn was going to marry another man.

Once more our home became a place of song and laughter as we prepared for the wedding. It was early in June, a sunny day, and the orchard was still ablaze with the last of the cherry blossoms. I opened my eyes and saw Evelyn brushing her long hair. I could hear mother in the kitchen preparing the breakfast meal. Evelyn turned around and smiled at me and said,
“Little sister, this is the happiest day of my life, and I have you to thank for it. 1 will never forget your generosity and Joseph and I will try to repay the loan as soon as possible. I’m sure your dream of going to America will come true quickly.”

I jumped out of bed, hugged my sister and. looking out of the window saw my father already supervising the men who were putting up the long wooden tables in the orchard. I went into the other bedroom and awoke my little sisters. I said,
“Hurry, hurry, get up! There is so much to do today. So many guests will be arriving and we must help mother with the chores.”

The rest of the morning was a bee-hive of activity. I can remember the women of the village bringing their dishes, table settings, and setting the tables. There were women in the kitchen chatting and laughing while they helped with the cooking and the smells of the food warming in the ovens added to the magic of that happy time.
The guests started to arrive and shouts of greetings were heard everywhere. At last the time had come for the wedding ceremony. It was in the early afternoon. The guests seated themselves at the long tables decorated with bowls of wild flowers my little sisters had picked in the fields that morning. The town music­ians my father had hired, a fiddler, a drummer and an accordion player started to play quiet religious music.

The Rabbi and the Cantor stood under the canopy which was shaded by a large cherry tree. Joseph, in a black suit wearing a wide brim hat had a nervous smile upon his face. He walked down the aisle flanked by his mother who was dressed in a blue silk gown and wearing her pearls and his uncle, a short stout man with grey hair and a heavy grey streaked beard. The music changed and then came Evelyn, a vision of loveliness in her white silk wedding gown and a heavy white short veil covering her face, escorted by my father and mother. My father looked handsome and proud as he escorted his women to the altar. My mother dressed in her new green silk dress with her gold watch pinned on her bosom looked unusually calm and happy.

As the Rabbi began to speak I felt a lump in my throat and. the tears started to roll down my checks. Our family would never be the same again. I prayed that Evelyn and Joseph would have a long and happy life together.

After the ceremony, large platters of food and wines were brought from the house and placed on the tables. The musicians played fast happy tunes and couples joined hands and danced various folk dances. Other times just the men danced together and then the women placing Evelyn and Joseph in the middle of the circle. Children ran up and down the orchard playing Hide and Go seek. We drank and danced until the stars came out. One by one the couples and their children left for the homes of family and friends to sleep. The festivities lasted for five days and finally all the guests departed. We were happy but exhausted.

The house seemed strangely quiet without Evelyn. My mother appointed Ethel her next oldest daughter to take over the household duties.

We did not visit Evelyn often in her new home as my mother did not want Mrs. Kohn to think that we were taking advantage of her hospitality. Evelyn visited us often and after three months of marriage gave me ten dollars and said that she was sorry it was not more. Her mother-in-law kept a tight rein on the house-hold money and was even examining the records of the business closely these days.

I realized it would take a long time before Evelyn and Joseph could pay me back the loan. Each night I would pray to God to help me find a way to get to America.




Chapter Four
THE COURTSHIP
It was an unusually cold winter the year of 1906-1907. We ventured out only when it was absolutely necessary. As the weeks passed slowly by I became more and more restless. My sister Ethel had to remind me that the clothes needed mending and that the table had to be set. She sometimes she grew impatient with my day dreaming.

One day she insisted, in spite of the how­ling cold wind outside, that I take mother her lunch that she had left behind in her hurry to get to her shop. As I walked with my head bent low against the wind I decided to take a short cut across a small lake. I assumed the ice would be thick enough to hold my weight.

As I ran out to the middle of the lake I heard the ice crunch and give way. I remember how terrified I was, but I still managed to scream for help. I hung on to the edges of the ice, which kept breaking off, and suddenly I heard someone running towards me and yelling,
“Keep your head above the ice. “
I could see him crawling out to me with a long thick branch of a tree. I grabbed the branch, he told me to hang on and slowly started to crawl backwards, edging towards the shore line. When he knew it was safe, he got up, wrapped me in his coat, picked me up in his arms and carried me to his mother’s house at the edge of the lake. His sisters heard his shouts and opened the door. They helped me get out of my wet clothes, gave me a woolen robe and sat me before the hot large brick ovens. I was given hot tea mixed with whiskey to drink.

When I finally calmed down I realized that I was in the home of Gerson Bendetsky, the carpenter. He had a large family of ten children. His son Abraham who rescued me was a sturdy built fellow with flaming red hair and a mustache. I had seen him occasionally in the village but our families never socialized.

In those days there were class differences or as you would say today, class prejudices. My father, who had a good education, was an accountant and cashier in a large lumber mill. He associated with the business people of the town. Abraham and his father were carpenters and although they had a home equally as good as ours, they were considered tradesmen and the two classes never mixed socially.

I spent a few hours in their home until my clothes and shoes dried out. I talked to his sisters, Gertrude and Leah. Gertrude told me that she was waiting for her husband who had preceded her to America two years ago to send her ship tickets for herself and her three children. He wrote and said that he was sending the tickets in a few months and she was to be prepared to leave in the early spring.

I told her of my desire to go to America and my great disappointment that I did not have the money to buy a ticket. I told her my father refused to give me the money as he felt I would be safer and happier settling down with a man in Russia and raising a family.

Abraham walked me home and told me he also was leaving with his sister and had high hopes of earning a fortune in America.

I told my father and mother what happened. Father went to Mr. Bendetsky’s home to personally thank Abraham for saving his daughter’s life.

A few days later Leah knocked at our door and said that her sister Gertrude wanted to see me. The next day I went to inquire why she wanted to speak to me. She told me that she, being a frail woman, was apprehensive about traveling all that distance and she would feel better if she had another woman along who would help her care for her children. She said they would have enough money to buy one more ticket and if I decided to come along I could live in her house in America until I found a job and paid her back the loan.

My heart started to pound. I couldn’t believe my good luck. Of course I would join them but I would have to leave secretly as I knew my father would not consent for me to accept a loan from Gerson the carpenter’s daughter.

I left one rainy day in April. Mother and father were at work. Only Ethel knew of my leaving and I promised her I would return in about two or three years with lots of money and gifts. I joined Gertrude and her three children and her brother Abraham. Like thousands of other Russians we had no permit to leave and we traveled mostly by night. I remembered we took a small boat down the Dnieper River and were told to disembark in a lonely spot along the shore line. There we were met by a man who escorted us to a wagon. We were covered with straw and traveled all night. The children, thank goodness, were tired and slept in our arms. We were hidden in a spring house that day. That night another man came and took us with his wagon to a railway station.

We rode for hours and before dawn we were told to get off the train at a small way station because the next stop was a check point. This pattern of travel was repeated until we reached the coast of France. Even though I traveled all through Europe, I did not really see any of the large cities as they were always avoided. Traveling at night, one farm or forest looked almost alike. We boarded a small ship somewhere on the coast of France and sailed to England. We were all seasick on that short trip. When we reached London we all felt a great sense of relief because we knew we were free at last.

All I remember about London was the sun never shone and it was always raining. We went on to Liverpool by train and there boarded our ship, the Friezland. There was a heavy fog the day we left and I can still hear the loud fog horns like weird monsters calling to each other across the sea. We were moving at last and in spite of the gloomy weather my spirits were high.

Gertrude, I, and the three children shared a cabin with three bunks. Gertrude slept with her little daughter Sarah. The two boys Ben and Morris shared another bunk and I had one for myself. The cabin was tiny, but compared to some of the other accommodations, this was a luxury cabin. Abraham was in the hold of the ship, sharing the space with dozens of other young men.

I was a good sailor. So were the children, even when we encount­ered a storm at sea. It was different with Gertrude and Abraham. They were seasick for most of the trip.

I did all I could for Gertrude and took care of the children. On the last day out a dance was held in the dining room of the ship. All the tables were pushed to one side and the men who possessed instruments were invited to play folk music for us. Gertrude was feeling better and urged me to attend. I joined the dancers in a Russian square dance and was having an enjoy­able time. After a break I saw Abraham, looking pale and wan coming towards me. He sat down beside me and said,
“Etta you look very pretty tonight.”
I inquired as to his health, and he said that he could not wait to get off the ship.

When the music started again he asked me to dance with him. I stood up, and in a haughty voice said,
“No, thank you, Abraham, just because I left Russia doesn’t give you the privilege to expect me to socialize with you”.

I saw his pale face turn red and a flash of anger sparked from his eyes, but he said, nothing, walked away and left the room. I did not see him again until I was helping Gertrude gather up our belongings, making ready to leave the ship. Gertrude’s husband was waiting at the pier and wav­ing wildly but it took hours before we were united. We had to pass through customs, have a health examination and be inter­viewed. Each person had to give their name and country from which they had arrived. Abraham was in front of me and I heard the official say,
“In the United. States we have short names, so from now on your name will be Abe Benn.”

I also learned to my consternation that a person was expected to have fifty dollars in cash upon entry or have a relative or friend vouch that the immigrant would not ask for charity assistance from the government.
Gertrude’s husband, Mr. Frank Barsky, vouched for me and we were finally permitted to leave.

We all climbed aboard a trolley, Abraham and Frank carrying most of our bundles, and we started to ride past long rows of houses all looking exactly alike in long narrow streets. I noticed there were no trees or gardens but I was too excited and happy to have arrived to let the drab city dampen my spirits. We got off the trolley and walked two blocks down a long narrow street filled with children playing. Finally Frank stopped, took out his key, led us up a few stone steps, opened the door and led us into his house. There was a 1ong hallway with a staircase leading up to the second floor. The front room on the first floor was empty. The dining room had a large oak table and several chairs, none of them matching, lined around the walls. The kitchen, long and narrow had a doorway and one long narrow window facing a sma1l fenced in back yard. I noticed the yard was paved with red. bricks and had no grass or trees. There was a large black iron coal stove in one corner with a bucket of coal beside it. On the other side of the room was a sink.

Frank proudly showed us how to open and close the water spigots. This indoor running water impressed me as the height of inventive knowledge and I wondered. if there was a well beneath the house. Frank showed us a small wooden square box near the sink. He opened it and it was lined with tin and contained a cake of ice. In the next com­partment was stored the perishable food. He told us we would have to empty the pan filled with water each day and make sure to have the ice man deliver ice in the warm weather. In America he said they called this an ice box. A small table and. four chairs completed the furnishings in the kitchen. The house was lit by gas jets. Upstairs were three bedrooms. I noticed there were two double beds in the front room and one small wardrobe where Abraham and his nephews would sleep. Little Sarah would sleep in the middle room which was very small. It contained one cot and a crib. Frank showed me a closet with a few shelves where I could store my clothes. The back room had one double brass bed and one large bureau. This was the bedroom shared by Frank and Gertrude.

The big surprise was the bathroom. There was a bath tub, the first one I had ever seen in a private house, a small wash basin and most important, a toilet. Frank proudly explained that this was the latest of bathrooms and that is why he had rented this house.

Although the house was small and poorly furnished, I was grate­ful to these people for letting me share their home. Abraham and I walked around the neighborhood and I was surprised and happy to see so many familiar faces from our village. All around me I heard the Yiddish language spoken. I didn’t know it then, but we lived in a section of South Philadelphia that was a Jewish ghetto and I thought this was typical of the city.

The next week I helped Gertrude clean the house, wash the clothes and care for little Sarah. Frank was asking the neighbors to help me find a job.

In a few days a woman came to see me and said that she worked in a factory that made ladies’ coats. They needed seamstresses to sew fur collars to the coats. I assured her I could do this work

She took me to work with her on Sunday. We worked nine hours a day, six days a week. The work started on Sunday and continued through Friday at sundown. Saturday was our Sabbath day and. since the owner and the workers were Jewish, there was no problem.

I earned five dollars per week. I gave three dollars a week to Gertrude for room and board and fifty cents a week towards pay­ing off my ship’s ticket of fifty dollars. That left me a total of one dollar and fifty cents for carfare and any personal needs I had. I realized that I had to find a better paying job as I could never save enough money to return to Russia in two or three years. Unfortunately, in 1907 there was a depression in the United States. I remember wagons going through the streets and. people lining up to receive bread and food. This sight saddened me and this I thought was this the land of wealth and opportunity.

As the weeks went by and my search for a better paying job was unsuccessful, I started to have my doubts about the wisdom of coming to this country. The summer was very hot, and working in the stuffy factory, holding the fur collars, coming home at night to a hot noisy house, trying to sleep with a whimpering child in my room at night, began to have its toll on me. I felt that I had to get a room for myself where there was peace and quiet in the household.

One of the villagers ran a boarding house a few blocks from the Barsky’s house. When I went to visit her, I told her of my dilemma and she offered to let me share a large room with her sixteen year old daughter. She would charge me the same amount of money that I paid Gertrude for room and board. She also pointed out that a single girl, living in a house where a young single male lived, might give the neighbors something to gossip about and it was best for a girl to be careful about her reputation.

I went home and told Gertrude that I was moving and she under­stood my need for a quiet house and wished me good luck.

The young men in the factory started to speak to me and one man asked me for a date. That Saturday afternoon he took me to the movies, (at a cost of five cents each) and afterwards we walked In Washington Square with all the other young couples. I remember that he bought me an ice cream cone, the first I had ever tasted and I developed a passion for it which never left me. I enjoyed myself and hoped he would take me out again. When I returned to work the next day, I noticed the change in him. He was avoiding me and I felt hurt and then angry. At the lunch break I could no longer control my anger and went over to him and I said,
“Why are you avoiding me? What did I do or say to you yesterday that hurt your feelings?”

He looked ashamed and said,
“It is not of your doing. Last night when I left you, a red headed fellow with a red mustache stopped me in the street and said that you were his girl. He said that if I ever took you out again, he would beat me to an inch of my life. He looked so fierce and angry that I believed him.
“I’m sorry Etta, but this kind of trouble I’m not looking for.”
I said,

“I’m not Abraham’s girl, but it is not your problem.” and I walked away. My anger kept building up all afternoon and when the workday was over, I headed straight for Gertrude’s house. I was going to put a stop to this once and for all.

Gertrude was in the kitchen mending some clothes and she looked up and was pleased to see me. I asked to speak to Abraham but she told me she didn’t expect him home for at least another hour. She asked me why I looked so upset. The whole story spilled out and I saw Gertrude stiffen in her chair and a stern look spread across her face. What she said in the next few seconds stunned me.

“Listen here , Miss high and mighty,” she said, “If it wasn’t for Abraham you would not be in America today. I didn’t buy you a ticket, Abraham gave his ticket to you. In order that he book passage on the same ship he signed a contract as a debentured worker for one year. He works twelve hours a day for one half of the wages he could be earning at his trade. He sailed in the hold of that ship that made him so sick. He could have shared the cabin with me and the children.

In America we are all equal. We are all Greenhorns and if you still think you are better than my brother, then I suggest you go back to Russia with your haughty airs.”
I felt a chill go through me and I rose and told Gertrude to send Abraham around to see me no matter how late it was. I left the house quickly and returned to my boarding house. I asked my landlady to let me have the use of her parlor for a few minutes tonight to speak in private to Abraham. She said,
“Of course,” and I could see her look of curiosity but I said nothing and I went up to my room.

Late that evening Abraham came calling. He looked so tired that an over-whelming feeling of sympathy swept over me. I realized he must have taken a bath even though this was only Sunday night. His red hair was slightly damp, he was clean shaven, and he was wearing his Sabbath clothes. He smelled of tonic water.

I showed him into the parlor and rolled the doors shut. Before I could utter a work Abraham started to speak,
“I want to apologize for my sister. She had no right to tell you about my giving you my ship’s ticket. I always wanted that to remain a secret. Now that you know, I don’t even want you to repay the loan. I only ask Etta, that you give me the same chance to court you as you would other fellows. If in a few months after you really get to know me and you still don’t want to marry me, I promise you I will never bother you again.”

I realized how kind and considerate he was being and I wanted to be fair.
I said,
”All right Abraham, you may come around, but just on the Sabbath day and we will see.”
He rose, and looking at me, kissed my hands and said,
“It’s late, I better be going. I will see you on Saturday.”

I walked up the stairs to my room feeling relieved and sur­prisingly happy. I decided that next Saturday I would invite Abraham to visit my cousins the Millers.

Morris Miller came to this country in 1895. When he left Russia he worked his way through Europe and then traveled to Africa where he opened a general store in Capetown, South Africa. He did very well but came down with a fever and the Doctors advised him to leave the country and seek a healthier climate. He came to the United States and settled in Bristol, Pennsylvania. He had an Uncle and cousins in that small town. He married one of his cousins, Yetta, who was several years his senior. With the money he had brought and her rather large dowry, they bought a large frame house and store. The dry-goods and clothing store in Bristol provided them with a good living.

After a few years, Morris brought his old mother and father from Russia to live with them and their two small daughters.

My Aunt Edith was very unhappy living in America. She couldn’t accept the fact that the business had to be opened on Saturday. She felt that Morris was committing a mortal sin and no amount of talking could make her change her mind. There was no Syn­agogue in the town and on Saturdays she would shut herself up in her room, fast and pray all day, hoping to save Morrls’ soul.

When I first came for a visit on Saturday, she consented to come downstairs and even ate lunch with me.

Morris and Yetta urged me to visit them often. I would have been happy to visit them every week. I loved the long trolley rides through the farm country and Yetta was a warm and gracious hostess, but the carfare was forty cents round trip and I couldn’t afford to spend that amount too often.

Abraham was very receptive to my suggestion about visiting my cousins in Bristol on our first date. He insisted on paying for both our trolley fares. We arrived in the early after­noon and I could see that the Millers took an immediate liking to him. He joined Morris and my Uncle in the store and between customers I could hear them talking and laughing. Yetta asked me how long did I know this man, how did I meet him, and was I serious about him. I told her the whole story and she said,
“Etta, you are a lucky girl to have so handsome a man in love with you.” She suggested that I take Abraham for a walk along Mi1 Street, bordering the river before dinner. It was a crisp clear sunny day in autumn and the leaves were starting to turn different shades of gold, red, and brown. As we walked along the street with its large Victorian houses and. beautiful gardens, Abraham told me how much he was enjoying his visit with my cousins. He thought Morris was a clever man and quite modern in his outlook on life and especially politics.

I asked him what did they discuss and he said mostly politics. Abraham said Morris predicts that there will be revolutions sweeping through Europe and even Russia in a few short years and all the Kings and even the Czar will be dethroned.

He believes democracies will be established, patterned after the United States Government. I asked him what did he think, and he said,
“I believe what Morris said will come about, but not in our life time.”
That’s a clever man I thought. I started to look forward with pleasure and anticipation to our weekly dates. Abraham always planned something interesting for us to do. We would take walks in the park, take trolley rides to the end of the line and explore the new neighborhoods, go to the movies but not too often as I didn’t want Abraham to spend the ten cents admittance.

My landlady, who was a good friend of my mother’s, wrote to her saying that I was having a difficult time earning money and she did not think I could ever save enough money to return to Russia. She also informed her that I was keeping company with Abraham, the carpenter and thought that I would be marrying him shortly.

One day returning home from work my landlady handed me a letter from home. It was the first one I had received and I ran up to my room in happy anticipation thinking my parents had for­given me for having left home. I read the letter and started to cry. My mother said that she heard that I was keeping company with Abraham, the carpenter. She went on to say, please remember your background and do not cause us more anguish by marrying beneath your station. She also said that she and the family missed me and father would be happy to send me enough money to buy my passage home.

As I finished reading the letter, I knew that regardless of how homesick I was, I couldn’t accept the offer to return home. My pride stood in the way. I was afraid that I would become the laughing stock of the villagers.
A week later Abraham and I went to visit my cousins in Bristol again. Yetta took me into the parlor and said,
“‘Well, how long are you going to keep company with this man?”
I gave her my mother’s letter to read. As she read it, I saw her face flush red. She put it down and said,
“Etta, I am going to speak to you as if you were my own daughter. Your mother is living in a different world from ours and she doesn’t understand that times are changing. Look at you, you do have a pretty face, but that’s all. You are skinny and have a small bust and no dowry. When Abraham learns how to speak good English and. becomes Americanized, he won’t want you. He’ll look around and find, a nice plump girl, with a large bust and a good dowry and believe me, he won’t have too much trouble making such a match. Etta, be smart, marry him while he still wants you.”

Abraham and I were riding home when he asked me what Yetta had

said to me in the parlor that made me so pensive all afternoon.

I told him the truth. He 1aughed out loud., put his arm around

me, hugged me and said,

“I like skinny little girls.” Then he said, “Etta, I think it’s time you made up your mind. I don’t want to wait any longer. What will it be?”

I felt happy and secure with his arm around me and suddenly I knew I had fallen in love with him. I shyly said,
“I love you too, and I guess we should get married.”
He kissed me right on the lips in front of everybody on that trolley car. I could see people looking and smiling at us. I was so em­barrassed that I made Abraham get off the trolley five blocks before our stop. We went immediately to Frank and Gertrude’s house to tell them the news.

I could see that they were happy for us and Frank insisted we have the wedding at his house. We sat down to make our plans. Abraham was earning seven dollars a week and I five dollars. Twelve dollars was a good weekly sum in those days. We wanted to find a two room apartment, a kitchen and a bedroom. We had to have furniture and household goods and. I wrote to my cousin Morris requesting his help.

Morris stopped in to see us on one of his buying trips to Philadelphia. I had the flat ready and told him we would pay him back in installments. He vetoed the idea and said we could pay him the money whenever we had lots of extra cash on hand. I handed him the list, He hardly glanced at it and. said,
“The furnishings will cost you about fifty dollars.”'
I said,
”Morris, you know all these things will cost more like a hundred dollars, we don’t want charity.” He laughed and said,
“I can afford to be generous to my green­horn cousin. Just go and find a place for you two to live in. Yetta and I will be happy to dance at your wedding.”



Chapter Five
THE LANDLADY

Abraham and. I spent all of our spare time looking for an apart­ment. As the weeks passed by our frustrations and disappoint­ments mounted and we were beginning to despair of ever finding a decent clean place to live. One which we could afford.

Frank told Abraham that each day as he was riding past Fourth and Christian streets he notices a “Rooms for Rent” sign in the window of a large well kept looking house. The sign had been there for a few weeks and perhaps we should inquire. Abraham said,
“It’s probably too expensive, that’s why they haven’t rented it.”
I said,
“Let’s go around and investigate, what have we got to lose?”
We went to that house on Saturday and. sure enough there was the sign in the first floor window. The house was a three story red brick dwelling with a walk down store in the basement. The steps leading up to the house were gleaming white marble bordered by a fancy black wrought iron rail. Flower boxes with small green bushes decorated the outside of the two large windows on the first floor. The name on the store window in large gold. letters, read SAM ROTHBERG, Men and. Boy’s Suits.

I tugged at Abraham’s arm and said,
“This place will be too expensive for us, let’s go.”
Abraham said,
“We just might be lucky;” and he walked up the steps and rang the door bell. A short thin woman with black hair streaked with silver opened the door.

Abraham told her we came to inquire about the rooms and. she invited us to step inside. The hallway and. steps leading up to the second floor were covered with deep red wool carpets. There was a hall rack with a large mirror on one wall facing the doorway to the parlor. I could see some of the parlor in the reflection of the mirror. There was a large upright piano on one-wall and two beautiful blue velvet Victorian chairs divided by an ornate marble topped table near the door.

As Mrs. Rothberg led us up to the third floor, I knew that this was the house I wanted to live in. The rooms also pleased me. The large bedroom was freshly papered with white wallpaper that had blue forget-me-not flowers, and the kitchen had fresh white and green striped wallpaper. The woodwork was light brown with a coating of shellac. Abraham looked at me and I nodded my head yes. Abraham said we liked the rooms and how much was the rent? Before she told us the cost she asked us many quest­ions. What did we do for a living? How much did Abraham earn? Did we have relatives living in Philadelphia? What town in Russia did we come from? etc, etc. Apparently she was satisfied with our answers, because she said,
“I will rent you the rooms for nine dollars a month.”

When I heard the amount my heart sank. I heard Abraham say,
“Mrs. Rothberg, I can only afford to pay you six dollars a month, but I am willing to do any repairs around the house and next year I’m sure I will be able to pay you nine dollars per month.” Mrs. Rothberg said,
“Come down to the store and. I will talk it over with my husband.”
Sam Rothberg was a short stout man, with light brown hair and a friendly face. His wife was speaking to him softly in a corner of the store and. I could see him looking at us and nodding his head up and down as she spoke to him. Mrs. Rothberg came forward, introduced us to her husband, and. said,
“When do you want to move in?”
I squeezed Abraham’s hand and saw his wide smile upon his face and heard him say,
“I will give you one month’s rent now and we will be moving in just as soon as my fiancee’s cousin delivers the furniture and we are married which should be within a month’s time.”

We both left that house like two happy children elated at our good fortune. When we looked back, we could see Mrs. Rothberg taking the For Rent sign out of the window.

Our happiness was short lived. As we were walking down the street, some of the women sitting on their steps called to us. We went over to them and wondered why they wanted to speak to us. One women said,
“Did. you rent the rooms in Mrs. Rothberg’s house?” We answered,
“Yes, why do you ask? She said,
“Take my advice, Go back and get your rent money. She is a crazy woman. Any couple who moves into her rooms doesn’t stay more than two or three months. They always end up being evicted or having the police come and break up a brawl between them and the Rothberg’s.”

Abraham thanked them for their information and we walked on. Tears started to well up into my eyes and. Abraham said,
“Listen, I don’t care what those women said. She looked and acted normal to me, and. We can’t go on looking for an apartment forever. Let’s give it a try.”
I wrote to my cousin Morris that evening and told him we found an apartment and to send our furniture and household goods to the new address. Ten days later our belongings arrived. Mrs. Rothberg instructed the men where to place things and when I came home from work, a note was waiting for me telling me the furniture had arrived.

Abraham and I went over to arrange the furniture and put away our household goods that evening. I still remember how our two rooms were furnished.
There were two beige straw rugs with green leaves around the borders covering the floors in the bedroom and kitchen. In our bedroom was a large double brass bed centered in the middle of the floor. A brown lounge stood against one wall. A large walnut rocking chair stood near the windows. Yetta had given me a beautiful organdy bed-spread., imprinted with small pink roses and. a white dust ruffle all around the bed. Abraham hung up new green window shades and white lace panel curtains on all the windows. There was one large closet with built in shelves on top, and this space was sufficient to hold our few clothes and linens.

The kitchen was furnished with a round oak pedestal table with claw feet and six oak chairs. The legs were carved to match the table’s pedestal. On one wall was a small sink and beside it an open cup-board. I made a green net curtain to hang over it and there stored my few dishes, cooking pots and tableware service.

Abraham got two wooden boxes from the grocer, nailed them together, stood them against one wall and we covered it with white oil-cloth. He placed a two burner gas stove upon it with a heavy tin plate underneath the stove for protection from fire. We had a small wooden oak icebox in one corner. Mrs. Rothberg came up to inspect our new abode and she beamed with approval and invited us down to her kitchen for tea and cake.

The wedding was to take place in three weeks and Abraham as a wedding gift to me told me to have a dressmaker make up my wedding gown. I chose a pale blue thin cotton material with inserts of white lace. The dress pattern I chose had a high neckline with large leg-of-mutton puffed sleeves. It hugged tight at the waist line, falling gracefully in a wide circular skirt to the floor. I had a short white veil made and bought white kid high button shoes to complete my outfit. I didn’t choose to be married in all white as I was being practical. I knew that this dress had to be worn as a Sabbath dress for a long time.

Abraham bought himself a dark blue suit, white shirt and a light blue tie.
We invited the entire Rothberg family to our wedding plus all of Abraham’s family and my few recently arrived cousins and of course the entire Miller family.

Sarah Miller was my flower girl. She was dressed in a beautiful yellow cotton organdy dress with a large yellow bow in her long blonde hair. Yetta and Morris Miller and Gertrude and Frank were in the wedding party. Frank invited three friends who played musical instruments. One a fiddler, a drummer, and a mandolin player. Gertrude outdid herself and we had a bountiful sweet table with plenty of wines and liquor. Frank borrowed chairs from the neighbors and placed them around the walls in the empty living room. The canopy was placed in the center of the room. I confess I don’t remember too much about the ceremony, I remember being a tearful bride. I was thinking of Evelyn’s wedding in the orchard, surrounded by her immediate family and large number of aunts and uncles and cousins. In the midst of gaiety I had moments of homesickness.

After the last guest had left that evening and we profusely thanked Gertrude and Frank for their generosity, we departed for home.

I remember that I asked my husband to please stay in the kitchen while I got undressed and got into bed. He laughed and said,
“Etta, you are now my wife and you must not be bashful.”
I insisted and he acquiesced. We lay in the big bed discussing the wedding and fell asleep in each other’s arms like two happy children. We took the following day off from work. This was our honeymoon. I awoke early and went into the kitchen to make the coffee and soft boiled eggs. After breakfast Abraham insisted we go back to bed. I remembered being shy and afraid, but Abraham was tender and loving and our marriage was consummated that morning. Now I knew I had made a wise choice picking Abraham for a husband and I secretly hoped he felt the same way about me.

In the afternoon we took the trolley and went into town. We went to see a movie, looked into the store windows, and for the first time we ate in an expensive kosher restaurant. The next day we were off to work.

On my way home from work I stopped at the butcher shop and asked for a pound of soup meat. I stopped at the fruit store and bought two pounds of potatoes. I decided to make soup, meat and. potatoes for supper.

Now I must confess I knew almost nothing about cooking. O, I did help at home with the cleaning, washing and sewing but mother, Evelyn and Ethel did all the cooking and baking and I was never interested enough to notice how they prepared the meals. This was my first attempt at cooking. I got out my largest pot, filled it with water almost to the brim, peeled the potatoes, sliced them thinly, and with the meat put them in the pot to cook. After one hour the potatoes started to disintegrate. I tasted the soup; it was terrible.

I decided to add some color and flavor to the soup, but how? I got a brilliant idea. I brewed some tea and added it to the pot.

Abraham came home and as prearranged we always used the back stairway and I would bring down a pair of bedroom slippers, clean shirt and pants. Abraham washed up in the summer kitchen and left his dirty work clothes and shoes in a neat pile. I would pick them up later and. wash them in the cellar. As we went up the steps Abraham said,
“I’m as hungry as a bear, what did you cook for our supper?”
I answered soup, meat and. potatoes, and he said,
“Gcod. That’s what I like to eat for supper.”
He sat down. I served him the soup. He took one spoonful and. started to gag. His face turned red and he said,
“What in the world is this? Are you trying to poison me?”
I said,
“Is it really that bad?”
“Taste it,” he said and I did and ran over to the sink to spit it out.
He said,
“Let’s try the meat and potatoes,” and one bite was enough.
I started to cry. Abraham put his arms around me and said,
“Etta, don’t you know anything about cooking?”
I shook my head no. He said,
“Listen Etta, I think if you ask Mrs. Rothberg to teach you how to cook, she will. In the meantime, what can we eat? I’m starved!”

I brought out some cheese, and we had cheese, bread and tea for our first supper at home. After the dishes were done, I went downstairs and asked Mrs. Rothberg if she would teach me how to cook. She said,
”What did you cook tonight and how did you prepare it?”

When I told, her, she sat down in a chair, her hands went up to cover her mouth, her face turned red, her shoulders started to shake, the tears came into her eyes and she let out roars of laughter. It was the first time I ever heard her laugh and I felt hurt. When she stopped laughing, she said,
“Forgive me my dear, but what you told me was so funny that I couldn’t help myself. Of course I will help you. Bring all your pots and pans down to my kitchen. I can see that this will take awhile before you learn to cook. I will also teach you how to bake and will take you shopping and show you how to recognize good foods and bargains.”

I felt a great sense of gratitude and put my arms around her gave her a hug and said,
“God bless you Mrs. Rothberg.” She said,
“Etta, let’s not be so formal, call me Sadie.”

One evening when I was preparing the meal I suddenly felt faint and sat down in a chair. Sadie said,
“What’s the matter? You look so pale.” I said,
”I don’t know. I have been feeling nauseous each morning. She smiled and said,
“You have been married over three months now. I think you better have Abraham take you to see a doctor. There is a young Dr. Cooper who has recently moved into the neighborhood and I hear he is very good.”

The next night we went around to see the doctor. He charged one dollar a visit but Sadie said he was a medical school graduate and when you wanted the best you had to pay for it.

I liked Dr. Cooper immediately. He spoke Yiddish to me and put me at my ease. After asking me many questions concerning my health record and giving me a physical examination, he told me to get dressed and said.,
“Call your husband in. I have something to tell the both of you.”
Abraham came in and. Dr. Cooper said,
“Mazel Toy, You are going to become a father.”
I saw Abraham’s look of surprise and than a happy smile spread across his face. Dr. Cooper advised us that it would be best if I quit work as soon as possible and took it easy. Abraham shook hands with the doctor and we went to tell the Rothbergs the happy news.

I continued working for two more months as I wanted to complete our payment of debt to my cousin Morris. We started to make prepara­tions for the baby. Abraham went to the lumber yard and bought some walnut and started to make a crib and high chair. I started to sew and knit baby garments.

A few weeks later Sadie came home and told me the Doctor said she needed an operation. She said,
“How can I go and leave my four children and husband to shift for themselves?” I immediately volunteered to take over the household duties and urged her to have the operation. She said,
“Etta, I have one more favor to ask of you.”
She left the room and went upstairs to her bedroom. She returned with a small black velvet case, opened it, and took out diamond earrings, diamond rings, and a beautiful broach consisting of rubies and diamonds. She said,
“Etta, please keep these diamonds for me until I return from the hospital.” My heart started to race, and I said,
“Sadie I will do anything for you, but please don’t ask me to be responsible for these diamonds. What if they were stolen? How could I ever repay you? Why don’t you give them to your husband?” She said,
“He is so careless with my possessions that I don’t want to trust him with these.” I don’t really think that was the reason, but she continued and said,
“Don’t be upset Etta, I will find someone else.”
Sadie went off to the hospital and I looked after the children and did the household chores as I promised.

Sadie returned in a week but had to stay in bed a few more days. One day while I was tending to her needs in her bedroom she said,
“Etta, I guess you can give me back my diamonds.”
My heart skipped a beat and I cried,
“Sadie don’t you recall that I refused to accept your diamonds for safe keeping?” She said,
“I know that but I gave them to Abraham and he said he was going to hide them in your bedroom.“ I ran up the steps, I looked under the mattress, all through the pockets of our clothes, between the linens on the shelf, nothing! Where could he have hidden them? I became more tense as I waited for my husband to come home. I heard his foot­steps and ran down to meet him.
“Abraham,” I cried, “What did you do with Sadie’s diamonds?”
He calmly said,
“0, so you know about them, don’t worry, as soon as I change my clothes I will return them to Sadie.” I followed him up the stairs into our bedroom and he took down from the wall the heavy picture frame containing the portrait of his mother. He had brought a small pair of pliers and a hammer with him and proceeded to pull out the small nails that held the heavy cardboard backing containing the picture. There, between the backing and the heavy canvas picture, lay the jewels. I breathed a sigh of relief, gathered them up, and returned them to Sadie.

One day I told Sadie that I was going to visit a cousin. I returned unexpectedly as I had forgotten to take a letter that I had received from home and wanted to read to her. As I entered my bedroom I was surprised to see Sadie on her hands and knees looking under my bed. A thought flashed through my mind. I remembered the neighbors warning us that Mrs. Rothberg was a crazy woman. Sadie was surprised to see me and looked embarrassed but offered no explanation and as she left the room I saw her slide her fingers across the window sill. I was speechless and suddenly I knew the secret. Sadie had been coming up to our apartment and giving it a thorough inspection. She was what we called “Crazy clean” and she could not tolerate a careless or sloppy housekeeper in her home. I now understood why the other young couples were evicted and. how the quarrels started. I told Abraham that night about the inspection and we both laughed.. Abraham said,
“1 guess your housekeeping is passing inspection, It’s a good thing she wasn’t judging your cooking that first week or we would, have been put out before the month was up.” We never brought up the incident with Sadie and she never mentioned it either.

My baby son was born at the end of May and I dimly remember Abraham running to call the Doctor and my landlady staying with me. My son was born in that big brass bed and Sadie helped with the delivery. She cared for me and the baby and refused to have Abraham hire a woman to look after us.

The Rothbergs insisted on giving the Briss, which is a religious ceremony where the male child is circumcised.. It is also a joy­ous celebration attended by relatives and. friends.

I was upstairs in bed and the baby was taken from me. I could hear the people coming in. They came up to see me, one by one, and then returned to the parlor for the party. I could hear my son crying and I put my hands over my ears to shut out the sounds. He was brought back to me and I cuddled him in my arms, breast fed him, and finally his sobs subsided and he fell asleep. My cousins Morris and his wife came up again to bid me good-bye.
“Etta,” he said, “I don’t know what you did to deserve it, but if Mr. and Mrs. Rothberg were your own mother and father they couldn’t have given you a finer party to celebrate the birth of your son.”


The early part of the summer was one of the happy times in our life. My husband was working. We were happy living at the Rothberg’s home and my son was a beautiful healthy baby. Unfortunately I did not have enough milk in my breasts to feed my son so Dr. Cooper advised me to supplement his feedings with a few nursing bottles of milk.

In those days we bought whole milk from the dairy store and we didn’t know about the danger of feeding babies unpasteurized milk. Our son became Ill. He regurgitated his food, lost weight, and was whimpering most of the day and night. Dr. Cooper diagnosed the illness as Summer Complaint. We tried all different kinds of medicines to cure his ailment but to no avail. We took the baby to a specialist but even his medication did not help. We lived through a nightmare the next few months. Abraham and I got very little sleep. We took turns walking the floor with our son trying to get him to sleep. We both lost weight, were exhausted, and continually in a state of depression.

It was a cold day in January when I awoke to see the snow flakes drifting by the windows. The room was strangely quiet and I quickly got out of bed and went over to the crib. The baby lay still and as soon as I touched him I knew that he was dead. I don’t remember much after that. I have a vague memory of screaming, of Sadie and Sam in our bedroom, and Sam picking up the baby and leaving the room with Abraham. Abraham called Dr. Cooper and he came and made me drink something. I became heavily sedated. I did not even attend the funeral.

Unfortunately, in this time of tragedy neither of us turned to each other for consolation.

I don’t know what would have become of us if it weren’t for the kindness and the concern shown by the Rothbergs towards us. Abraham had not been working for weeks, and our savings were almost gone. Sam told Abraham not to worry about the rent. Sadie kept bringing us delicious cooked foods, coaxing us to eat.

She got in touch with my cousin Morris Miller and asked him to come and see what he could do to help pull us out of our depression. Morris came immediately bringing with him a well known physician. He examined both of us and told Morris that outside of being under­weight, he could find nothing physically wrong with us. He suggest­ed that my husband find work and that I be forced to get out of bed and to resume my household duties. Even go back to work in the factory. He said that unless we tried to overcome our grief we would both deteriorate not only physically but mentally as well and who knows what the consequences would be.

After the Doctor left, Morris sat down to speak to us. He pulled no punches. He said that he and Yetta had lost two children of their own and he knew the heart break we felt, but we were young and we could have many more children. He reminded me of how my mother would feel if he had to write and tell her that her clever ambitious daughter had died in America because she could not cope with her first tragedy. I honestly think that remark about my mother receiving a letter telling her about my death did it. That day was the turning point in our lives.

Abraham found a job, I got out of bed and I resumed my household duties and found part time work with a dressmaker. Little by little, life resumed its normal routine and Abraham and I started to live together as man and wife.

Almost a year had passed since the death of our son, and I began to have the morning sickness again.

We went to see Dr. Cooper and. he confirmed our suspicions. Again we were happy preparing for the new baby, but our hopes were dashed. I lost the baby through a miscarriage after three months. We were saddened by the loss but it was not the same tragic experience of having lost our first child. At least we knew I could have more babies and Dr. Cooper assured us we could have a large family if we wanted to.

My husband was working and making a fairly good salary. He paid the Rothbergs all the money we owed them but we could never re­pay them for the help and kindness they had given us during those tragic days.

Abraham felt that perhaps I had the miscarriage because I had to walk up three flights of steps to our apartment. He started to look for a new place for us to live in and found a four room house for rent nearby at a cost of ten dollars per month. It had a small parlor and kitchen on the first floor, and two bedrooms an a bathroom on the second floor. It also had a basement and a small enclosed back yard.

I was sorry to leave the Rothberg’s home. Sadie and I had more of a mother and daughter relationship than that of landlady and tenant. She understood the necessity of our moving and even helped me pack our few possessions. We remained life long friends and we attended all of her children’s weddings. When I think of Sadie, I thank God that we didn’t listen to the advice of her neighbors and get our rent money back.

Chapter Six
THE BOARDERS


We moved our kitchen and bedroom furniture into our newly rented house and then proceeded to shop in all the second band stores in order to furnish our living room and extra bedroom. We found a good solid walnut library set. It con­sisted of a long wooden setee, one large chair, a rocking chair, and a long oblong table that had shelves built under the table top for the storing of books. We purchased one iron bed and a bureau for the spare room. I had intended to rent the spare room to a boarder for ten dollars semi-monthly but little did I dream that my first nonpaying boarder would be my brother Jacob.

It was no more than one month since we moved in. Abraham was at work and I was in the kitchen ironing. I heard the door bell ring and when I went to the front door, there stood my brother peering through the window. I screamed,
”Jake”, opened the door and I pulled him into the vestibule. We stood there laughing and crying and hugging each other. I brought Jake into the kitchen and asked him if he was hungry. He said,
“I just want a cup of tea and some bread.”
I brewed the tea, set the table and put just about everything I had in the ice box in front of him. When Jake started to eat I realized how ravishingly hungry he was. I waited until he was finished eating and then started to question him about the family and what circumstances brought him to America.


Jacob was already married before I left for America. He and his wife had one son, Joseph, and one daughter, Mary. Jake was a manager of a large grain mill and I knew he made a good living. Jake said that he wanted to go in business for himself. He, with the help of an Uncle, who had experience in the manufacturing of candles, designed the machinery, built a small wooden factory and went into business. He said that he was quite successful and moved his family into a new home. One night a friend came running to tell him that his factory was on fire. He got into his clothes, hitched up his horse to his carriage and drove to the factory. The place was entirely gutted. He knew that it was a case of arson, but he could not prove it.
“Anyhow”, said Jake “What good would it have done to prove that it was a case of arson?” There was no insurance at that time and he was wiped out. He decided there and then not to start over again in Russia. He left most of his money with his wife and she and the children moved back with our mother. He left Russia a month ago, and here he was. I told him that we had hard times and although we could not put him into a business I was sure Abraham would find him a job.

My husband came home from work and was surprised to find Jake. He was sympathetic and said, “After you’ve rested for a few days, I will see what I can do to help you find employment.” Abraham took Jake over to see Frank, his brother in law. Frank had started as a peddler selling bananas and made enough money to bring his family to America.

You didn’t have to speak English to peddle bananas. You just had to know one word, Bananas. We sat around the table and taught Jake how to make change in American money.
Frank hired a horse and. wagon, took Jake down to the wharf, where the wholesale fruit markets were located, showed him how to buy bananas on the stalk and break them up into bunches.

Jake drove around the streets yelling “Bananas” and did a fairly good business.

When Jake came home at night, he looked so tired and unhappy that it pulled at my heart strings. I couldn’t bear to see him look so miserable.
” Jake,” I said, “What is the matter? You look so unhappy.”
“Etta”, he said, “Forgive me. I guess it’s false pride, but I am so ashamed at what I am doing to earn a living. There must be a more dignified way to earn money.” I understood how he felt, and. I said that I would speak to Abraham about it. Maybe he can help you get a job on construction.

That night as Abraham and I lay in bed I asked him if he could get his boss to hire Jake as a carpenter’s helper. Abraham did ask his boss and Jake went to work with my husband the following week. It didn’t take very long for me to realize that Jake was not as you Americans say hacking it. I asked my husband what was the trouble. He said,
“Etta, I’m afraid that your brother was not cut out to be a carpenter.
He is slowing me down and I am jeopardizing my own job trying to teach him.” I said,
“ Please be patient, it will work out in time.” He shook his head and said,
“I can tell you now that even if Jake works at this trade for years he will never make a good carpenter.”

Jake himself realized soon enough that this type of work was not suited for him.

We all went to Bristol to confer with our cousin Morris. My old Uncle had a brother who left Russia twenty years ago and settled in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. He had a second hand, furniture store and according to his letters was well to do. Uncle suggest­ed that Jake go to Mi1waukee, unannounced, and he was sure that the Uncle would help him get started in some sort of business. Abraham found out that the train ticket cost thirty dollars. This amount represented one third of our savings. We bought a ticket for Jake and I took him to the train station.

When he had to board the train, we fell into each others arms and wept bitterly. I knew it would be many many years before we would be reunited again.


It was just a few days after Jake had left for Milwaukee when I received a letter from my sister Evelyn. She said that her husband was thinking of selling the house and the grain mill and bringing the family including his mother to America. What did I honestly think of this plan?

I thought of the struggle we immigrants were haying just to earn a living. I guess I was feeling unhappy about Jake’s situation too. I thought of the beautiful house and gardens that were Evelyn’s home, the servants she had to do the chores and take care of her children, her husband’s respected position in the town and it seemed that leaving all that behind and coming to this country to start a new would be a foolish under­taking.

I wrote and told her that it was very difficult for immigrants to earn a living in America. There was no gold here in the streets. In fact there was much discrimination against the immigrants and especially the Jews. If one had a business they had to work long hours and keep open on the Sabbath day. I was sure her mother-in-law would not make the adjustment to this kind of life and would be unhappy. As much as I would love to have her living near me, I strongly advised her to remain in Russia. They accepted my advice and did not emigrate to America.

This was a letter that I would regret writing for the rest of my life.

Harry, a young Polish carpenter, was working with my husband and they became good friends. Harry was a bachelor and one evening he came over to our house for a visit. He told us that he wasn’t happy with the place he was living in and was looking around for a new boarding house. Did we know of any?
Abraham followed me out to the kitchen when I put the kettle on to brew tea and he asked me if I would be willing to take Harry as a boarder. I said yes, but with one stipulation, the money we received from Harry would go towards buying me a sewing machine and Abraham agreed. Harry was pleased that we asked him to board with us and he moved into our house one week later.

Harry’s hobby was fishing. Whenever he could get away he would pack his fishing rod and take the excursion train to Atlantic City, New Jersey.

Harry came home one Sunday night and told us that he was leaving Philadelphia and moving to Atlantic City. A large hotel was being built on the boardwalk and not only was the pay higher than in this city but the work would continue all year around as the carpenters could do the finishing work inside the hotel during the winter months. He suggested that my husband also join him. He said that they would work only five and one half days a week and Abraham could come home for week ends. It seemed like a good opportunity to add to our meager savings. I would also try to earn some extra money doing alterations on dresses for the neighbors since we now owned a second hand Singer sewing machine.

We paid sixty dollars for the machine and I was determined to earn the money back. Abraham went to work with Harry in Atlantic City the following week. I missed him and looked eagerly for his return each weekend.

We decided that I too move to Atlantic City and Abraham started to search for a place for us to live in. He was unsuccessful, because he said, that the city (which was very small) was mostly comprised of large stately frame summer cottages built for the wealthy. There were boarding houses for the workers, but no small houses or rooms available for year round rental.

Abraham had been working about two months in Atlantic City when I received a visit from Mr. Greenberg. He introduced himself and said that he was a builder and that Abraham had worked for him. He told me that he was impressed with Abraham’s ability to read blueprints and his knowledge of working with the surveyor machine and his fine workmanship. I told him that Abraham was working out of town and he told me to get in touch with him as he was going to offer him a contract for new homes he was going to build starting next month. I told him that Abraham didn’t know anything about the contracting business. Mr. Greenberg said that he knew that but if Abraham was willing to accept the middle bid for carpenter work that he had received ( which he thought was a fair price) he could have the job and he would help him all he could.


Instead of writing a letter, I decided to take the train to Atlantic City the next morning and relay Mr. Greenberg’s message personally. I had never been to Atlantic City and I had no idea how to find the place he was working at. I didn’t even have the name of the hotel or the address.

I went to the train Station, bought a ticket and on the train I started to speak to the man sitting next to me. I told him of my dilemma. He said that be lived in Atlantic City and he knew of two large hotels being built on the boardwalk near one another
- and I shouldn’t have any trouble finding them. When we got off the train he pointed me in the direction of the boardwalk and said,
“Good luck.”
When I walked up on the boardwalk, I saw the ocean with the waves breaking on the beaches, I was enthralled with the beauty of the scenery and hoped that some day I could return here for a vacation. As I was walking along I saw a policeman and approached him. In Russia we were afraid of the police but here in the United States they were regarded as our friends. In broken English I tried to explain to him that I was looking for my husband. His face broke out in a large grin and he said in Yiddish,
“You can speak to me in Yiddish as I am a Jew too.”
I told him that my husband was working on a large new hotel but I did not know how to find him. He said,
“I’ll help you” and we started to walk.,
I should say he walked but I had to run to keep up with him, He had such long strides. When we reached the hotel be called the superintendent and asked him if he had a red headed carpenter working here by the name of Abe Benn.

“Yes, why do you want him? Is he in any trouble?”
The policeman said,
“There’s a young girl here who wants to speak to him.”
The superintendent called out to the floors above,
“Abe, come on down, there is a young girl here who wants to speak to you.” I heard Abraham shout,
“I don’t know any young girls in this city.”
I heard him coming down the stairs and he looked surprised when he saw me.
“Etta”, he said, “What are you doing here? What’s the matter?”
I said.,
“Don’t be alarmed. Where can we speak in private?”
Abe escorted me one block down the board­walk to a bench and I told him about Mr. Greenberg’s offer. He went back to the superintendent, told him he was quitting as his wife did not want to be separated any longer. The superintendent said that he was sorry to lose such a good carpenter and would send his pay to Philadelphia in a few days. We took the train home and the next day Abe went around to see Mr. Greenberg and took the contract.

Abe, as I now started to call him, worked long hours studying the blueprints, figuring the cost of lumber and looking for good carpenters to employ. The pay for most carpenters back in 1910 was ten to twelve dollars per week. My husband was now earning thirty five dollars per week and it was no longer wise to put our money in the strong box and keep it in the house. We proudly walked into a bank and became depositors. For the first time in our lives we had a feeling of security.

One evening Abe came home from work and. put a blue velvet box on the table in front of me. He said,
“ Here’s a present for you.” I quickly opened the box and there were two beautiful diamond earrings. I was awe struck.
“Abe”, I said, my voice quivering, “Can we afford such expensive earrings?
Where did you buy them? How much did they cost?” Abe smiled and said,
“Don’t ever ask me the price of a gift. One of the men on the job needed the money and sold them to me at a bargain.”

I jumped up, kissed him, and ran over to the mirror and quickly put on the earrings. Thank goodness my mother had the foresight to have my ears pierced when I was a small child. I ran next door to show my neighbors the earrings and they made a great fuss over them. The next day I went around to my cousin’s house. We always went to the butcher shop together. I showed Ida the earrings and I could see that she was happy for me. She said,
“Etta you have a generous husband. I’m sure my Harry would never buy me diamond earrings even if he possessed a thousand dollars.”

At the butcher shop Ida called attention to my earrings and all the women surrounded me, looked at the earrings with envy in their eyes. Mrs. Lewison, the butcher’s wife asked me to remove one of my earrings so she could examine it closely. I did. She held it up to the light, scrutinized it closely and. handed it back to me and said,
“Wear them in good health.”
While Mr. Lewison was waiting on me, Mrs. Lewison called Ida aside and whispered,
“Ida, does Mrs. Benn really think they are real diamonds?”
r
Ida stated angrily (as she later told me)
”My cousin wouldn’t wear fake jewelry!”
Then said Mrs. Lewison,
“ I would advise her to have her husband return those earrings and get his money back. Ida those earrings are a semi precious stone known as Zircons. My father was a diamond cutter in Belgium and I know diamonds.”

Ida and I left the shop together and before we had walked one block she told me that Abe was gypped. I couldn’t wait for him to get home. As soon as Abe opened the door, I greeted him with
“Abe, the diamonds are a fake! Can you get your money back?”
Abe grinned and said,
“Calm down, I didn’t think you would find out so quickly. A jewelry peddler came around on the job and these earrings looked so like real diamonds that I decided to buy them. They cost five dollars. If you stop to think, I never said they were diamonds, you just jumped to that conclusion.” I angrily pulled off the earrings, threw them on the floor and said,
“I’ll never be able to go back to the butcher shop and face Mrs. Lewison!”

Some time later I started to gain weight and I suspected that I might be pregnant again. But I did not want to say anything to Abe until I checked with the doctor. Dr. Cooper confirmed my suspicions; he told me to be careful, eat good foods arid get plenty of rest. When I returned home I found a letter mailed from London, England and addressed to Abraham Bendetsky. I went into the kitchen to prepare supper, but my curiosity got the best of me and I opened and read the letter. It was from his sister Leah and read as nearly as I can remember as follows:
My dear brother Abraham:

I hope this letter finds you and your wife in good health. By the time you receive this letter I will be crossing the Atlantic Ocean on my way to America. I am depending on you to meet my ship, the Victoria, which I am told will arrive in America at the end of the month. I have no money with me, so you must vouch for me in order that I may be permitted to enter the country. I guess you are wondering why I left home and where did I get the money for my ticket.

After I passed my eighteenth birthday, father decided it was time for me to get married. The matchmakers brought around some eligible men and I did not like any of them.

Father said that I was immature and he would pick the right husband for me. He decided that Reuben the blacksmith, a man twenty years my senior, a widower with four children, was a good match for me. Father said that Reuben had a large
house and a fine barn, was a good provider and an honest man. When I protested that he was too old for me, father said a man of thirty eight is in the prime of life and capable of raising a second family. He said that I would get to like him after we were married. No amount of pleading on my part could make him change his mind. With mother dead, you and Gertrude living in America, I had no one to help me plead my side.

I decided to leave home. One day when father and the children had left the house, I broke open father’s strong box with a hammer and took just enough money to buy my ticket to America. I left the village and was lucky enough to get a ride with a farmer taking his produce into Kiev. I bought my ticket and I traveled I guess pretty much the same route you had. I had the ship’s agent address this envelope to you.
. Your unhappy sister,

Leah Bendetsky


I felt sympathetic towards Leah and was glad we had an extra bedroom so she could live with us. I let Abe finish his supper and then I told him about my being pregnant. He was delighted with the news and then I said,
“1have another surprise for you” and I handed him the letter. After he read the letter he said,
“1 was hoping for one addition to our family but I guess we are going to have two. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Why Abe” I said, “It’s going to be wonder­ful having your sister live with us.”

Two weeks later we went down to the pier and waited hours for the ship to arrive.
It was an exhausted tearfu1 Leah that greeted us. We took the trolley home and I noticed Leah’s clothes were almost in rags and her shoes were badly worn.
The bundle she handed Abe was so small that I realized that she must have come with practically nothing but the clothes on her back. When we got home I made Leah eat a good meal and, then took her upstairs, showed her the bathroom and explained how to open and shut the spigots and I ran the water in the bathtub for her. I gave her one of my new nightgowns and bedroom slippers.

Leah went straight to bed after her bath. I gathered up her clothes, went down to the basement and washed them and hung them on the line to dry. When I came up I said to Abe,
“You must give me some money so that I can take Leah and outfit her. You can’t expect your sister to go visiting or go to work in these rags.”

The next morning Leah slept late and I ironed her clothes. Later that day we went around to visit Gertrude and again it was a tearful reunion.

Abe gave me fifteen dollars to spend on Leah’s wardrobe. We went down to South Street and she bought a pair of high black button shoes, stockings, a hat, pocket-book, and enough material to make a skirt, two blouses, two dresses and underwear. The next week we were busy sewing and I saw that Leah was an excellent seamstress, in fact superior to me. After two weeks she looked rested and the color came back to her cheeks and she lost her woe-be-gone looks.

Leah was an attractive girl. She was five feet seven inches (which was considered tall for a girl in those days) with blonde curly hair, green eyes, a Grecian nose and full lips.

When we had completed sewing her dresses I started to take Leah around to visit our friends and relatives. After a month I asked my cousin Ida who worked in a blouse factory if she could get Leah a job in her place of business. She did, and Leah went off to work each day earning seven dollars a week. Leah made friends quickly with the girls in the factory. She invited them to supper and had parties at our house quite frequently. She a1so loved new clothes and each week she came home with large pack­ages under her arms. She bought herself a large black fox stole, different color hats, dresses, shoes, suits, etc. Leah was so busy working, shopping, and going out with her friends that she often neglected to wash and iron her clothes. She would say to me,
“Etta, please do me a favor. When you wash your clothes, will you please wash a few of mine too?”
Sometimes as she was leaving the house in the morning she would say,
“Etta, I would like to wear my blue dress tonight and I didn’t have the time to iron it. Be a good girl and do it for me.”
She was also untidy, leaving her clothes scattered about and I was always picking up after her and trying to keep her room neat and clean.

I liked the girls from the factory coming around and I admit it was fun to have the parties, but Leah never cleaned up after a gathering and always left the dirty dishes in the sink for me to clean up the morning after. I became resentful but I didn’t know how to broach the subject without appearing picayune.


Abe came home early one day and saw me ironing one of Leah’s dresses. He said in an angry tone of voice,
”Why are you ironing Leah’s dress? Isn’t she capable of doing it herself?”
I said,
“Leah asked me to do her a favor. She wants to wear this dress tonight.”
Abe said,
“You are a darn fool for letting her make a servant out of you and I want it stopped right now!”
I was hurt by his tone of voice. It was the first time he lost his temper with me and I felt he was being unfair to me. I said,
“1 am almost done.” and I continued to iron.
I took the dress upstairs and hung it in the closet and lay down for a nap. I was awakened by quarreling voices. I heard Abe say,
“I will not have you turning my wife into your personal servant! You know she is pregnant and since you don’t pay any board money, it wouldn’t hurt you to help Etta with the house work instead of gallivanting around town with your friends!”
I heard Leah say,
“You are just as mean as my father and if you don’t want me to live here just say so!”

I heard her run sobbing up the steps and. slam her bedroom door shut. I lay in bed distressed at what happened. I came down stairs to make supper and said to Abe,
“1 heard some of what you said to Leah. Couldn’t you have said the same things in a more gentlemanly fashion?”
Abe said,
“Don’t tell me how to talk to my Sister! From now on you better not find me catching you washing or ironing or cleaning for Leah. I want my baby to be born healthy!”

That night Abe and I were back to back in bed not saying a word to each other. I laid there feeling miserable at having had our first quarrel. The next morning Abe left the house so early that I did not hear him leave. I got up and went downstairs to make breakfast for Leah and myself. Leah came down and was putting on her coat and hat and I said,
“Leah, your breakfast is ready, why are you leaving without eating?” She said,
“I don’t want any.” I said.
“Leah, don‘t be foolish. You have a long hard day of work in front of you and you need the nourishment. Come eat.” Leah removed her coat and hat, came into the kitchen and sat down to eat with a sullen expression upon her face. I said,
“Leah, don’t be angry with your brother. He’s so anxious to have this baby born that he is acting like a big mother hen trying to protect me.” Leah said,
“Etta, if I do anything to displease you, I’d rather you say it to my face and not go behind my back and complain to my brother.”

I became angry and I said,
“Leah, I did not complain about you to Abe but you know what he said was true. I don’t want you to help me with the housework but you could be more considerate and keep your room neat and. wash the dishes and leave the kitchen clean after your company leaves!” Her eyes sparked and she said,
“If you don’t want me to invite my friends to your house, I won’t!”
She bounced out of the kitchen, put on her hat and coat and left the house.

The atmosphere was strained in the next few days around the house and I did not know how to relieve the tension. At the end of the week, Leah came home and said that she was laid off from the blouse factory. I said,
“Leah, don’t worry, You are such a fine seamstress that I am sure you will find work in another garment factory.”

She said,
“I did not come to America to be a slave to a sewing machine. I have no intention of ever working in a factory again.” I said,
“What do you want to do?” Leah said,
“1 don’t know but I am going to visit my Aunt Hannah in Chester and maybe she will help me.”

I met Abe’s Aunt Hannah at our wedding and we visited her at her home a few times. She had a large home, was considered well­-to-do and she entertained lavishly. Abe told me that Max Ritter was Aunt Hannah’s second husband and told me about her life. She had married a journalist in Russia thirty years ago. They had two children, a girl, Esther and a boy, Morris. After five years of marriage her husband emigrated to the United States. He promised to send for her and the children as soon as he found work and saved enough money to buy their ship’s tickets.

Her husband found a job with a Jewish New York newspaper as a reporter and he fell in love with one of the girls working in the office. He married her and they had a son born to them one year later. He continued to send small sums of money (unknown to his second wife) to Hannah for support of her and the children. When Hannah would write to him asking him when they could join him, he always gave some excuse and told her to be patient.

One day a cousin of Hannah’s accidentally met the husband and his new family. He immediately wrote to Hannah telling her about her husband’s new family. Hannah borrowed money from the relatives and came with her two children to New York City. She not only confronted her husband and his new wife in their apartrnent, but had her husband arrested and thrown into jail as a bigamist. After a few weeks, the second wife came to Hannah and pleaded with her to divorce her husband and promised her a substantial amount of money as a settlement. Hannah accepted the offer as she was desperately in need of money. After the divorce Hannah went to Chester Pennsylvania and bought a small grocery store so that she could support her two children. When I questioned Abe as to why she chose to settle in Chester, he said that he never found out the reason for her coming to that area.

His Aunt was an attractive woman. She was short, plump, with curly red hair, green eyes and a vivacious personality. In Chester lived a bachelor many years Hannah’s senior. He was a real estate broker and before long he and Hannah were married. After one year they had a son of their own and Max Ritter adopted Hannah’s two other children. Hannah continued to run her grocery store and when her daughter Esther grew up and married Willie, Hannah gave them the store as a wedding gift and retired from business. Willie expanded the store into a large market with a meat and fruit department.

When Leah went to Chester for help, Esther immediately offered her free room and board and seven dollars a week if Leah would clerk in the grocery department. Esther wanted more time to spend with her three small daughters. Leah accepted and the arrange­ment worked out fine except for one thing.

There was no social life for Leah in Chester. There was a very small Jewish population in the town and all the young adults were married couples. Leah came every Saturday evening to our house and returned to Chester by train on Sunday evening. My husband did not approve of Leah taking the last train out which got her to Chester at midnight but Leah refused to listen to him.

One Saturday evening she said to me,
“Etta, come with me to the toy shop. I want to buy a toy gun for a customer’s little boy. His birthday is this week and I am invited to the party.”
I noticed that she was very particular and finally chose a gun that looked like a real hand pistol.

She left Philadelphia on Sunday night at the usual time. The next afternoon I look in the Yiddish newspaper, unfolded it and there before my eyes was a large picture of Leah with the caption “YOUIIG LADY CAPTURES MOLESTER”. I sat down and read the article quickly. Two weeks ago as Leah got off the train she heard footsteps behind her. As she quickened her stride so did the person behind her. Leah started to run towards the police station which was located at the end of the long tree lined square. When she reached the police station he turned and ran in the other direction. Leah didn’t tell anyone about the incident. She thought she might be imagining things.

Leah decided to be prepared in case the man was waiting for her again.
She bought the toy pistol for protection.

The following Sunday when she left the train she again heard his footsteps following her. She quickened her pace and when he was nearly up to her, she whirled around and said,
“Hands up or I’ll shoot! “ The man stopped, surprised, and put his hands up. Leah got behind him, stuck the gun into his back and marched him into the police station. There happened to be a reporter present and the story went out to the newspapers that night.

When Abe got home, I immediately showed him the paper. He said,
“That darn fool girl, she might have been raped and strangled!”
When Leah came the following Saturday, I think she expected her brother to congratulate her on her courage. Instead he gave her a tongue lashing and said that if she wanted to continue to stay at our house each weekend she would have to take the early train home on Sunday.

Leah didn’t like the schedule. It cut into her social life but she knew that her brother was right and abided by his rules. I was concerned about Leah and one day I said to Abe,
“Don’t you know any young eligible men that you could introduce to Leah?” He said,
“Let Leah find her own husband.” I said,
“Abe, you are her brother and you have the responsibility of looking out for her welfare. The least you could do is to try and match her up with a good man.”

Abe thought a while and said,
“There is young man, Saul Goldman, a painter who has been in this country five years now. Hers an intelligent fellow, belongs to the Workman’s Circle and told me he hopes to go into a business someday for himself. He also plays the mandolin at weddings and earns some money towards his savings.”

Abe, I said,
“That sounds like a good eligible man. Bring him around this Sunday to meet Leah and I will have an early dinner.”
When Leah arrived the next weekend, I told her that Abe had invited a very nice young man to dinner on Sunday. She didntt seem too enthusiastic about meeting her blind date.

Saul Goldman arrived promptly, bringing me a box of candy and we introduced him to Leah. I could see he was immediately taken with her and was trying to be very sociable. Leah held herself aloof and hardly said a word at the supper table. After supper, the men went into the parlor and Leah and I started to wash the dishes. I whispered.
“Leah what do you think of him?”
She said,
“1 don’t like red headed men.”
I replied,
“Leah, your twin brother is a red head!”
She said,
“They all have nasty tempers.”
I laughed and said,
“A smart woman knows how to act so that her husband doesn’t have much reason to lose his temper.”
I told her about Saul saving his money in order to go into business for him­self. He did not want to remain a painter all of his life. Leah suddenly seemed interested and when we went into the parlor to join the men she became sociable and even started to flirt with Saul. I saw that Saul looked pleased. After awhile Abe reminded Leah that it was time for her to leave in order to catch the early train home.

Saul rose and said that he would be happy to escort Leah to the train station. The two of them left and I could see them walking down the street talking and holding hands.

Saul started to date Leah every week-end. After a few weeks I asked Leah if Saul ever mentioned marriage to her. She said,
“He talks about everything under the sun except marriage.”
That night I asked Abe to talk to Saul and ask him what his intentions were towards Leah. Abe said,
“Nothing doing. If you want to act as a matchmaker, that’s your privilege, but I won’t”
“A1I right” I said, ”I’ll do the talking myself. You just invite Saul to dinner on Wednesday.”

Abe brought Saul home and after supper Abe excused himself and said that he had to go out and buy some cigarettes.

Saul and I were alone in the parlor and I said,
“Saul I want to ask you something and I’ll come right to the point. I know that you like my sister-in-law. Do you intend to marry her?”

Saul said,
“Etta, I am very fond of Leah, but 1 am not in a position to support a wife. I am saving my money so that I can open a business and after I have succeeded I will think of marriage. I hope Leah will be willing to wait for awhile.‘ I said,
“Saul if you sit down and figure out how much you are paying out for room and board, someone to do your laundry, and the money you spend taking out girls, you will see that you can afford a wife. You will probably find yourself saving more money too. Everybody says that two can live as cheaply as one and it’s true. Furthermore, if you go into a business you will need a partner to help you in the store. Leah is a good business woman. My cousins say their grocery business has improved since Leah has been working for them.

“I’m sure Leah’s relatives will be most generous with their wedding gifts. You know Leah is a very attractive girl and some men are already asking Abe to introduce her to them. (God forgive me for telling a white lie.) I am sure Leah will not be single for too long a time.”

Saul thanked me for my advice and said he would think it over. He said to tell Abe he had to go home early and he left the house.

I was a successful matchmaker because the following Sunday Leah and Saul walked into our house excited and happy and Leah was wearing a tiny diamond engagement ring on her hand.

They were married in Aunt Hannah’s home five weeks later. The Ritter’s spared no expense. The tables were laden with all sorts of delicious foods, wines and liquors. Everybody danced (I couldn’t. I was too heavy with child.) and Abe danced all night. I had never seen him so merry. I know that he was happy that Leah had found a mate, but I also think he was happy to pass the responsibility of looking out for Leah’s welfare to another man.



Chapter Seven
JOYS AND SORROWS

The money in our bank account was accumulating rapidly and we started to talk about buying our own home. Abe had gotten another contract and was building houses at South Tenth Street between Shank and Porter Streets. They were made of red brick with large stone porches. These row houses were considered lux­urious in those times. The house had hardwood floors throughout and the most modern gas fixtures. It had a large black coal stove in the kitchen and the cabinets were made of walnut. There was a large parlor, dining room, and kitchen on the first floor, and three good sized bedrooms and a modern bathroom on the second floor. It also had a large back yard enclosed with a wooden fence. I liked the house as soon as I saw it and I asked Abe if we could afford to buy one. We inquired at the bank and found that we had enough money for a down payment and the banker was willing to give us a mortgage.

When we moved in, Abe would not let me do a thing. He cleaned the house, hung all the window shades and curtains, opened all the boxes, put our household wares in the closets, and arranged all the furniture at my direction.

We also bought a new brown leather parlor set with heavy mahogany borders consisting of a love seat, one large chair and a rocker. I bought live rubber plants and placed them around the room. We had straw rugs on the floors.

Our daughter Gertrude was born one month after we moved into our new home.
Abe bought a large white coach and a white fur carriage cover. The baby had all new clothes. I bought only pasteurized milk from the milk man and Gertrude was a healthy and happy baby. Sometimes she slept so much that I would become apprehensive and tiptoe into the bedroom every few minutes. When I told Dr. Cooper that I thought the baby was sleeping too much, he laughed and. said,
“Stick her with a pin and. I’m sure she will wake up and cry for you.”
Abe worked nearby and often came home for a few minutes during the day to look at her and I think he was also checking up on me, making sure that I was taking proper care of her.

When Gertrude was three months old Abe started to come home late from work and I could smell the whisky on his breath. When I questioned him, he readily admitted that he was stopping at the saloon after work with his carpenters for a drink. I said that I didn’t approve of this practice but Abe said he didn’t want to appear stuck-up before his crew and no amount of arguing on my part could get him to stop.

One Friday evening he was later than usual. I was angry and ate my supper, dressed Gertrude, put her in the coach, and started. to walk down the street towards my cousin’s house. I spotted Abe staggering along on the pavement. I was not only embarrassed for fear the neighbors would see him, but I was suddenly afraid of him. In spite of my fear I went to his aid. He put his hands on the coach and started to push it towards me.

I also kept my hands on the coach as I was afraid that Abe would push the carriage out into the street. When we got home I ran upstairs, undressed Gertrude, pushed her crib into the back bedroom and locked the door.

I heard Abe calling me and pounding on the door but I wouldn’t unlock the door. Later on I heard him vomiting and moaning in the bathroom but I did not come out. In the morning I unlocked the door and went into the bathroom. It was in a mess. I went into the front bedroom and Abe was sound asleep in his dirty clothes. I took some clean clothes out of the bureau, took Gertrude downstairs, fed her, dressed myself and the baby and put her in the coach. Then I took the bucket and some rags and walked upstairs, awoke Abe, threw the bucket and rags on the bed and said,
“Clean up that mess in the bathroom and yourself before I come home tonight.”
I stormed out of the house with Gertrude and spent the entire day at my cousin’s house. When I returned in the evening I saw Abe sitting in the dark parlor smoking a cigarette. I said,
“Abe, how do you feel?” He answered,
“Terrible.”
I took Gertrude upstairs and the crib was back in our bedroom and the bathroom had been cleaned. Then 1 returned to the parlor I sat down in the dark and said,
“Abe, I will put up with your stubbornness and temper but I will not live with a drunkard. If you come home drunk just one more time, I will take Gertrude and leave you and get a divorce. This is not a threat, but a promise. ”

Abe said,
“Etta,1 don’t know what was put into my drink yesterday but I thought I was going to die last night. I made up my mind never to enter a saloon again as long as I live. You will never see me drunk again.”

Abe had his one shot of whiskey at home before supper each night and some wine with his meal, but I never did see him drunk again.

Summer came around and almost every Sunday afternoon we would walk in the square with Abe proudly pushing Gertrude in her coach. I noticed that most of the men had heavy gold pocket watches with large gold chains and fobs decorating their suits. The ladies had gold earrings, rings, lapel watches and bracelets adorning their personages. Abe had only a cheep steel pocket watch and I had only my wedding band. I said,
“Abe, don’t you notice how nice the gold jewelry looks on the men and women? I think we could afford to own some. We are probably better off financially than most of these married couples and we look like paupers.”
Abe said,
“I guess you are right. Anyhow my engagement gift to you is long overdue so next Saturday we will go to the Jewelry store and you can select what you want, of course, within reason.”

I selected a heavy gold mesh bracelet an Elgin watch and chain for myself and had the jeweler etch our initials on the clasp of the bracelet. Abe selected an Elgin gold pocket watch with a gold chain and fob with a small diamond set in the fob and a gold signet ring.When I walked in the square the next Sunday, I felt elegant wearing my new gold jewelry.

One day the postman brought me a letter from my brother Jake in Milwaukee. The Uncle, as we had hoped did help Jake get started in a second hand furniture business. He was successful and brought his wife and children to America. His son Isadore was born on the ship coming over and another daughter, Ethel was born two years later. My sister Ethel had married shortly after I did and she and her husband and two sons also emigrated to Milwaukee. My brother took Ethel’s husband into the business as a partner. Jake suggest­ed that we sell our house and come to live in Milwaukee so that we could all be together. He said that he was sure Abe could get into the contracting business in that city and do well.

I gave the letter to Abe when he got home that night. Abe said he didn’t think it was a good idea to move to Milwaukee. He pointed out that the winters were more severe in that city and therefore the building season was shorter. He also said that the builders were getting to know him and he expected to be very successful in this city and did not want to start over again building his reputation. I wanted very much to be with my family but I was afraid to insist on the move as Abe was doing so well financially.

Our second. daughter, Ethel, was born two weeks before Gertrude’s second birthday. Abe said that she should have been born a boy. She started to walk at an early age and was a tomboy. Ethel was always climbing out of her crib, climbing on chairs (and falling off) and l had to strap her in the coach: she was such an active child.

When Ethel was eighteen months old I was again pregnant and Dr. Cooper said I should expect to give birth about the middle of August.

It was a hot day on the fourteenth of July and I had just scrubbed the kitchen floor and went outside to take some clothes off the line. Unknown to me, Ethel pulled a chair up to the kitchen sink, climbed up, and took a water glass out of the cupboard. She apparently lost her balance or the chair slipped from beneath her and she went crashing down to the floor, the water glass shattering and the fragments almost severing her thumb from her hand. I heard her screaming and rushed into the kitchen. I saw my child lying on the floor and the blood was gushing out of her hand. We did not have a telephone in the house in those days to call for help, so I wrapped a clean towel around her hand, scooped her up into my arms and ran as fast as I could to the hospital located five blocks from my house.

When I reached the hospital I ran into the accident entrance and. saw a panel of buttons and proceeded to push all of them. Nurses and interns came running out, took Ethel from my arms and then I fainted dead away. When I came to, a nurse and an intern were standing by my side and I was lying on a cot. I asked them where my daughter was and the intern said,
“You are lucky, a very fine surgeon just happened to be on duty and he is sewing up your little girl’s thumb.”

It was about one hour later (it seemed like an eternity) and a nurse and doctor came into my room. The nurse put a sleeping Ethel with her heavily bandaged hand into my arms.

The Doctor said,
“Mrs. Benn, she is a lucky little girl, I had to put twenty stitches in her thumb but I am sure she will have full use of it. I want you to take her to your own doctor in a few days to have her hand re-bandaged.” He asked me where I lived and said he would drive us home in his automobile. It was the first time I had ridden in an automobile and I was sorry that Ethel was asleep. She would have enjoyed it so much. When he helped me out of the car I asked him to send me a bill but he said the hospital would bill me.

The next morning Abe went off to work and as I was clearing the breakfast dishes off the table a sharp pain went through me. I sat down and after awhile the pain subsided but it began again in a few minutes and it felt like labor pains. I sent Gertrude next door to call in my neighbor. She stayed with me for an hour and then insisted on going for the doctor. Dr. Cooper arrived at one o’clock in the afternoon and my third daughter, Freda Minnie, was born one month prematurely at four o’clock that afternoon. She weighed just a little over four pounds but Dr. Cooper assured me that she was a perfectly normal baby.

My neighbors came in to see me and I’ll never forget the stupid remark of one of the neighbors. She looked at Minnie and said,
“0, this child will not live, she’s much too thin but than you have two other daughters so I guess it‘s not so tragic.” I felt a surge of anger pass through me and I guess Minnie didn’t like that remark either because she started to cry and. kick her skinny legs.

Abe hired a full time housekeeper for two months because I was slow in regaining my strength.

That fall I put Ethel out on the porch to play and dressed her in a red wool hat and sweater. I went inside to clean the house and one half hour later I went out to see what Ethel was doing. The gate was open and Ethel was nowhere in sight. I ran down the street looking for her and calling her name. My heart started to beat wildly and a thought flashed through my mind perhaps some­one had taken Ethel off the porch. She was such a friendly child that she would go with any stranger. I was in the next block around the corner when I spotted her red wool hat. She was chasing a kitten down an alley. I ran up to her and picked her up in my arms and held her so tight as we walked home that she started to cry and struggled to get out of my arms.

That night I told Abe about the incident, he said nobody could come on the porch without me unlocking the door and the children wouldn’t be able to get out. That week Abe built the screening around the porch. I felt peace of mind as I put the children out to play and Minnie in the coach and went about my household duties.

Abe was making love to me again and I was afraid of becoming pregnant.
I didn’t feel strong enough to have another child and I felt that three daughters to raise was a sufficient number of children to complete our family. I went to confer with Dr. Cooper and ask him if he had any pills that I could take to prevent pregnancy. He said that nothing was on the market yet that was considered foolproof and safe. He told me that during certain days in the month a woman could live with her husband and not become pregnant. The explanation was so complicated that I left the office feeling discouraged.

A few days later I read in my Yiddish newspaper that a woman by the name of Margaret Sanger was coming to Philadelphia to speak about planned parenthood and pamphlets would be given to each woman at the end of the meeting explaining methods of birth control. I told Abe that I wanted to attend that meeting and he said to go ahead. He would sit with the children that night.
MARGARET SANGER (1916)

I took my cousin along (she had three small sons and didn’t want any more children) and we left our homes early in order to get a seat up front. I remember how crowded the hall was in spite of our early attendance and we got seats up front but on the side near the exit door. The women in the ball were very noisy but when Margaret Sanger appeared on the stage a hush fell over the audience and when she started to speak you could have heard a pin drop.

She said that every couple had the right to limit the number of children they wanted to raise. It was to the woman’s benefit to space the childbirths from at least two and preferably three years apart. Unless we started to control the population in this world we would be in dire trouble. She said that every child born had a right to decent medical care, housing, good food, and a proper education. She felt that all women had a right to know about the methods available to prevent pregnancies.
Just then I heard a disturbance and a whistle blowing and we looked back and saw policemen coming down the aisles and police­men were surrounding Margaret Sanger on the stage. My cousin jumped up and said,
“Etta, let’s get out of here!”
Quick as a flash we ran out the exit door into the alley and ran and caught the trolley home.

I told Abe what happened and what Margaret Sanger had preached. I also told him that I was disappointed that I did not get one of the birth-control pamphlets. Abe said,
“Etta, if you do not want to have any more children than I will be the one to practice birth control and I know what to use.

It was 1916 and the war was raging in Europe. I stopped getting letters from home. None of my letters were answered. I became very worried as I had been reading reports in the paper about the pogroms in Russia. I went to the Red Cross for help but they said there were too many displaced persons and I should wait until conditions settled down. They were sure that my family would get in touch with me.

The postman rang my bell and he handed me a letter and said,
‘Mrs. Benn, here is a letter from Russia and I know you have been waiting for one for a long time.”
I thanked him and with trembling hands sat down on the porch rocker and opened the thick letter. It was from my mother. As I read the letter I felt my­self starting to shake and I had a wild desire to scream and bang my fists against the wall but my children were playing in front of me and I had to control myself and not frighten them. The letter contained far more tragic news than I had dreamed possible. I took my children next door and asked my neighbor to care for them until my husband came home. I told her that I had to be alone. I told her quickly of some of the tragic news and she wanted me to stay with her but I couldn’t and returned to my house. I lay in bed that day crying and screaming into my pillow.

Abe came home in the evening and I heard him run up the stairs shouting,
“Etta, Etta, where are you? Where are the children?”
He came into the bedroom and I said,
“The children are next door,” and handed him the letter. I had read it so many times during the day that I knew it by heart. It began:
“My dear daughter Etta:
When you, then your brother Jacob and his family, and then Ethel and her family left Russia to live in America I cried bitter tears because I was afraid that I would never see you again. Now I cry bitter tears because all of my children did not leave this wretched land.

I know that what I am about to tell you will break your heart but I know you would want to know what has happened to your family. Joseph was away on one of his business trips and the Cossacks came thru our village. They killed Evelyn, her two children, and her mother-in-law. Her youngest daughter, Kate was saved because one of the servants put her a crucifix around Kate’s neck and said the child was her daughter. They looted the house and set fire to it. They went to Joseph’s grain mill where your sister Mina and her bridegroom of three months were working, killed them and set fire to the grain mill. They killed your father in the office of the lumber mill, stole the money from the safe and set fire to the office. I and Rachel were saved because the farmer, John, who took care of our orchard and vegetable garden came and hid us in his barn. They looted and vandalized the house but thank goodness they did not burn it so we still have a place to live in. Your sister Pearl and her family were living in Kiev and. no harm came to them, Thank God! After a few days had passed the servant brought Kate to me to raise. I don’t know what happened to Joseph. We haven’t heard from him and I am afraid that he is dead too.

Tell your husband that his family were forewarned and escaped across the lake and hid in the forest. Their house was also looted and vandalized but at least they are alive, thank God. I wish that I too were dead but I must remain strong because my daughter and granddaughter need me.

We are in desperate need of food and clothing. Please send us whatever you can spare or I am afraid we will not survive the winter. Please send this letter on to your brother and sister. My regards to your husband and may your family never want for food.

Your grieving mother,

Riva Bellatchaikovsky”

Abe finished reading the letter and. I could see the tears in his eyes. He came over and sat on the bed and put his arms around me and said,
“Etta, tomorrow I will go to the bank and withdraw a large amount of money and send half of it to your mother and half of it to my father. Stop crying dearest, after the war is over we will try to bring your mother and the children over here to live with us.” I never loved my husband more than I did at that moment for his generous and forgiving nature.

The next day Abe spoke to the banker about the best and safest way to send the money to Russia. The banker advised him to send small sums of money frequently and to have the families acknowledge receipt before sending more money. We did. this and also sent large packages of clothing and foods such as sugar, canned foods, flour, and spices. Mother acknowledged receipt of the money but many times the clothing and food packages never arrived. Mother advised us to stop sending the packages. She said that with the money we sent her she was able to buy all the necessities.

After a few months I received a letter from my sister Pearl. She said that she had paid a visit to mother and found her well provided, for thanks to me, Ethel and Jacob. She found out that mother was also giving money to all the relatives and even helping some of the gentile neighbors. Pearl said that she also was in need
of help and if we sent a little less to mother (who had more than she needed) and sent a few dollars to her family, they could live in more comfort and it would be greatly appreciated. I showed the letter to Abe when he got home from work. Abe said,
“It looks like jealousy is rearing its ugly head. I think we should continue sending the money to your mother and let her be the judge of who needs to be helped.”
The year was 1917 and the United States entered the war. That spring very few private homes were being built in the city. Abe got no contracts that year. He went to work in the ship yard down by the Delaware River. Our income was cut almost in half. We tried to live frugally and spent money only on the necessities but with the high inflation, supporting our family, and sending money abroad, each month our savings were being depleted. Abe worked long hours. He took all the overtime offered to him so that he could earn more money. He came home each night looking chilled and exhausted. I pleaded with him to work less hours as I could see he was undermining his health. The influenza epidemic swept Philadelphia and dozens of adults and children were dying each day.

One night Abe came home and hardly ate his supper. He said that he was tired, was going to take a hot bath and go to bed. I was clearing the dishes off the table when I heard a loud thump on the floor above me. I ran up the stairs and found Abe lying on the bathroom floor. I ran to get my neighbor’s help and Mr. Steinberg came in and helped me put Abe to bed. He then went for the doctor.

Dr. Cooper said that Abe had the flu and gave me instructions on how to care for him and he told me to be sure and keep the children out of his room.

I didn’t take my clothes off for two days. Abe was delirious and I was afraid that I might lose him. Dr. Cooper came twice a day and tried to get someone to come in and help me but people were afraid to come into a house where a person was ill with the flu. Abe was in bed for ten days and was recovering when first Minnie, and then in quick succession Ethel and Gertrude, became the next flu victims.

Abe and. I took turns at eating and sleeping and nursing the children. Dr. Cooper came every day and I would hand him a list of what we needed. His wife purchased all the drugs and foods that we needed and the doctor delivered them as he paid us a visit. Our children finally recovered. We were luckier than most parents.

I guess it was inevitable that I was the next one to come down with the flu. In my delirium my dreams were so vivid that I still remember them.
‘I was a young child again and I saw myself going down to the river with the other young girls and splashing in the water. I wanted to float down the river but someone was holding my hands and calling my name and pulling me back to the shore line.

I remember running home in the hot sun, being hungry and going into the vegetable garden and pulling a cucumber off the vine. I then went into the house, got some black bread, rubbed the crust with garlic and sat down at the table eating the garlic bread, a piece of herring and the cucumber with much relish.’

I woke up and saw Abe sitting in the rocker beside my bed dozing. He had a few days growth of a beard upon his face and he looked pale and tired. I called Abe and he awoke with a start. He leaned over me, touched my forehead and said,
“Thank God your fever is broken.” I said,
“How are the children?” Abe said,
“They are all right and I am trying to keep them in bed as much as possible.”
I said that I was hungry and wanted some black bread, herring and a cucumber. Abe smiled and said he didn’t think that was the proper food to eat for someone who hadn’t eaten in three days. I was in bed for another week and Abe finally went back to work at the shipyard after a month.

I had developed a bad cough and couldn’t shake it. I was always tired and just taking care of my daughters and preparing the meals was almost too much for me. Abe started to help me with the household chores. He washed the clothes for me, cleaned the kitchen floor and bathroom, washed the windows and did all my food shopping after work and. on Saturdays.

In spite of the help I did not recover. Abe went to confer with Dr. Cooper. The doctor advised Abe to sell the house and to move his family to the country. He felt that the fresh country air, good food and rest was the only way that I could regain my health.

Abe came home and told me that he was putting the house up for sale and was going to move us to the country as Dr. Cooper had advised. The house was put up for sale a little below market value and it was sold the very next week. Abe went into the country and started to look for a place for us to live in.

I felt sad about selling the house and leaving all my friendly neighbors but I realized that unless I recovered my health I would not live to raise my daughters.





Chapter Eight
STEINBERG’S FARM

At the turn of the nineteen hundreds many families, during the summer months, instead of living in those narrow streets of Philadelphia would spend a few weeks vacation on the farms surrounding the city. This was a good added source of income for many farmers. Our neighbors had spent the previous summer at the Steinberg farm and spoke very highly of the Steinberg family. My husband went to investigate that particular farm and he liked what he saw so much that he gave Mr. Steinberg one month’s rent in advance.

The following month we packed our belongings, put some of our furniture in storage and Abe rode with the moving men to show them the way to the farm. Abe gave me the directions and I took the children on the trolley car.

One reason why Abe chose this farm was that the trolley line ran just two blocks east of the farm. He could take the trolley car and ride into Philadelphia in about forty five minutes and get connections to any place in the city. He could continue with his work in the city.


When I got off the trolley car with the children, I saw the small red brick library at the corner. The name across the front entrance read “Holmesburg Branch of the Philadelphia Library.” I was pleased that my children would have a place to borrow books.

On the other side of the street was a large fire station. We walked two blocks up the street and I saw the large white Victorian farm house in the distance. The house had a green open porch with lots of rockers and plants. I saw a large red barn to one side of the house and cows, horses and chickens were roaming about the place. I found out later that the Steinbergs were not truck farmers but raised and sold cattle.

They had two milk cows for their own use and also raised chickens for their eggs which they sold to the summer tenants. As we came up to the farm I saw a number of little girls come running out of the barn. We walked up to they porch and one of the children came forward and said,
“My name is Goldie. Do you want to see my mother?”
Just then I heard the door open and Mrs. Steinberg said,
“Come in Mrs. Benn. We have been waiting for you. Your husband is upstairs putting up the beds.”

I found out within the hour that this lovely looking house was lacking in all modern conveniences. The house was divided by a large center hallway with a winding stairway leading up to the third floor. The Steinbergs lived in one side of the house and rented the other side to us. The third floor rooms were rented to the summer tenants. Oar quarters on the first floor consisted of one very large room, which must have been the parlor years ago. Mr. Steinberg had put in a large black iron coal stove in one end of the room, with one pipe leading outside and a large hole in the ceiling directly above the stove which would serve to heat the large bed-room in the winter.

There was a sink in the room but it had no water spigots; just a drain pipe leading to the outside. Abe explained to me that there was a water pump on the back porch just outside our door and this was our water supply. There was no bathroom in the house. The outhouse was a short distance away about one hundred feet in back of the house. Abe assured me that it was kept very clean. He had checked. He said that Mr. Steinberg also gave him two chamber pots to be put under our beds.

The rooms were lit by kerosene lamps. I asked Abe how was I to bathe the children. Abe said,
“No trouble, we will buy a large tin tub, heat the water on the stove, add some cold water and put all three children in the tub together. You can bathe the same way. I’ll go to the bath house on Fridays after work.

Abe had placed the table and chairs near the stove. The brown lounge was placed at the front of the long room. Cartons of our household goods stood in the middle of the floor. I went to investigate the upstairs bedrooms. The front room which was fairly large had an open fireplace and four large windows, two in the front of the room and two on the side. The double brown iron bed stood against one wall and Minnie’s crib was placed near by. Our large bureau was placed between the two side windows. There was a doorway leading into our bed-room. It was a very small room. Our brass bed and bureau and the rocker filled the entire space. It had one window on the side of the wall. I was upset.
“Abe”, I said, “1 knew farm houses lacked some modern conveniences, but this” and I waved my arms, “I didn’t expect.”

Just then Mrs. Steinberg appeared at the door and said,
“Mrs. Benn, I want you and your family to have supper with us tonight.”
I thanked her and accepted. In silence I started to unpack the dishes. Abe started to bring in the water and get the coal stove started. After awhile Abe said,
“Etta, give it a chance, you may even get to like it here.”

That evening we went across the hallway to have dinner with the Steinbergs. Mr. Steinberg, who we soon called Morris, was an intelligent and jolly man. He was of medium build, with light brown hair, blue eyes and rather plump. Anna, his wife, was short thin, with a pretty face and blonde hair. Of their four daughters, Goldie, age eight, and Irene, age six, were blonde, blue eyed beauties. Their sisters, Edie, age five, and Sally, age two, were brunettes with large brown eyes and equally as beautiful as their blonde sisters. They were not shy children and immediately made friends with my daughters. At least, I thought, one good thing in living here, my daughters will have lovely playmates. After dinner another couple came to call on us. We were introduced to Mr. and Mrs. Martin Steinberg. The Stein­berg brothers had married two sisters. The younger Steinbergs lived in a smaller farm house a short distance from the barn and they had one daughter, Esther, a beautiful dark haired child of seven years of age. I noticed that she was expensively dressed in a pink silk smocked dress and wore a gold locket around her neck. The brothers were partners and ran the farm together.

The children, all eight little girls, went across the hallway to our place and Gertrude brought out her dolls and they played house. Even though I was disappointed with our living quarters I knew Abe had made a wise choice. I liked the Steinbergs immediately. They were down to earth friendly people and their children won my heart.

There was very little housekeeping to do and I got plenty of rest as the doctor had ordered. The spring was unusually warm and we were outside in the fresh air and sunshine for hours at a time. My health started to improve and I at last lost that hacking cough. My daughters gained weight and their cheeks became rosy red.

In June, when school let out, the first of the summer tenants started to arrive and the four bed-rooms on the third floor were rented. The large back porch with the wooden tables and kerosene stove became the community kitchen for the use of the summer tenants. Once a week Mr. Steinberg would hitch up his wagon, put wooden benches in the back and we ladies would pile in and. he would take us to a farm market. I also gave Abe a list and he would do some of the food buying in the city after work.
Pennypack Park with a picturesque creek and waterfall was located just one mile from the farm. We used to go picnicking and bathing there quite often on warm sunny days.

One hot day in July, we women got together, packed picnic baskets and with the children walked over to the park. We spread our cloths on the wooden tables, put our baskets on top, and then went into the bushes to change into bathing suits.
]
We had a joyous time splashing in the water with the children. We ate, sat around, and. talked while the children played hide ­and go seek. We realized the hour was getting late and told the older children to gather up all the youngsters and start for home while we would clear the tables and put the trash in the park receptacles.

When I got home I saw Ethel and Minnie playing on the front porch with some of the other children. I did not see Gertrude but I was not concerned as I thought she was playing somewhere else with her friends Goldie and Esther. Abe came home and I called the children in for supper. Gertrude did not appear. I questioned the women on the back porch preparing their meal and then went across the hallway to Mrs. Steinbergs.

Nobody had remembered seeing Gertrude! The older children couldn’t remember if she had left the park with them. I became panicky. Abe rounded up all the men and they started to run to the park. I couldn’t stay home and some of the women joined me and we also started running towards the park. As I was running I kept praying,
“Please God, don’t let her fall into the deep part of that creek.”
I could hear the men shouting her name as we entered the park. Abe was telling us to separate and go in different directions. I guess it was only ten or fifteen minutes when Mr. Steinberg came across Gertrude sleeping peacefully under a large tree near the creek. He picked her up in his arms and started to shout glee­fully,
“Here she is! Here she is!” He brought her to me, Gertrude was wide awake by this time, and she could not understand why I was crying and all those men and women standing about laughing and looking so relieved. After that, I kept a close watch on my girls and all the women made sure all the children were accounted for before we left the farm or returned from our outings.

I enjoyed the company of the summer tenants. We use to sit on the porch and tell stories about the homeland and our adventures in coming to America. We also sang all the o1d Yiddish folk songs and discussed politics, books, and our hopes for the future. We would let the children stay up late in order that they too enjoy watching the beautiful sunsets and see the glorious stars glittering in the heavens. Living in the narrow streets of Philadelphia we missed all this beauty of the skies. We even loved the violence of the storms. As we sat on the porch and as the lightning would flash across the skies we would shout,
“Look at that one!” and wait for the sound of the thunder. The louder the sound, the more we enjoyed it. As a result, our children grew up never fearing lightning or thunder and always appreciating the beauty of the sunsets.

Summer was over all too soon and the summer tenants left and we missed them. I enrolled Gertrude and Ethel in the country school. It was a two story red brick building with twelve rooms and quite modern. It had replaced the one room school house a few years ago. Even though my daughters were speaking English in school they spoke Yiddish to me in the house.
Mr. Steinberg went to a country auction one day and brought home an old baby grand piano in his wagon. That excitement that day! Goldie started to take music lessons from her teacher in school.

Gertrude would sit by the piano and watch Goldie practice. She wanted a piano of her own. I promised her that as soon as we moved back to the city we would buy her one.

It was an unusually cold winter. The snow piled up high against the house and barn. I remember the day the water pump froze on the back porch and we could not get any water. We filled the buckets with snow and melted it on the stove. The men kept pouring hot water over the pump until the ice finally melted. The snow was so high that the school closed down for a few days. Abe found an old broken sled in the barn. He repaired the slates and sharpened the runners and what fun he and the children had with that sled! He’d put the children on the sled and pull them along the path. Other times he would go belly flopping down the hill with one of the children lying on his back with their arms around his neck.

He helped them build snow men and forts. They would stand behind the fort and throw snowballs at him. He would pretend to be wounded and call for help and when the girls would come out from behind the fort to help him. He would get up in a hurry and rub snow in their faces. The girls would run screaming up to the porch. I use to watch them from the window and I thought Abe was just as young in spirit as the children.

Mr. Steinberg owned a large sled. After his chores were done, he would hitch up the horse, and we and the children would pile in and we would head for Pennypack Park. The sleigh bells would be ringing, the children would be singing, and the scenery along the bridle path was like a fairy land. The snow covered bushes, the icicles hanging from the trees, the sun glittering on the ice caps in the creek, thrilled one with the beauty of nature.

The nights were so cold that I used to fill bottles with hot water and Abe would take them upstairs to the bedrooms and roll the bottles over the bed linens to warm them. We would carry the children upstairs and put hot water bottles to their feet and cover them with heavy quilts. In spite of the fact that it was usually thirty degrees in the bedrooms the children never caught cold that winter.

It was springtime again and the children would bring me small bouquets of wild flowers and the Steinbergs were once more preparing the house to receive the summer tenants. Abe wanted to buy a dilapidated old farm house down the road but I vetoed the idea. I wanted one of the new modern houses with electricity, hot and cold running water and a gas range. Abe started to search for a house in the city and one day he came home and said that if I approved of the house he had selected we would be moving at the end of August.

The Steinbergs said they were sorry to see us move and Gertrude and Goldie promised to remain friends their entire lives, and strangely enough, they did.


Chapter Nine
BAILEY STREET
Abe led me down a narrow tree lined shaded street. The red brick row houses had open front porches all painted different colors. Each house had rocking chairs and swings all decorated with colorful cretonne pillows. The steps leading up to the porches were bordered with redbrick that divided into two oblong platforms which had white stone flower boxes upon them. Each house had a different assortment of flowers and plants growing in the boxes. The street was clean and a few young children were roller skating in the street. This street had a charm all of its own and I hoped that I would also like the house. Abe stopped at the middle of the block in front of an empty house badly in need of painting. We went inside and there was a hallway leading from the front door back to the kitchen with doorways leading into the parlor and. dining rooms. There were three bedrooms upstairs, one large, one medium, and. one very small one and a modern bathroom. There was a basement with a coal heater and. two built in wash­tubs. The wooden enclosed back yard was small and there was a plot of grass and a red, rambler rose bush climbing over the fence.

I said,
“Abe, I like the street but this house is so small and so dingy looking.” Abe said,
“Etta, if we buy this house, I will knock out the hallway, This will enlarge the parlor and dining room and I will build an arch way between the two rooms and this will let in more light. I will also build a new staircase and rip up these old floors and replace them with hardwood. You can select the new wall paper and lighting fixtures. I will paint the woodwork white. When I get through remodeling this house, it will look entirely different. Leave it up to me. I know you will like
it.” The price was reasonable, $4000.00, and the down payment was small. Abe and I walked over to the real estate office and signed the papers. It took my husband just three weeks to remodel the house. We took the rest of our furniture out of storage and moved in the second week in September.

Abe was right. He did a wonderful job of remodeling and the interior of the house was charming. My cousins Morris Miller and his family were my first guests and they were pleased with our new home. Sarah called it a doll house. The very next week I enrolled Gertrude and Ethel in the John Greenleaf Whittier public school.

I was busy putting my house in order and Minnie was no trouble. She pulled a chair up to the electric light switch and stood there most of the day pushing the buttons off and on. This was the first time in her life that she lived in a house with electricity and she was fascinated.

Gertrude reminded me of my promise to buy her a piano when we moved to the city. I suggested to Abe that we purchase a good second hand piano. My husband didn’t go along with my suggestion. He felt that if we bought a good new piano Gertrude would have it for the rest of her life. We put a down payment on a new upright Cunningham piano, cost of $500.00, and arranged for time payment for the next two years. It was the first thing we ever bought, outside of our houses, on credit.
I hired a music teacher who came to the house once a week and Gertrude practiced the piano one hoar each day after school. Ethel also became interested so now both of my daughters were taking lessons. Their teacher, an old Jewish man by the name of Mr. Pincus, used to give then duets, so after each girl had put in one hour f practice, they would practice the duets together for another hour. This made a total of three hours of playing the piano each day. I enjoyed their practicing. I had dreams of my daughters becoming great concert stars.

Next door, to my right, where the piano stood against the party wall, lived a widow and her two children. Mrs. Russell came in one day and said,
“Mrs. Benn must your daughters practice three hours every day? Their practicing is driving me crazy! I’m almost tempted to get Amelia a trumpet and Jim a drum just to get even, but that would drive me completely insane!”
I told. Abe about Mrs. Russell’s complaint and said I thought she was jealous because my children had talent! Abe, to my surprise said,
‘tMaybe she does have a valid complaint. Ask the girls not to use the loud pedal so much and trying using the soft one for a change.”

Mrs. Russell moved out before very long, and we didn’t have any trouble with the new neighbors. The young couple went to work each day and his mother who lived with them was deaf.

Abe and I enjoyed listening to almost any kind of music. One evening my husband came home carrying a large square carton. We all gathered around him with shouts of What is it? What is it? Abe slit open the carton and he lifted out d out a small square table model Victrola.

He had also purchased a few records. We could hardly get the children to eat their dinner. I didn’t even wash the dishes and we went into the parlor. Abe proceeded to crank the Victrola, put on a record, adjusted the arm which held the needle and suddenly we had beautiful music. The first recording played was “Columbia the Gem of the Ocean” and it became one of our favorite songs and we played it every night. Abe also bought a few Strauss waltzes, a Caruso record., and a few Yiddish folk song recordings. Each night after the dishes were done and the girls had finished their practicing on the piano, Abe would crank up the Victrola and we would dance and sing to the tunes.

My husband was again in the contracting business. None of the private homes had a telephone. On the corner of our street was a small candy shop run by an old couple Mr. and Mrs. Scott. There was a telephone in the store (not even a coin operated one) which was placed on a small wooden table with a chair beside it. When people came in to use the telephone they would give Mr. Scott five cents and also felt obligated to buy something, candy, ice cream or cigarettes. If it was an incoming call Mr. Scott would send one of the many small boys who were always hanging around the corner and. eager to run and call the party to the telephone as this meant a two cent tip. A heavy tipper would give the boy three or four cents. Again the person felt obligated to buy something from Mr. Scott. This little store did a thriving business.

My husband was making a good many calls and was receiving quite a few also. One evening Mr. Scott said to my husband,
“Mr. Benn you are tying up my telephone for to long a time and it isn’t fair to my other customers.“
My husband felt insulted as Abe bought all of his cigarettes from Mr. Scott and Abe being a chain smoker bought quite a few packs each week. He came home in a huff and said,
“Etta, get Mrs. Henry (our next door neighbor and an American born citizen) to take you down to the Telephone Company and ask them to install a telephone in our house.”
He told me what had transpired between him and Mr. Scott. Abe said,
“Now that my anger has subsided, I realize that Mr. Scott is right. I am a business man and should have my own telephone in the house.”

Mrs. Henry took me down to the telephone company and in a few days our telephone was installed. Our neighbors started to use our telephone (as it didn’t cost them anything) and they were not obligated to buy any sweets. I am afraid that Mr. Scott lost some business.

When someone had to be called to the telephone I always sent Minnie. She was always available and happy to call the people as she also received a two or three cent tip. Minnie was saving these pennies and when she had saved enough she was going to buy her own Mama doll and coach. I had never bought Minnie a doll of her own as Gertrude and Ethel had a few beautiful china dolls and I expected the girls to share their toys. Every few days Minnie would empty the jar and her sisters would help her count her pennies. I realized it was going to take her a long time to save up for that doll and coach.

Our Hanukah holiday was coming in December about the same time as Christmas. Each year the children would light the candles for eight days and Abe would give each child a ten dollar gold piece. At the end of the holiday Abe would say to the girls,
“You better give me back the gold pieces as you may lose them and I will save them for you.”

Abe was friendly with a Mr. Fox, who ran a hardware store nearby and this year for the first time Mr. Fox was going to sell electric trains and a complete line of toys. He asked Abe to build the platform in the window so he could display the trains. Abe finished the job and when Mr. Fox asked him what he wanted to be paid, Abe said,
“A mama doll, a coach and two pairs of roller skates.”

On the first day of Hanukkah, after the children lit the first candle, Abe presented the toys to them. I’11 never forget the look of surprise, love and happiness as Minnie hugged her very own doll. The next day she proudly walked up and down the pavement showing off her coach and doll to the other little girls.

Abe jokingly said to me,
“Etta, would you like a new mama doll of your own?” I said,
“No thank you, but I do wish you would buy me a washing machine.”
I use to boil Abets work clothing in a large copper kettle and then wash our other clothes and linens in the tub in the cellar on the washboard. It always took me the greater part of the day to wash and hang the clothes on the lines and I, like most women, hated wash days which always left me exhausted. Abe said,
“Etta, I think that’s a great idea. On Saturday we will go to the Electric Company and buy you an electric washing machine.”
We were the first family on Bailey Street to own one and it caused quite a sensation. The ABC washing machine was a large round tub, copper on the outside, and galvanized iron on the inside. In the center was an iron post and suspended from this post were three large steel cups, which went up and down and around. This motion cleaned the clothes. A rubber hose connected to the water spigots and another hose at the bottom of the tub allowed the water to run in and out as required. The wringer was attached to the side of the washer. We hand fed the clothes into it and they dropped out on the other side into a rinse tub of water. We then fed the clothes back into the wringer from the rinse tub and they fell into the wicker clothes basket. I remember always being a little afraid of getting my hands caught in that electric wringer. One by one my neighbors came in to try my machine and they also convinced their husbands to buy them one.

A few weeks later, Abe came home and presented me with an electric iron. This, I told. Him, I didn’t need or want. My two flat irons were all that I needed for ironing. The truth of the matter was that I was afraid of being electrocuted. Abe said.,
“Lift it! It’s just one half of the weight of your flat irons and you have a more even heat and it will save you time in getting your ironing done.”

Abe took a pillowcase out of my clothes basket and proceeded to demonstrate the ease in which you could iron. I called in my neighbors and they also tried it. It took me a few weeks before I got enough courage to put away my flat irons and use the electric iron each week.

Early in June I received a letter from my sister Ethel, saying that she and her two youngest children, Anna age 8, and Lawrence age 4, were coming to visit us in July and would stay a few weeks. Anna and Lawrence were born in Milwaukee when Ethel’s husband Isaac, was in partnership with my brother Jake in the second hand furniture business. Unfortunately, Isaac had a heart attack, and the doctor advised him to seek a milder climate in which to live. He had cousins that lived in New Orleans and wrote to them asking about the possibilities of opening a business in their city. They told him to come ahead and my brother-in-law opened a dry goods store and made a very good living. I could hardly wait for my sister and the children to arrive. We had been separated for fifteen years.
Morris Miller, our cousin, picked up Ethel and the children at the train station in his automobile. What a reunion that was! Ethel’s children and mine hit it off immediately. Abe and I took the back bedroom, we put my sister in the small bedroom with the single bed and we put Gertrude and Anna in the big brass bed in the front room. Ethel, Minnie and Lawrence were bedded down on the floor in the front room at the foot of the brass bed. When we walked into the front bedroom the next morning all the children were sleeping together on the floor.

Our cousin Morris and his wife invited us to spend a week with them in Bristol.
Can you imagine anyone inviting two women and their five children to spend a week at their home in those times? We all had a wonder­ful time. Ethel and I would help Yetta prepare the meals and wash the dishes while the children played in the large back yard or peeped into the boxes in the general store and Morris never seemed to mind the children being in the store.

I also took a ferry boat and crossed the Delaware River to Burlington Island which con­tained a picnic area and an amusement park. We all went bathing in the river (it was clean enough in those days) and after our picnic we took the children to the merry-go-round which they enjoyed very much. The vacation at Bristol was over all to soon but we enjoy­ed the ride home in Morris’s automobile.

On sunny days we would pack a picnic basket and take the children to Fairmount Park. Ethel and I would sit under the trees talking, reading or knitting and the children would run about playing ball or some other of their childish games. Each Friday night there was a band concert in the park and we never missed one of them. Anna introduced my daughters to the movies. I never thought of sending my daughters to the Saturday matinees but Anna said she went every Saturday and wanted to continue seeing the movies. The Cambria movie house was just four blocks away so one Saturday we took all the children to the matinee. It was the first matinee my daughters attended, and my last one! The children in the movie house ran up and down the aisles. Small boys got into fist fights. Such laughter and screaming! There was more action going on in the movie house than what was being portrayed on the silent screen. I had no discipline problems with the children. All I had to say was if you don’t behave you cannot go to the movies on Saturday.

The summer ended all too quickly. I helped Ethel pack her suit­cases to return home. I went downstairs and asked Abe if I could give Ethel our Victrola as a going away gift. I said Ethel and the children loved the Victrola and I wanted them to have a remembrance of this happy summer. Abe agreed and packed the Victrola and the records immediately.

We took Ethel and her chi1dren by taxi to the train station. We helped Ethel get seated on the train with the suitcases and then she noticed the large box. When we told her what was in it, she said,
“No, I can’t accept this gift. You and. the children enjoy it so much.”
Abe assured her that he would buy us another one. We hugged each other and said our good-byes and promised to visit each other often.

Mr. and Mrs. Henry, our next door neighbors, were American born and had been married only two years. Dorothy, Frank, and Abe and I became very good friends. It was Dorothy who started to help me with my English.

Dorothy was what I called a modern dresser. She wore her hair in a short feather cut. Her dresses were short and of the latest flapper styles and she always were high heel pumps.

One day she said to me,
“Etta, you are really a pretty woman. Why do you continue to wear that long hair with that large bun in the back? It makes you look ten years older. Your dresses are much too long and old fashioned. High lace shoes shouldn’t be worn by a lady with as shapely legs as yours. Since Easter is coming and I know you will be getting some new clothes, let me take you down town and help you select an outfit.”

I spoke to Abe that evening and he thought it was a good idea. He handed me fifty dollars. The following Saturday Dorothy and I went shopping. She took me first to a beauty parlor. I had never been in one before. I thought only the rich could afford their services. The hairdresser cut my long hair and handed it to me wrapped in tissue paper in a white box. (After fifty years, I still have the hair and look at it from time to time.) The hairdresser next proceeded to cut and shape my hair into hat was then called a boyish bob. My head felt light and I liked my new modern look. Dorothy insisted that I buy some face powder and rouge. The hairdresser applied them to my face and when I looked in the mirror I felt like a movie actress. We walked over to Gimbel Brothers Department Store and I bought a short navy blue dress edged in white, a pill box navy blue hat with a bunch of red cherries hanging down the side, a princess styled navy blue coat with six large white bone buttons on the front of the coat, and a pair of navy blue pumps. A white pair of gloves and a white leather handbag completed my outfit.

Dorothy insisted that I wear my new clothes home so we had the saleslady wrap my old clothes in a large box. When I walked into the house with Dorothy, the children surrounded me with shouts of
‘”Mama, mama, you look so beautifu1”
I looked at Abe, and he was smiling broadly and said,
“Any lady that looks so grand should be taken out tonight.”
Dorothy immediately volunteer­ed to stay with the children. Abe took me downtown to a kosher restaurant and then we went to the Yiddish Arch Street Theatre. We sat downstairs and saw a lively musical comedy and after the show Abe took me to an ice cream parlor where I tasted my first sundae. I think this was one of the happiest days of my life.

A few days later Abe came home and handed me a blue silk box containing a string of pearls. I remembered the fake diamond earrings of long ago and
I said,
“Abe, are these real?” He said,
“Of course, and I’ll prove it to you.”
He put them on the floor and stood on them. In those days fake pearls were made with a wax base and standing on them would have crushed the strand. The pearls were not crushed or even dented. I was still doubtful so the next day I went around to the jeweler and told him that I wanted to have the pearls appraised. I told him they were a gift from my brother and I wanted to insure them. He looked at them through his eye piece and handed them back to me and said,
“These are the new synthetic pearls and I wouldn’t insure them if I were you. They can be bought at any department store for ten dollars a strand.”
I thanked him and left the store and was worried all day hoping that Abe hadn’t been taken over by a fast talking salesman. When he came home that night, I confronted him with the truth. He laughed and said,
“Etta, I guess I’ll never be able to fool you where jewelry is concerned” Abe continued, “But I want you to wear them with your new outfit. They really look genuine and I’ll bet nobody but a jeweler could tell them from the real thing.”

Frank and Abe use to sit on the porch during the summer and discuss politics. One day Frank said,
“Abe, who are you going to vote for in the coming election?t’ Abe answered,
“Frank, I can’t vote for anyone, I don’t have my second citizenship papers.”

Frank was flabbergasted. He said,
“Abe, do you mean to sit there and tell me that you have been in this country for sixteen years and are not yet a citizen? Do you expect to return to Russia with your family someday?”
“Heaven forbid,” said my husband, “It’s just that I have been too busy earning a living to bother.“ Frank said,
“Abe it’s important that you become citizen. Don’t you want to feel that you have a right to choose the men who will make our laws?”

Abe agreed and that week Frank brought Abe the necessary papers and questions he would have to learn to answer before he could get his citizenship. Gertrude who was in the sixth grade in school would sit down with her father each night and help him study American history and the make up of our government. Gertrude would act just like a little old stern school teacher and fortunately for Abe he learned his lessons quickly. In a short time Abe felt confident enough to apply for his examination. I remember Gertrude wore a new white eyelet cotton dress trimmed in pink, white high laced shoes, and I tied a big pink bow on to the back of her hair. Abe had his hair and mustache trimmed by the barber. He wore his blue suit, white shirt and a red neck-tie. They both looked like they were going to have their pictures taken.

I walked with them to the trol1ey and wished Abe good luck. I busied myself all morning in the kitchen trying not to think of what an ordeal Abe must be going through. Minnie spotted them coming down the street and ran in shouting, “Mama, mama, they’re back!”

I waited until Abe walked into the house and I could tell by the expression on his face that he passed his examination. Abe smiled and said,
“Your husband is now an American citizen and Gertrude not I answered all the questions.” I said,
“Abe, what do you mean?” He said,
“When my name was called, Gertrude and I walked up to the Judge’s bench. He asked me how many children I had, what kind, of work I did, and why wanted to be a citizen of the United States of America. After I answered him, he turned to Gertrude and started to quiz her on American history. Gertrude stood up straight and answered all the questions in a loud clear voice. The Judge would shake his head up and down after each of Gertrude’s answers and say,
”That’s right. That’s right.”
After he got through with Gertrude, he turned to me and said,
“Mr. Benn,, any man who raises a daughter who has such a knowledge of American history deserves to be a citizen of the United States of America. Congratulations!”

That evening we invited Frank and Dorothy Henry and some of our other neighbors into our house and we had a party. I prepared the food and Dorothy baked a cake and Abe brought up his best wine from the cellar. Gertrude played the piano and we sang all the popular tunes of the day.

Life was going along smoothly and suddenly the jolt came. Abe had just started to work on a new row of houses when he fell off the third story wooden foundation into the cellar. Fortunately he fell into a sand pile which saved his life. He did receive a badly sprained back and tore the ligaments in his right leg. The doctor said he would be laid up for at least eight to ten weeks.

Life was going along smoothly and suddenly the jolt came. Abe had just started to work on a new row of houses when he fell off the third story wooden foundation into the cellar. Fortunately he fell into a sand pile which saved his life. He did receive a badly sprained back and tore the ligaments in his right leg. The doctor said he would be laid up for at least eight to ten weeks.

I realized the work season would be over and we would have to deplete our savings in order to live that year. I decided to go to work. I couldn’t work eight hours in a factory as I had a sick husband, the children and a house to care for.

My next door neighbor, Mr. Katz was a customer peddler and advised me to sell children’s dresses door to door. In this way he said you can make your own hours and I am sure you will earn just as much as working in the factory. I went down to a wholesale house at Fourth and Market Streets and explained my situation to the boss. He said that he would let me have all the dresses I wanted and I could pay him after I sold them. I said,
“How come you will let me have the dresses without paying for them? Aren’t you afraid that I might abscond with them?” He said,
“Lady, I have been in this business for over thirty years, and I know an honest face when I see one.”

I would rise early in the morning, get my household chores done, prepare the food for the day, get the children off to school, and after I gave Abe his lunch, I would take Minnie and start to peddle the dresses until the supper hour. I did very well. I sold the dresses fifty cents cheaper than what the women could buy them for in the stores and they sent me to their neighbors and families. They even started to come into my house and buy other merchandise which I started to carry. I was earning an average of fifty dollars a week which was a good salary in those days.

Abe recovered in three months and went out and found another job. He asked me to quit my business as he felt that the husband should provide for his family if he were physically able. I agreed with him as I felt it was more important for me to be home when the children came home from school than continuing to make money. Sometimes I wonder how far and how successful I would have become if I had continued in the business world.

It was fall once more and the children were looking forward to Halloween. Mr. and Mrs. DeYoung, a child-less couple, lived directly across the street from us. Mr. DeYoung was a traveling salesman and was away for short periods of time. We didn’t see much of his wife as she would visit her large family during his absences. Although this couple lived very quietly, they were well known to all the children for blocks around..

Each Halloween the DeYoungs would decorate the outside of their house with a huge cut out pumpkin that lit up at night. Paper skeletons and witches riding on broom sticks were pasted on the front window and door. Mr. DeYoung would go to the bank and. bring back canvas bags filled with nickels. The DeYoungs would make up gaily colored packages of orange and black that contained candies, nuts, dates and a surprise toy. The girls’ bags were always orange colored and. the boys were given the black and orange bags. For the girls the toy was usually jacks and a small rubber ball, or a small doll, or a tin ring with a pretty colored stone. The boys’ packages contained marbles, balls or a toy water pistol. When Mr. DeYoung would come out to light the pumpkin about six o’clock and put on the front porch lights, that was the signal for the children to visit the DeYoungs.

Already there were fifteen or twenty children waiting patiently in line to get into the house. As soon as the first child entered I would permit my daughters to go across the street and also stand in line. All the children were dressed in homemade costumes as clowns, hoboes, gypsies, ghosts, etc. I always dressed my girls as gypsies. Dorothy would come in and rouge their faces and put her junk jewelry on them. The children told me that Mr. DeYoung would be sitting on one side of the dining room table and would ask each child his name and then hand him a nickel and a large Hershey bar of chocolate. Then they would walk around the table and Mrs. DeYoung would hand them the package. All the children went to the DeYoungs house first and then proceeded to knock on other doors.

We always gave out wrapped candies, but nobody could or would even try to compete with the DeYoungs. Many children (including my own) would stand in that line more than once and Mr. DeYoung would say,
“Weren’t you here just a little while ago?”
The child would hang his head and say nothing. Mr. DeYoung would say
“I must be mistaken. It was probably an­other gypsy” and again hand the child his nickel.

I and my children always looked forward to Halloween. It was just as much fun for the adults as it was for the children. I feel a sense of sadness when I read in the newspaper these days that children are given pills and other harmful articles at Halloween and their mothers have to accompany them for fear of injury.

Three weeks after Halloween Mr. DeYoung died suddenly. The news spread like wildfire for blocks around.

Our street was always alive with the noises of children skating, playing stick ball, hide-and-seek. There was no traffic in those days and the street was the children’s playground. After the news of Mr. DeYoung’s death and until after the funeral our street was strangely quiet. All the children, without being told, would leave the street and go around the corner to p1ay. The children on the other block accepted that as they too understood the reason for the invasion. On the day of the funeral my daughters asked me if they too could go and bid goodbye to Mr. DeYoung. I said to my husband,
“Don’t you think they are too young to attend a funeral?”
Abe said,
“No, the children have to learn that death is part of the life cycle.”

The viewing started at eleven o’clock that morning. I looked out of the front window and was surprised to see a line of young couples and their children going into the house. All day long right up to two o’clock until the time of the funeral the lines kept forming. We went into the house and Mr. DeYoung was laid out in the casket surrounded by baskets of flowers. He looked surprisingly young and as if he were sleeping peacefully. Mrs. DeYoung, dressed in black, was sitting beside the casket and as each person took her hand and said some words of sympathy, she would smile and say,
“I know that Mr. DeYoung would be so pleased to know that you came.”

I have often read in the newspapers about some important head of state dying and all the political figures from around the world attending the funeral, but somehow I think the tribute paid Mr. DeYoung that day was far greater because it came from the heart.

In the spring of 1924, Abe was building a showroom for a new Ford automobile agency. At the end of the job Mr. Ross told my husband to come around the end of the month and he would pay the $800.00 still due my husband.. On the last Saturday of the month Abe took Minnie and said that he was going to collect his money from Mr. Ross. I was wondering what was taking him so long in getting back home. Gertrude and Ethel had already left for the movies and I was sitting on the front porch when to my surprise Abe drives up to the house in a new Ford touring car.

Abe came up the steps with Minnie trailing behind and said,
“Etta, don’t say a word until I tell you the whole story. I walked into the showroom and Mr. Ross was busy talking to a customer. I walked around looking at the new cars. Then Mr. Ross got through talking to the customer he came over to me and said, ‘How do you like these Ford cars?’ Very much, I said. Someday I’ll probably buy one. Mr. Ross said, ‘Abe you don’t have to buy one, because you own this one!’ and he pointed to the car in front of me right now.
”What are you talking about? I asked. ‘Abe’ said Mr. Ross, I don’t have the money to pay you. I am just start­ing out in this business, but I can let you have this car for pay­ment of my debt.’ He went on to say, ‘Abe, you are a contractor and with a car you could get around quickly and not be limited to just one job at a time. You expand your business and I’ll guarantee you this car will pay for itself. Just think how much enjoyment your family and friends will have taking rides in this car.’
“I said but I don’t know how to drive a car. Mr. Ross said ‘I can teach you how to drive right now. It will only take an hour and I know you will be good enough at it to drive this car home.’ I left Minnie in the showroom as I didn’t want to endanger her life. I found it very easy to drive.
“This car has a self starter, newly invented this year and you don’t have to crank the car in order to get it started. Well, Mr. Ross said, sometimes you do, but not too often. Etta, I drove this car as fast as fifteen miles per hour and Mr. Ross said it can do thirty but I think ten miles per hour is fast enough to drive in the city.”

By this time a few neighbors and children were gathered around the car. There was only one other tam1iy that had a car on our street and he was an American born business man and rumored to be wealthy. Excitement ran high that afternoon. The children came home from the movies and Abe took all of us plus Mr. and Mrs. Henry for the first ride to Fairmount Park which lasted about one hour. He then proceeded to give the other neighbors and their children short rides. It was only on rare occasions that we went off in the car with our own family. There was always Abe and I and the children, another couple and their children.

In the front seat would sit Abe our driver, Minnie or Ethel in the middle and another husband with a small child on his lap. On the back seat would be me, my neighbor, Gertrude, and we usually held three small children on our laps. There was always anywhere from seven to ten people in the car. This was an open touring car and in the winter we use to put up the izen glass curtains to keep out the cold wind and rain. We used to see sedan cars driving by with the windows closed and we would say,
“How can those people ride in those enclosed glass boxes?”

Everyday when Abe brought the car home from work the girls would go out and dust it inside and out. Once a week Abe would with the help of his daughters wash and polish the car. I don’t think any car got more loving tender care than this Ford.

We had great adventures driving into the country side and many times getting lost. Abe sometimes would see how fast he could drive the car and would reach speeds up to twenty five miles per hour. I would start to shout,
“Slow down or we ‘ll all be killed.”

The one big adventure I clearly remember was our trip to Atlantic City, New Jersey with my sister-in-law Leah, her husband Saul, and their two small sons. Abe and Saul studied the maps and planned this trip weeks in advance. It was a hot summer’s day in July and Abe and I got up at four o’clock in the morning. We packed a large picnic basket, awakened the girls at five o’c1ock and had them dressed and ready to leave the house by five thirty. We drove over to my sister in law’s house in west Philadelphia by six o’clock and she had her picnic basket ready and the children dressed.

We all sat down for a quick breakfast and. left for the waterfront by seven o’clock. The Benjamin Franklin bridge had not yet been built and we had to cross the Delaware River by ferry boats. All the cars lined up on Delaware Ave. to get on to the ferry boats and cross the river. We were lucky that day. It only took one hour of waiting in line until our turn arrived to board the ferry boat. We were driving through Camden N.J. by eight thirty. We were driving along just fine when we got our first flat. In those days the tires were made so poorly that having two or three flats on a long trip of fifty miles was considered normal. Abe and Saul got out of the car, took out the repair kit, and proceeded to repair the flat tire and put the spare tire on the front wheel. In the meantime we all got out of the car and had a little refreshment and took a short walk to stretch our legs. Again we were lucky. That was the only flat we had going down to the shore.

We arrived at Atlantic City about l2:3O P.M. This was the first time that the children had seen the boardwalk, the beaches and ocean. Excitement ran high and the children wanted to go on the beach immediately. We found a bath house, changed into our bathing suits, took the picnic baskets out of the car, and we spent about three hours bathing in the surf and sunning ourselves on the beach. The children were busy digging in the sand, and, running in and out of the water. We lunched at the beach and afterwards made sure all of the trash was put into the receptacles provided for that purpose.

We left the beach, got dressed and took a walk along the boardwalk, looking into all those wonderful shop windows. Abe stopped in a store and bought our first box of salt water taffy. We left Atlantic City at six o’clock and had two flats on the return trip home. We ate our picnic supper during those stops. We reached the ferries at 10:30 P.M. and again we were lucky.

We only had to wait one half hour to board the boat. We arrived at Leah’s house at ll:30 P.M. and her sons were asleep. Abe and Saul carried them into the house and we left for home immediately. We arrived at our house by 12:00 o’clock and had to awaken the children. It was a glorious experience but Abe and I agreed that it was too exhausting to take such a long trip in one day. It was a few years and in another car before we tried it again.

Abe got a contract for the carpenter work to build thirty four houses in a section of the city called Feltonville. One part of Feltonville was quite old with lovely old row houses, front lawns and spacious back yards. The new houses being built bordered the old section. When the sample house was opened, Abe took us to see it. I liked it immediately.

The homes were large with all the very latest conveniences. One row of ten houses was facing a farm. Abe said that the city had bought the farm and was going to build a library facing the other street down the block. It was going to be surrounded by a square. Gertrude said,
“Papa, can’t we move into one of these new houses?” Abe looked at me and said,
“It’s up to your mother.” I grew used to our little house on Bailey street and was happy there but I realized that my girls were growing up, and I wanted them to have a beautiful home to bring their friends into. That night Abe and I discussed the buying of the new house and reached the conclusion that we could afford to buy one. The next day Abe told the builder that he was going to buy the end house facing the square.
Abe made some changes in the building. Our house was the only one to have a fireplace in the parlor and having extra ground on the side and back, he built a larger house. We also had a much larger plot of ground in the back. Abe built a white picket fence around the back of the house and in the following years cultivated that plot of ground into a lovely garden.


Chapter Ten
CITIZEN OF THE U.S.A.


It was September 1925 when we moved into our new home on Louden St. Abe told me to go ahead and buy whatever new furnishings I thought necessary to furnish the new house. I bought two matching royal Wilton wool rugs with a Persian design tor the living room and din­ing rooms. A new brown mohair living room set that had reversible cushions. One side was dark brown and. the other side had a beautiful design of autumn leaves and flowers of green, gold, rust and brown. The sofa was flanked by two mahogany end tables with china lamps. The upright piano stood against the staircase wall. A mahogany console table with a gold framed mirror above it stood at the foot of the staircase. We moved the Queen Ann dining room set from Bailey Street and it looked lost in that large room. A few years later we replaced it with a red mahogany 18th century Sheridan style dining room set. I bought an early American breakfast set for our new breakfast room. The kitchenette, which was the latest style, was a small room that contained only the sink, stove, and cabinets. We also had a small summer kitchen where we put our ice box. The breakfast room, kitchen­ette, and summer kitchen floors were covered with green and white squares of linoleum. I bought a four poster bed and bureau for the middle room, twin beds and two bureaus for the back room and we kept the walnut bedroom set we had purchasèd for ourselves in Bailey street for the front room. The living and dining room windows were draped in gold and blue damask with sheer gold net curtains underneath the drapes.

rest of the windows were draped in white lace panels. We brought our rockers and wicker flower baskets and placed them on the front porch. Abe built a back porch a few years later and we bought a glider to place on it.

We invited all of our family, friends and former neighbors to our house warming party a few weeks later. I baked an assortment of cookies, cakes and Abe bought all kinds of delicatessen, wines and liquors. The house was crowded with people and one of my husband’s nephews who brought along his girl friend to impress her with his rich Uncle said
“Unc1e Abe, I hope someday to have a home as lovely as yours and I hope I also have your bank account.” Minnie was stand­ing close by and said in her high pitched childish voice, loud and clear,
“My Pa told Mama not to buy anything more because he didn’t have any more money in his bank account.” A hush fell over the gathering and. I was so embarrassed that in a very loud voice I started to urge everybody to eat and. drink.

That night, after the guests had left, I went into Minnie’s room and had a long talk with her. I explained. to her that we did not discuss our personal problems or finances in front of anybody but our immediate family. After that incident Abe and I would speak in Russian (which our children couldn’t understand) if we wanted to discuss anything that we felt our children shouldn’t hear.


The house was large and Abe wanted me to have a cleaning woman once a week to help with the housework. A neighbor recommended her cleaning woman by the name of Daisy. Daisy was a Black woman, six feet tall, weighed I think over two hundred pounds, with the most beautiful large black eyes, white pearly teeth in a full mouth, and she wore her black curly hair In thick braids around her head.
Daisy was one of the most lovable, easy going, and honest women I ever met in my entire life. We became good friends. I would look forward to her arrival every Friday, not only to help me clean the house but for the companionship she gave me that day. Daisy had a shiftless husband who took advantage of her good nature. She worked hard to support her family of two small sons. Like all mothers, she had high ambitions for her sons, and during our lunch hour she would discuss her problems with me. One day I said to her,
“Daisy, why do you stay with your husband when he mistreats you and doesn’t support you?” She said,
“Mrs. Benn, I’m going tell you an old joke. I makes the living and he makes living real good.”
I never offered Daisy any advice after that remark.

One afternoon Abe came home early from work. He heard me and Daisy chattering away as we worked together. After Daisy left, Abe said,
“If you wouldn’t talk so much to Daisy, I’m sure she could get this house cleaned without your help.
”Abe”, I said, “1 don’t tell you how to treat your carpenters so don’t tell me how to treat Daisy.” Abe never interfered again.

Abe still had the Ford car which he used for work only. He bought a new blue Chevrolet four door sedan as the family car. He suggested that we take a ride to Atlantic City N. J. The Delaware River bridge was built, crossing the river no longer meant waiting in line for the ferries. The tires were also improved and Abe felt it shouldn’t be as difficult a trip as our first experience had been. It only took us three hours to reach the shore. We enjoyed walking on the boardwalk and the children said that they wished they could come here for a week or two during their summer vacation.

When school let out that June, Abe suggested that we drive down to Atlantic City and rent an apartment for one month. While Abe went swimming out in the ocean, I and. my daughters started to look for a place to rent. I remember looking at one apartment and pointing out to the landlord that the tub looked rusty, the curtains needed cleaning, etc, etc. He said,
“Lady, when I bought this place I didn’t examine it as closely as you are now doing. I think that a fancy lady like you better check into the Breakers Hotel.”
I left in a hurry and when we got outside we all burst out laughing. I finally saw a furnished apart­ment for rent sign in front of a newly painted house one half block from the boardwalk. I rang the door bell and an elderly lady opened the door and peeked out. I told her I came to inquire about the apartment. She opened the door wider, looked at my children and said,
“How many children do you have?” I said, “Just these three.” She said,
“I won’t rent to anybody with small boys.” She invited us in. I could see that the house was very old fashioned, furnished with antiques and spotlessly clean. She led us up to the third floor. The apartment had two spacious bedrooms, a white tile bathroom, and a large combination kitchen and living room. Leading from the kitchen was a small porch where you could see the ocean from that view.

All around us we noticed large signs hanging on the walls. Over the bathtub the sign read,
“Leave this bathroom as clean as you found it.” Over the stove the sign read,
“Clean this stove after each use. Don’t be a sloppy cook.” One sign read,
“We don’t tolerate loud talking or running about. Walk lightly.”

I immediately asked how much the rent was. I remember being surprised to find out how reasonable it was. She said, “Thirty dollars per week, or one hundred and ten dollars per month.” I gave her a deposit of thirty dollars and said that we would be coming down to stay for the month of July. When we got outside Gertrude said,
“Mother why did you rent that place? Didn’t you see all of those signs?” I said,
“Gertrude, those signs were put up to warn untidy housekeepers and noisy children, they don’t apply to us.” I was right, the two elderly sisters and I and the children became good friends.

My daughters would go walking on the boardwalk every morning while I did the food shopping, cooking and straightened out the apartment. We would have a picnic lunch on the beach and would go bathing and walking or just relaxing on the beach until 4:00 o’clock. When we left the beach and returned to the apartment we all took a bath, got dressed, and ate our supper. During the evening we would go walking on the boardwalk looking into all the wonderful shop windows with their displays of jewelry, paintings, furs, clothes, toys etc. There were a few auction houses on the boardwalk and I and the children used to go in, sit in the back of the store and watch with interest the different articles being auctioned. We would all gasp with excitement as the beautiful diamonds or art treasures were auctioned off. I never bid on anything but the excitement that ran thru the crowd was catching.
We also attended the organ and sing along concerts given by the Heinz’s Soup Company. They maintained a large pier over the ocean which was free to the public. They showed motion pictures about the growing and processing of their products.
They also gave out samples of their foods after each show. We tasted a lot of pickles that month. Sometimes we would just sit out at the edge of the pier and listen to the waves breaking against the pillars of the pier and look into the sky with the moon and the thousands of stars shining upon the ocean.

On rainy days (fortunately we had very few) I would pack a large brown paper bag with food and we would go tó the Steel Pier. Admission was fifty cents for adults, and. twenty fife cents for children. They had three movie houses, vaudeville shows, high wire and circus acts over the water, and displays of all kinds. There were booths where one could purchase soft drinks, candy and. ice cream. In the evening the large blue and gold ballroom would be opened and there was always a big name band playing dance music with one or two popular singers as an added attraction. The place would be filled with young couples and single people and elderly people just coming to watch the dancers and listen to the music. We got our money’s worth. We would enter the pier of lO:00 o’clock in the morning and never leave before 11:00 o’clock at night. About four or five times a week, before going to bed, we would go to the ice cream parlor on States Ave. and have banana splits. They cost fifteen cents a piece and consisted of three scoops of ice cream, one banana, lots of chocolate sauce with whipped cream and a red cherry on top. Surprisingly enough none of us gained any weight that month.

Abe used to drive down on Friday afternoon and stay until Sunday night. Summer was the building season and Abe would never take a week off.

On Saturday evenings it was our greatest pleasure to walk the boardwalk and then find. a bench in front of .a large hotel and watch the parade of well dressed people pass by. In those days people would put on their very best clothes to go walking on the boardwalk on Saturday night. The wealthy people coming out of the large hotels would be dressed in evening clothes. The women wore beautiful beaded and feathered siIk gowns of various colors and their shoes were dyed to match the gown. Most of them wore Spanish silk shawl embroidered with roses or other flowers and
the borders were heavily fringed with silk. They wore fresh flowers in their hair or corsages on their shoulders and their ­jewels added to the glitter of their outfits. The men were dressed in black silk tuxedos and some wore white jackets with their black trousers. They all had boutonnieres in their buttonhole on the lapels of the jacket. These couples were pushed along the boardwalk in large yellow wicker wheel chairs and we never got tired of watching the never ending parade.

Most people dress very casually today and I think some of the magic and happiness of wearing or even seeing others wear beautiful clothes has disappeared from our lives.

It was almost at the end of our vacation and I remember a cloudy day and decided not to let the children go on the beach that afternoon. We went walking instead and Minnie got tired. The girls walked on, with my instructions to return in about one half hour to the bench which we were seated on. A very expensively dressed young woman walked out of the Breakers Hotel and came and sat down beside Minnie. She started to talk and Minnie became very sociable.


I noticed the woman was heavily made up and was even wearing
lipstick. I was shocked to see that her fingernails were painted red. When she opened her pocketbook and took out a silver cigar­ette case and proceeded to open it, withdraw a cigarette, put it to her lips and lit it, that really shocked me. I yanked Minnie off the bench and proceeded to walk rapidly to the next pavilion. Minnie said,
“Mama, why did we leave that bench with that nice lady?” I said,
“Minnie, she is a bad woman and I didn’t want you sitting next to her or talking to her.” Minnie looked puzzled, and said,
“How do you know that she is a bad woman?” I said,
“Any woman that wears lipstick, paints her fingernails with red paint and smokes a cigarette is a bad woman and don’t you ever forget that.”

The children never did let me forget that. After a few years when I too started to wear lipstick and paint my fingernails red. The girls would tease me and say,
“Mother you are turning into a bad woman.”

The vacation ended all too quickly and we said our goodbyes to our landladies and promised to come back next summer. Unfortunately one of the sisters died and the other one moved away. We continued to spend our vacations in Atlantic City but somehow I always think back with nostalgia to that first summer vacation.


The girls were back in school and Daisy and I were busy doing the fall cleaning and I heard the postman ring oar bell. I went to the door and picked up the mail and I recognized the writing on the envelope as being my mother’s. I tore it open quickly and the letter read as nearly as I can remember as follows:


My dear daughter Etta:

I pray to God every day that you and your family will remain in good health. I have some very good news to tell you. Joseph, my son in law, who we all thought was killed by the Cossacks years ago returned to our village a month ago. Joseph told us that as he was returning home from his business trip that tragic day. He stopped at an inn to have a bite to eat and drink. His neighbor also happened to stop at the inn and told Joseph of the tragic news of Joseph’s entire family being killed and the house and grain mill being burned to the ground. Joseph said that after he got over the shock he decided that there was no reason for him to return to the village.

With the money he had earned on that trip, he left Russia and settled in Palestine. After a few years he remarried and now had two small sons. He opened a restaurant in Jerusalem and was making a fair living. Just a few short weeks ago, one of the Russian villagers came into his restaurant and they both recognized each other. Joseph discovered that his youngest daughter Kate was alive and living with me. He said that he and his wife had talked things over and decided that the best future for Kate was with him and his family. He also said that he was sure that Palestine would become a Jewish State and held a bright promise for all Jews living there.

I was again saddened at having to see my granddaughter leave, but I realized that I was an old woman, and it was more important for Kate to have the love and protection of her father and get to know her half brothers. I pray that Joseph’s wife will love Kate as much as I do. Rachel has been given a position as a school teacher in one of the new large modern schools in Kiev. We have moved to a comfortable two room apartment and she is a good daughter to me. Rachel has been courted by a young doctor and he has asked her to marry him. They plan to marry in the spring. My children in America have been most generous to me and now I ask you to make one old mother happy. I would like very much to give Rachel a dowry of three hundred dollars. If you, Jake and Ethel could each send one hundred dollars you would gladden the heart of your mother. My best regards to your husband and kiss the children for me.

Your loving mother

Riva Bellatchaikovsky


I showed the letter to Abe when he came home that evening. He said he was willing to give Rachel one hundred dollars as a wedding gift. I sent letters to my sister Ethel and Jake. Within a week’s time both of them sent me a cheek for one hundred dollars. I. sent the money off to my mother and received a tear stained letter from her expressing her gratitude and. her sadness that we would not be attending Rachel’s wedding.

I received a letter from my brother Jake in Milwaukee and. he wrote that he was recovering from a serious operation and although we could not travel to Russia to visit mother, he felt that I could and should visit him and his family.


When Abe came home that night I told him about my brother’s letter and said that I wanted very much to visit him. Abe said,
“I can’t get away right now, but there’s no reason for your not going. The girls are old enough to run this house for a week without your help and I will be home every night.” Abe also felt that I needed some new clothes. He bought me a light brown Karakul fur coat, a gold lame cloche hat, several new dresses and shoes, plus an expensive suitcase. He also surprised me by taking me into the jewelry store and buying me a diamond ring. I guess Abe wanted my brother to know just how successful he had become. I wrote to my brother telling him the day, the time, and the name of the train that I would be arriving on. It was a snowy day and Abe and the girls saw me off on the train. It was the first time I had ever left my family to take a vacation, and the pangs of guilt feelings as I waved goodbye from the train window.

The trip took over twenty hours and I arrived feeling excited but fatigued. Then I got off the train I started to look for my brother. I walked up and down the platform looking closely at the people milling about. Everywhere I heard shouts of greetings but it soon became apparent to me as the station slowly cleared of people that nobody was here to meet me. I grew apprehensive; maybe my brother never received my letter or perhaps something had happened on the way to the train station that prevented his meeting me. I called a taxi, and in a few minutes we drove up to a large two family house that was in total darkness.

I asked the taxi driver to wait. I had decided that if no one was home I would check into a hotel that night and try to contact some member of the family in the morning.


Just as I was ringing the door bell I heard a car drive up and heard my brother saying,
“Here she is.” Jake paid the taxi driver and we all went into the house. Jake put the light on and we both realized that we had seen one another at the railway station but hadn’t recognized each other.
“Jake” I said, “Have I changed so much in twenty years?”
“Of course”, he said, “Twenty years ago you were still a young slip of a girl, and now you are a beautiful grown woman with short hair and fancy clothes. I wasn’t looking for such a richly dressed flapper.

Jake had gotten very thin. His last illness had aged him beyond his years. No wonder I didn’t recog­nize this thin grey headed man as my brother. I learned that Jake had been in poor health most of his life here in Milwaukee and his wife Dora had become a customer peddler to help earn their living. Jake had never written to me saying that it would be a hardship for him to send our mother money.

In spite of their limited income they raised a fine family. His oldest son Joseph became a dentist and. had just opened his own office which he proudly showed me that week. Mary, Jake’s oldest daughter was married to a very fine young man, who earned his living as a pharmacist and owned his own drug store. They had one small adorable two year old son who we all called Dicky and who was the apple of my brother’s eyes.

His youngest son Isadore graduated high school but wasn’t interested in going on to college. He had a vivacious personality and was doing quite well earning his living as a salesman. Ethel, the youngest daughter was attending teacher’s college. She played the piano beautifully and was an attractive and bright girl.


I said to Jake,
“Maybe you didn’t succeed in earning that fortune you came to seek in America, but you and Dora did raise a family to be proud of and that’s more important than gold.”

My sister in law and brother did not go to work that week. They took me around to meet all of our relatives and every night there was a party at someone’s house with at least fifteen to twenty five people in attendance. The week flew by and once again my brother was seeing me off to the train. We said our goodbyes and promised each other that we would visit one another often.

My Gertrude graduated from Frankford High School in February 1929. We had the house redecorated. I bought two new American oriental rugs for the living and dining rooms. We had the living room set reupholstered in blue frieze and I also bought new white marble lamps for the end tables. We bought new drapes and curtains for the entire house. Abe bought Gertrude a beautiful French provincial bedroom set. We also bought our first radio. It was a Zenith cabinet radio, the latest model with a loud speaker. We gave a party to celebrate her graduation, and we invited all our relatives and friends and our daughters’ friends. Everybody from six to sixty ate, danced, sang and helped us celebrate this joyous occasion.

Gertrude entered Temple University that same month. Abe was doing well and he never questioned me about the money I was spend­ing to outfit Gertrude for college. I bought her a raccoon fur coat and every Saturday my daughters and I would go downtown and shop for clothes in the department stores.

The closets were packed tight with new dresses, shoes, hats etc. Abe use to enjoy our coming home from our shopping sprees and modeling all of our new clothes for him.

In October 1929 1 read about the stock market crash, and heard the reports on the radio but it didn’t worry me as I knew that my husband never played the stock market and all of our savings were (so I thought) safely in the bank.. It wasn’t until I read about the runs on the banks and the closing of banks that I became apprehensive. I spoke to Abe about withdrawing our savings and putting them in government bonds but Abe assured me that the banks he did business with were sound..

Abe came home early on a Friday in May of 1930 looking pale and excited and asked me how much cash I and the girls had in the house. I said,
“Abe, what in the world do you want to know that for? It’s such a small amount. What’s happened?” Abe sat down at the table, put his elbows on the table and put his head between his hands and said,
“Etta, we are ruined. All the banks that I do business with and which have our savings have closed their doors. Even the builders’ banks have closed. I can’t even meet the payroll today. The only money we have to live on is what cash I have on me and what cash you and the girls have in the house. I couldn’t believe my ears. I emptied my pocketbook. I ran up­stairs and emptied the girls’ banks and counted nickels, dimes, and quarters. The total cash we had on hand was $104.50.
“Abe”, I said, “Call your sister and I will call my cousins. Maybe they can give us a loan. I’m sure the banks must open again in a few days and all this will be straightened out.”

We learned quickly enough that nobody could help us. It seemed that everybody was strapped for money. In fact the relatives we called said that they were going to call on us for help. The next few weeks were like a nightmare. I had to tell Daisy that I couldn’t afford to have her work for me.
“Mrs. Benn,” she said, “I’ll come and work for you for nothing, when Mr.. Benn goes back to work he can pay me back then.”
“Daisy” I said, “I can’t even afford to pay your carfare. When Mr. Benn goes back to work and we can again afford to pay your wages, I promise you Daisy, I will call you back to work, if you are still available.” We parted tearfully.

Gertrude had to leave college and started to look for a job. The music lessons stopped at once. Abe tried to get any kind of carpenter work, but people had no money to spend on repairs and. the building trade came almost to a complete halt. There was no unemployment insurance in those days. Abe started to look for any kind of work. He finally found a job unloading bananas (with the pull his nephew Morris Barsky exerted as he was a wholesale fruit dealer) from the ships coming in from South America at three dollars a day. He could only obtain work for three days a week. Our neighbors were going on relief and I told Abe about it. My husband said that he would rather be dead then ask for charity. It was considered a disgrace in those days to be on relief. Fortunately Gertrude found a job with Sears Roebuck & Co. in the legal department and started to earn fifteen dollars per week. She turned her pay envelope over to me each week and I gave her three dollars for carfare and. spending money.

That twelve dollars plus the few dollars Abe earned was what we lived on that year. I, like thousands of other women, learned how to feed our families on inexpensive but nourishing foods. To this day my daughters like their hamburger made with lots of bread crumbs and Minnie won’t eat peanut butter. I guess I packed too many peanut butter sandwiches in her lunch bag.

We didn’t have the money to meet our mortgage payments that year and we were afraid of having our house foreclosed. This fear haunted me at night when I tried to sleep. All around us people were being forced to leave their houses. Then a house became vacant it was usually vandalized within a month. People came and ripped up the floors for firewood. They would remove the bathroom fixtures and sell them to the junk yard for a few dollars. They even removed the copper pipes a. sold them to the junk man. The houses became shells and were considered almost worthless. Abe wrote to the people holding our mortgage and. asked them to send someone around to see us. Fortunately the mortgage was held by the Presbyterian church and they sent two of their elders to talk to us. Abe told them that as soon as he found steady work he would pay back all the interest due and would try to reduce the mortgage. I showed them thru the house and we kept the place in excellent condition. Abe continued to work in our garden and it was lovely.
The gentlemen to our relief said that they wanted us to continue to live in the house and would not foreclose on our mortgage. They said they knew Abe would pay his debt as soon as possible and it would also be to their benefit to have people living in the house who took such good care of the property. They only asked that we pay the city property tax on time. We thanked them profusely and for the first time in months I fell asleep without the fear of being evicted.

In spite of the depression young people found ways to enjoy themselves. My daughters and their friends would have gatherings in their homes each weekend.. They would roll back the rugs and dance to the music on the radio. They would. gather around the piano and sing the current hit songs. They would play cards, chess, talk about the movies and politics. There was a free library just down the block and. my girls became avid readers. Most of the museums were free and they took advantage of the culture these places had to offer and would visit them often. They joined a hiking club and would come home on Sunday night fall of stories about their adventures. When the girls and boys went out on dates it was usually “Dutch Treat” as most of the boys that were working and helping to support families couldn’t afford to spend money on dates. I remember those wonderful movies of the thirties. No matter how little money we had, we always managed to save a quarter to see one movie each week. Those wonderful gay musicals, the romantic love stories, the mystery stories that kept us on the edge of our seats, the travelogues, each movie was an escape from the harsh realities of life and was a balm to our troubled spirits. Ethel graduated high school and after working part time as a sales­girl in the five & ten cent store she finally after one year of job hunting found employment as a bookkeeper with an advertising agency. She earned ten dollars per week. She gave me five dollars for board and kept the rest for herself. Minnie tried to find work after school bat was unsuccessful. I used to give her twenty five
cents a week for ice cream and she hoarded it in order to save enough money to buy her class ring and yearbook. She would take the sandwiches and fruit I gave her and never complain.

In May 1933 her class was going to take a trip to the Academy at West Point, N.Y. at a cost of four dollars for the trip. Minnie had saved the four dollars but wanted to get a permanent wave for graduation. She asked me to give her the extra four dollars to make that trip but I told her she would have to make a decision, the trip or the permanent wave as I couldn’t afford to spend money on luxuries. Minnie, being of a practical nature, decided to have the permanent wave as it would last for months and the trip would be over in one day.

Minnie got her permanent wave and she was very disappointed. Her hair was always baby fine and the hair when waved instead of being soft and curly was a mass of frizz. Her friends stopped over to the house that morning to see if she by some chance was also going on the trip with them. When they left Minnie went up to her room and I could hear her sobbing. After one hour when I still heard her crying I went upstairs and entered her room. I sat on the bed and said,
“Minnie, dry your tears. The world is not coming to an end just because you didn’t go on that trip. I know you are disappointed but in one’s lifetime we are called upon to make many decisions. Unfortunately, we are not smart

enough to always make the right decision. If possible we try to cannot

rectify our errors, if we cannot, we should be smart enough to 1earn by

them.

Now dry your eyes, there is a ten cent matinee at the movies today and they are showing a new musical. Let’s you and I go.”

Minnie sat up in bed and threw her arms around me and said,
“Mother, I love you. You are always so understanding.”

I hear many commentators say that the depression of the thirties was a good thing. It taught the people the value of a dollar and how to live simply. I disagree with them. I saw how it de­graded good men as they looked for work and couldn’t find any, and couldn’t support their families. It had an adverse effect on the characters of many young people. Even though they became successful later in life, the depression always left them with a feeling of insecurity and their children today cannot understand the thinking and actions of their parents. Many bright young people never got the chance to go on to college and further their education. I pray that we never have to live through another depression as bad as the thirties.

It was 1936 and Franklin P. Roosevelt was the president. People were once more working and. prosperity and hope for a bright future was becoming a reality. Abe was working as a foreman on a large factory being built in North Philadelphia. All my daughters were working in offices and once again we could afford the luxury of driving about in our car and taking small trips and vacations. Gertrude was a popular girl and she was dating a young lawyer by the name of Louis Sherman. Louis was interested in and active in politics.

Through a conversation with me he found out that I was not a citizen because a law had been passed that stated that any wife of a citizen after the year of 1922 when the husband obtained his citizenship the wife was not automatically made a citizen. She had. to obtain her own papers and pass the examination. Abe had gotten his citizen­ship in the year of 1923. Louis urged me to go to school improve my reading and writing and learn the necessary answers to the questions. He told me that the Clara Barton public school just two blocks from my house had an afternoon class three times a week on citizenship. Louis said,
“Mrs. Benn I want you to become a citizen as I think you will benefit by it and furthermore I will be soliciting your vote when I run for public office.”

The very next week I stopped in to see the principal of the school and he took me to meet Mrs. Wilson, the teacher who taught the citizenship class. I was surprised to see so many men and women of all ages in the classroom. Mrs. Wilson enrolled me in the class and then introduced me to the students. She told me to take any vacant seat and said,
“Mrs. Benn, we are very informal in this classroom and anytime you feel you need help or wish to speak out on any subject just raise your hand.”

I never dreamed that going to school could be so much fun and so interesting. My classmates came from almost every country in Europe. Some had lived in this country a number of years, the same as me, while others were new immigrants. Mrs. Wilson was an excellent teacher. Not only did she help each of us learn to read and write quickly but she also had a knack of bringing history alive.


We discussed current events and she made each of us get up and talk in front of the class. I wish I had a recording of some of those recitations. They would have made good comedy recordings. I often wondered how Mrs. Wilson kept a straight face. Around the supper table I use to talk about the different classmates, the subjects we were studying, and especially about the field trips we took to all those historical places of interest. Abe use to kid me and say,
“Etta, you are having such a good time that I think you will be wanting to go on to high school and. then college”.

Louis use to quiz me on the makeup of our government and he said,
“Mrs. Benn, I think you would make a good lawyer.”

I even made a few new friends who came calling after school. After a few months Mrs. Wilson said that she thought that I was well prepared to take the examination for my citizenship. My daughters volunteered to take the day off from work and come to the courthouse with me.

I felt that they might make me too nervous as they watched me so I said, it wasn’t necessary to lose a day’s pay. I would have my neighbors come with me and act as my witnesses.
I dressed with extreme care that day. My daughters and husband wished me good luck as they went off to work. My neighbors arrived to take me into town promptly at 9:00 o’clock. There were about fifty people in the courtroom. Then the Judge came in we all stood up and then saluted the flag and pledged allegiance to the United States of America. The Judge made a speech about the opportunities open to all new citizens of the U.S.A. and also the duties and responsibilities towards the government by the new citizen

We were called in alphabetical order and I was the third person to be called. I was given a page to read and I recognized it as part of the Declaration of Independence. Although I was nervous, I had no trouble reading. I was also asked a few questions about the history and make up of our government and thank goodness I knew all of the answers and answered without hesitation. I was asked to sign my name and in a few minutes the examination was over and I was now a citizen. After all the people were called, the Judge congratulated us and we sang the Star Spangled Banner. That concluded the ceremonies.

I invited my neighbors who accompanied me and acted as my witnesses to lunch. After lunch I was ready to take the trolley home, but my neighbors said that they wanted to stay in town and shop for awhile. I wanted to be polite so I went along with them. In the late afternoon they finally said they were ready to go home. When we got to my house they said goodbye and walked on. I opened the front door and walked into the house and was I surprised. The house was full of people and my daughters had decorated the living room with red, white and blue crepe paper and small American flags. There was a large cake with an American flag and my name written on it with the word congratulations. The table was laden with all sorts of food and a large bowl of punch was on the serving table. I found out later that my husband and my daughters came home early from work to prepare the party and had prearranged with my neighbors to keep me out late. More neighbors kept coming in and the ladies who acted as my witnesses came in with their husbands.

We all started to eat and drink and then someone offered a toast to me. Then my neighbors started to call, speech! speech!


As I rose, I felt myself blushing. My heart was full of happiness at being surrounded by my family and friends on this momentous occasion. I had no idea what I was going to say but the words just poured forth from my heart.
I said,

“I have never made a speech before except in front of my classmates.
I came to this country in 1907 planning to earn enough money in
two or three years to enable me to return to Russia with enough money to pay for my dowry and to buy gifts for my family and friends. Destiny had other plans for me.

I never found the gold I came to seek. Instead I found the love of a husband, children and made many good friendships. More precious than gold, I found a government that gave me the right to worship God in my own way without the fear of punishment. I found the freedom to seek work and travel in this country without having to obtain permission from a government official. I found the opportunity of having my children educated in a free public school and of having that privilege extended to me. Now I also have the privilege of voting for the men and women who make the laws and administer the business of running this huge government.

I pray to God that this nation will always have a government that stands for liberty and justice for all. I am very proud and. happy to be a citizen of the United States of America.”




FAMILY HISTORY RELATED BY GREAT AUNT MARY

by Gailya Joan Paliga

Gailya and Marion Shulkin about 1980

Between 1825 and 1855, Nicholas I was the Czar. He was a cruel, brutal man who was also anti-semitic. This was especially upsetting to my ancestors because they were Jewish. This savage Czar censored the Jewish texts and newspapers, and restricted the subjects taught in Jewish schools. Worst of all, boys between the ages of twelve and twenty five had to serve in the Russian army for twenty five years. Christian training was forced on Jewish men in the army, and those who refused were beaten, tor­tured, or even killed. Thus, many males maimed themselves to escape the service.

The next Czar was Alexander II. He was “kindlier” (or as kind as a heartless Russian czar can get) to the Jews. A few were actually permitted to travel and some taxes were eased. Life for the Jews was bearable, but justice still wasn’t what it should have been.

Just as these peasants began to see a light at the end of a long, dark tunnel, a new czar came along, Alexander III. This tyrant was in power from 1881 to 1894 and he per­secuted the Jews as Nicholas I had.


LIFE IN RUSSIA

In 1905, a revolution failed and many of the Jews want­ed to escape to America. The Russian Revolution wasn’t the only reason Jews wanted to leave; my family left Russia because of the Dnieper River which overflowed its’ banks
each year. This caused my aunt’s great grandfather a lot of hardship because it overflowed onto his property (which included a flour mill and a lumber yard). The family lived fifty miles east of Kiev, but only one half block from the Dnieper River. Aunt Mary says she remembers walking to the river with her grandmother to wash the clothes. They always brought a little bread with some butter to keep my aunt from getting restless.
One year, the Dnieper River overflowed once too often. My great great great grandfather’s house was flooded, and a few weeks later the family had to float over in a small boat to pick up what was left of his belongings. My great grandfather, Jacob, said that enough was enough. That they were going to America because he couldn’t stand this life anymore. Most importantly, he wanted his children to have a better life than they had in Russia.
The children always came first. Their well being was always of paramount concern. Members of the family always thought about each other; never about themselves. Selflessness must have been a family trait.
Aunt Mary never thought of herself as being persecuted in Russia, although most Jews could not go to school. The only way for a Jew to gain an education was through bribery. Mary s aunts did go to school because they had money.

The oldest person my Aunt Mary remembers is her great grandfather. He died when she was eight years old (and already living in America). He must have loved his great grandchildren and grandchildren very much; he always made a big fuss over them. She loved him, also. His name was Samuel Byelacherkovski. Byela means white and Cherkovski means church. According to sources who knew our family in Russia, our name was respected, and the family was a prom­inent one.

In 1905, Aunt Mary’s father, Jacob, emigrated to America, alone. It was a grave occasion because it was felt that when someone left for America, they would never be seen again. (This was the truth, too, because all the relatives who remained in Russia were killed in 1916 or 1919. They were persecuted because of their religion.)

Since only one ticket ‘to America could be afforded, Jacob had to work very hard when he finally reached Milwau­kee to earn enough money to send for his family. He worked as a peddler/salesman selling dress goods door to door. Even though he probably didn’t eat half the time after only nine months he had earned enough money to buy four more boat tickets.

Meanwhile, back in Russia, Great Aunt Mary’s family was left with little money and no income. They were even­tually evicted from their primitive house. For their last few weeks in Russia, the family had to live in their grand­father’s house. As a result, she doesn’t remember what her house looked like, only her grandfather’s.

Finally one day, the boat tickets-came. On the day they were supposed to leave, all the aunts and uncles and cousins came to say goodbye. Everyone was sad and crying.

They hugged the children and made the biggest fuss ever. This was because Aunt Mary and her brothers were the only great grandchildren and grandchildren her relatives had, and now they were leaving.

They loaded their bundles of clothing, bedding, can­dlesticks, etc. onto a wagon and left Russia never to re­turn. Aunt Mary said she will never forget her departure as long as she lives.

There was a man driving this wagon who was part of an underground railroad. It was his job to sneak peo­ple across the Russian’ border. The horse and wagon ride seemed endless to my great aunt. It stopped once to pick up more people, and then traveled on for another couple of days. The next step was actually crossing the border. The people were instructed that that night they would have to travel silently, so they wouldn’t be caught. Aunt Mary and her brother, Joe, each held a side of their mother’s skirt. My great grandmother held the nine month old baby, Izzy, and they walked and walked ”forever“ in silence. Sometimes, she said, they had to squat down and stay very still. They finally made it through to the other side where another wagon was waiting to take them to a boat. Aunt Mary remembers it as an “eternity” to reach that final destination.
Even though her family and all the other immigrant families were in the lowest class (steerage), my aunt has pleasant memories of the luxurious boat. She also remem­bers some women who gave her some food when she wandered up to their wealthy deck. She said she took it to her mother (who was seasick the whole trip) and watched her as she relished the food like nothing Mary had ever seen be­fore.
Unfortunately, my aunt never knew there was a Statue of Liberty, even when she came into the New York harbor. To Great Aunt Mary, Ellis Island was gigantic, but she was never scared because she had her mother. Their name was changed to Weiss, because Byela of Byelacherchovskty means the same thing ,white. It didn’t matter to her family that their name was changed, though, because they had such ill feelings toward Russia.

A NEW LIFE
Starting a new life in a foreign country wasn’t easy. My aunt and her reunited family lived with a relative for a few weeks on Roosevelt Street (in Milwaukee). America seemed so advanced to my aunt even though her first place of residency didn’t have plumbing or electricity. She was dumbfounded when she first saw a streetcar.
“How could it move without any horses pulling it?” The concept of a streetcar was incomprehensible to her.

Day to day life was never easy for my family. Al­though it took Aunt Mary and her younger brother, Joe, about six months to pick up the English languages it took their parents years. It was also hard to get used to the “American Way.” (The first time my aunt was given a banana, she started to eat it with the peel on.) The only two as­pects of life that didn’t change were the mutual respect and love within the family and the hard work.

My grandmother, Ethel, who was born a year after Aunt Mary and her family arrived in this country, tells that she never had a mother at home. Her mother left right af­ter breakfast and returned in time to make the evening meal. She, like her husband, was a peddler. The money earned was divided into two categories: money for the children and money for food. My great grandparents gave every­thing to their “kinder” and kept nothing for themselves.

Education and a better life were always stressed, Perhaps these reasons accounted for the success of all four children. Aunt Mary, the eldest, married Joe Shulkin (a pharmacist) when she was twenty one. Her brother Joe be­came a dentist, Izzy went into real estate; and little Ethel became a kindergarten teacher. (This was an extra special feat, because most women didn’t go to college.)

The most poignant aspect of my relatives’ success was the fact that they always took care of their parents and each other. When my great aunt worked, she sent home most of her paycheck. When my grandmother couldn’t work (for medical reasons), my uncle Izzy made sure she had three dollars each week to buy those “special things .“ Grandma says, “Izzy must have had to work extra long and hard to earn enough money to share with me.” There was always enough money for education, no matter what the parents had to live without. It was a continuous circle of giving; each person contributed to another’s best interest without ever thinking twice. That is remarkable!

If my relatives hadn’t had the courage to seek a better life in America, my family would have died out forever. Unfortunately, because of persecution, many families did. Emigration and the commencement of fresh lives may have been difficult, but it wasn’t uncommon.

What makes my relatives special is their gift for car­ing and sharing. Their achievement level has always been high, and hopefully always will be.






Genealogy
of the
BYELACHERKOVSKY/BARONOFSKY/CHUDAROFSKY FAMILY

G0.0 Smelig Byelacherkevski (Samuel) b. 1825 married Freda Minna (Mani) Chudarofsky. He owned fruit boats on the Dniper River and a grain mill. ph)
1.1 Morris (Moishe) Byelacherkovsky b. +/- 1870 married Reva, emigrated to Milwaukee 1902
2.1 Meyer Weis married Emma
3.1 Mona Weis b. about 1917
3.2 Donald Weis b. about 1919 occ.: movie director (divorced and remarried)
4.1 Debbie
4.2 Pamela
2.2 Sophie Avner
3.1 Shirley Avner

1.2 Joseph Byelacherkovsky
2.1 ???????? , who married Nachama Wolinsky
3.1 Mani
3.2 Elusha
3.3 Yankel (Jacob)
3.4 Itzi (Israel)
1.3 David Byelacherkovsky b 1852-1916 in a pogrom. Lived in Kaniev, Ukraine married his first cousin Reva (Rachel) Chudarofskywho died and he remarried Ethel. Occ: accountant/cashier in a lumber mill.
Kaniev is a small town near Kiev (beyond the pale where Jews were allowed to live as they were forbidden to live in large cities such as Kiev). It is near Chernobel where the nuclear energy plant melted down contaminating residents and near Babi Yar where the Nazis machine gunned down the Jews of Kiev and vicinity into a ravine in 1942. A yahrzeit list of the area lists several Byelacherkevsky's among the victims. (The name Belaya Cherkov translated means White Church but Jews called it Black Church because of the rampant antisemitism there during czarist Russia)
Some of the Chudarofsky family emigrated to Philadelphia and changed their name to Ivker. Milton Ivker was a Phildelphia urologist in the 1960's. He had children Richard Ivker and Sharon.
G2.1 Jacob Weiss b 8/4/77-1957 Immigrated in 1907 emigrated through the port of Philadelphia. married Dora Wolinsky (Dvossi).
Nahama Wolinski Byelocherkovskyintroduced her brother in law Jacob to her sister Dora. Dora’s mother was Haddasah (Edasi/Esther) Baronofsky from Berezevka (Bareschov?) Hadassah married Joseph Wolinski, who died young of tuberculosis. Hadassah’s sister, Merka Green, raised Dora after Hadassah was killed in a fire.
Dora’s sisters did not emigrate. One was Risi (Riva), who married Israel Garelikoff, and divorced him. They had three children, two of whom were Jacob and Emma Garelikoff. Another was Nachama whose sons were Itzi, Jacob, and Elusha and daughter Mani. The third sister was Feige who married Rabbi Balzac who died between 1925 and 1930. Their children were Schmuel (Samuel), Sadie, who married Morris Shane and had a son, Samuel, William who lived in Chicago and who had a daughter named Florence, and Mary Rudolph who had a son named David Rudolph who also lived in Chicago during the 1950’s.
Aaron (Wolinski) Wolens, Dora’s brother? emigrated in 1899. He visited the family in Milwaukee in 1917. He was a long bearded, well groomed, well spoken man who had 7 children, six sons and a daughter. One son died of appendicitis and another had drowned. Aaron lived in Sasketoon, Sasketchewan, Canada. His daughter, Sonya, married a man named Lyons and their daughter was Mona Freeman. A son Leo had a daughter Mimi, who married a Dr. Brown and lived in N.Y or N.J. Aaron’ sons were Mo (who married Eva Stein) and Leo (who married Mimi Brown) all of whom lived in Los Angeles.
When Jacob came to Ellis Island he gave his name as Weiss, rather than Byelacherkevski since his cousin Meyer Weis who immigrated earlier could not spell Byelacherkevski so he translated and shortened the Russian (White Church) to Yiddish for white.
As was the frequent custom, Dora and the children followed Jacob to America several years later after he had earned the money for their passage. That's why the old tin type family portraits had no men in them. They were taken to send to the US for the fathers to see the children's growth. Nowadays the same thing happens because the father is taking the picture.
Birthdates are far from exact because it was not a Jewish custom to celebrate birthdays and there were no birth certificates. Children's ages were calculated by whether they were born close to a holiday such as Pesach or Rosh Hashonah and often the year was not recorded. Keeping records made for problems with the government concerning taxes and conscription. Jacob once quipped that his accountant father, David Byelocherkovsky, was ambidextrous as he could keep books for his employer with one of his hands and books for the government with the other.
G 3.1 Marion (MIriam in Hebrew, Merka in Russian) Shulkin b. 11/10/1904 dec 1997.
Named after her aunt, Merka Wolinski, who raised Marion's mother, Dora, after Dora's mother was killed in a fire. She married Joseph Shulkin a pharmacist in 1924. A Chicago Rabbi, a Baronofsky cousin, performed the ceremony. An oldest child, Marion was a buffer for her parents (who didn't speak fluent English) to the New World. She was programmed early on to be a caretaker and was the matriarch for the Milwaukee extended family.
G4.1 Richard Shulkin b. 9/19/25 (Yidel David Baer after Edassi Wolinski, and his great grandfather David ) married Sydelle Landfield (who had been a Quiz kid on a radio show as a child.)
. G 5.1 Dara Aronoff 11/15/52 Named after Dora Weiss, married Michael Aronoff. She has 2 stepdaughters .
G5.2 Robert Shulkin (Shea Feible ) Named after his mother's side of the family,( differing from the custom of the first child being named after the mother's died since Dara was the first child born into the family after her great grandmother Dora's death and Sydelle honored the need to remember Dora). b. 5/30/55 married Mari Lou Herron. (Mari Lous's sister Shawna is the actress who played the mother on the Major Dad TV show.)
6.1 Emily, (named after Ethel Borkon)
b. 8/23/93
6.2Rebecca b. 3/7/95
6.3 Mallory (named after great grandmother Marion Shulkin) b. 5/30/19970
6.4 Sarah b. 10/27/2000

G5.3 James Shulkin b. 10/10/57 (Eliezer Itzhak- after his materal and paternal great grandfathers respectively. married Denise Cariski. Occ.: trained as avocational counselor, he's a health care company executive.
James was not circumcised in a ritual briss. Because there had been a deception in his brother Robert's briss, (Robert was mistakenly circumcised with the Gentile infants before his briss and the hospital planned to cover up the error by substituting another baby for him at Robert’s briss ceremony) the family got a ruling from Hassidic Rabbi Twerski that James could be circumcised by any Jewish Doctor who was of good character.
64.1 Jeremy Shulkin b. 12/10/84
6.2 Leanna b. 10/3/88
5.4 Lisa Sattell b. 12/1/58 (Masha Hinda, named Masha after Malach Shulkin, her paternal gr grandfather and Hinda after a friend, Fran Kessler’s relative since Fran had no children. married Michael Sattell. Lisa is a linguist, teaches English as a second language.
6.1 Jessica b 2/12/85
6.2 Martin Satell b 1/20/87
G4.2 Mark Weiss Shulkin b. 8/31/29 (Mayer Schmelig, named after each of his two great great grandfathers) married Sunny Edelman 7/11/54
Mark and Sunny renewed their marriage vows on Thanksgiving 1998 with granddaughter Jennifer as flower girl, grandson Daniel, the ring bearer who also gave away the bride, and grandson Benjamin who took time out from his Bar Mitzvah studies to officiate as the Rabbi.
G5.1 Nedra Jean Fetterman 5/21/55 ( Merka named after Merka Wolinski) Occ.: clinical psychologist , she married Joseph Fetterman.
6.1 Benjamin Fetterman b. 6/25/87
G5.2 David Jonathan Shulkin 6/22/59 (Malach Esser named after his two great Grandfathers) Married Merle Mindy Bari, a medical school classmate. Occ: physician and CEO of Beth Israel Hospital, NYC
6.1 Daniel Bari Shulkin b 1/24/90
6.2 Jennifer. b. 3/29/93
G3.2 Joseph Weiss b 12/28/04 dec Hodgkins Disease about 1959. Occ: dentist, married Bertha Chudakoff
G4.1 Daniel Weiss 9/19/ 1933, Occ: Attorney married Carol Peterson divorced and re-married to Rita.
5.1 Michael Daniel Weiss Occ.: real estate developer along with his brother David Jeffrey Weiss in Milwaukee.
5.2 David Jeffrey Weiss
5.3 Stephanie

G 4.2 Naomi Beller, Occ: teacher. married Herbert
Beller, an Architecht. They live in Yardley, Pa
5.1 Beth Ann b. 1962
5.2 Michael Jonathan Beller Occ.: electrical
engineer

5.3 Joshua David Beller b. 1969
G3.3 Ethel Borkon 12/ 20/ 09 - 1990. Occ.:Teacher, married Harry Borkon, a pharmacist, about 1935.
Ethel had to keep her marriage secret for many years because the Milwaukee School Board refused to employ married women during the depression because jobs were saved for others who did not have husbands to support them. Some thought the rule had to do with married women potentially transmitting carnal knowledge to the children.
G4.1 Rona Jean Elaine Gahr 12/ 30/1940 -(Riva (Ruth) Shoshana(Rose) Real estate agent. married Samuel Gahr b. 1928, a dentist
(Rona is the successor to Marion Shulkin as the Milwaukee family matriarch)
G5.1 Gailya Joan Paliga b 4/ /63 named after great grandfather Jacob Weiss, Occ.: Computer designer turned teacher of English as a second language. m. Robert Paliga, electrical engineer.
6.1 Elise Helen b 11/1/98 named after great grand parents Ethel and Harry Borkon and grandmother Helen Paliga
G 5.3 Steven Brian Gahr (named after his paternal grandmother) b. 1965, Occ.:Contract Manager at Quad Graphics Inc. m. Debra Ann Arnold
6.1 Julia Danielle b 1999 named after

Daniel Borkon 6.2 Jason Warren Gahr b. 2002

G5.2 Deborah Maxine ( after her paternal great grandfather Max Gahr and great grandmother Dora Weiss). b 1967 m. John M. Barrett, manager at Metavante
6.1 Rebecca Sydney b. 2000 (named after her grand aunt Rose Gahr Stein)
6.2 Mia Jollie named after Marion Shulkin b. 3/13/03
G. 4.2 Daniel Martin Borkon b. 4/ 16/ 43 (named after his grandmother Dora Weiss. dec 1998. Occ: Accountant. m. Susan Wernick 1968, divorced and remarried Diane Allschwang in 1987
G5.1 Laurie Borkon 1982
G5.2 Julie Meyers b 1984 (named after Jacob Weiss) m. David Myers
6.1 Ayai Daniel b. 2003 named after Daniel Borkon
6.2 Talia Rose b. April 2006
G3.4 Isadore Weiss, 6/10/06 married Esther Berlowitz. Occ.: boxing promoter, candle factory owner and real estate salesman.
The Berlowitzes were German Jews who had immigrated a generation earlier. German Jews were already middle class when the Russian Jews came..
G4.1 Benjamin Weiss, married Suzanne Harris. Occ: engineer turned real estate developer in Chicago .
5.1 Ellyn Elizabeth
5.2 Victoria
5.3 Eric Ross Weiss
G4.2 David Weiss married Sandy Stedman
5.1 Jeffrey Weiss
5.2 Stacy
G2.2 Evelyn married Joseph Cohen (or Kohn) killed by Cossacks in a pogrom in 1916.
G 3.1 Daughter
G 3.2 Kate
G 2.3 Mani dec 1917 in the Russian revoluton
G2.4 Ethel Zion (Zioncheck} b. 1885 married Isadore (Isaac) Zion
who came from Katerinslav about 50 miles from Kaniev.
They settled in Milwaukee where Isadore had been Jacob Weiss' partner in the furniture business. Isadore had a heart attack so he sought relief from harsh Wisconsin winters and moved to New Orleans where he had cousins. He opened a dry goods store.

3.1 Abraham Zion lived in New Orleans
4.1 Muriel
4.2 Sylvia Crosby
3.2 Samuel Zion lived in New Orleans
4.1 Daryl Zion
4.2 Herman Zion
3.3 Anna Bagelman (Bagelman's Department Store in Baton Rouge, La). 1910-1984 married Boris Bagelman
4.1 Paul Bagelman M.D. married Carol
5.1 Erin
5.2 Michael Bagelman lives in NYC
5.3 Jill
3.4 Larry Zion
4.1 Ricky Zion
4.2 Sharon Zindler b 9/22/46 married Sterling Zindler
5.1 Stephen Zindler b. 9/12/71
6.1 Jacob Zindler b.7/17/03
6.2 Allie Zindler b. 10/23/05
5.2 Scott Zindler b. 3/14/74
6.1 Haley Zindler b. 4/17/03
6.2 Ashely Zindler b. 2/22/05
G2.5 Etta Benn 1891--1980 (Yetta) married Abraham (Bendetsky) Benn. Their ship the Freizland arrived at the port of Philadelphia having sailed from Liverpool in 1907. If a ship sailed from Liverpool that usually meant that the immigrant left Russia legally, having paid any owed taxes and not dodging military conscription. But that was not the case for Etta and the Benn family who left clandestinely. Usually if leaving clandestinely, one traveled overland (at night} east to Germany where one got the ship to Ellis Island at Bremerhaven.
Abraham Benn was an established carpenter when Jacob Weiss arrived in 1907 but couldn't find work for his brother in law, who was too embarrassed to peddle fruit from a pushcart. so Jacob Weiss went to Milwaukee where his cousin Meyer Weiss was in the furniture business. Eventually Jacob became a junk peddler
Gertrude and Louis Sherman July 1954
G3.1 Gertrude Sherman, married Louis Sherman an attorney and Pa. State legislator.
4.1 Wiliam David Sherman b 1940 Occ: poet, writer
G3.2 Ethel Vinikoor b 1913 married Samuel Vinikoor an accountant
Ethyl and Sam Vinikoor in1954- Mina Benn and Danny Borkon at right center
4.1 Robert Vinikoor Occ.: immigration judge in Chicago, married Cheryl Rose
5.1 Michael Jeffrey Vinikoor
5.2 Jordan Andrew Vinikoor
4.2 Henry Morris Vinikoor b.1947 m. Gail Hershfield
5.1 Lisa b 1982
5.2 Julie b 1983
4.3 Nancy Heather Vinikoor b 1958 Occ: physician
G3.3 Freda Minnie (Mina) Benn (named after her aunt Mani) 1916 -2000 Occ.: administrative assistant Philadelphia Naval Shipyard.
G2.3 Edasi (Hadassah) married Josesph Wolinski, her first cousin (parents to Dora Weiss) died in a fire ..
Edasi was Yiddish for the Hebrew Haddassah. It was a family tradition to add "si" to all female names so Edass is Edassi and Dora or Devorah became Dvasi . Risa was Risi.

2.7 Rachel







Letters from Mina Benn

September 19, 1999
Dear Mark,
Thank you for your good wishes and your lovely letter. It was so nice of you to write to me. My phone # is (609)859-8057.

I was happy to hear that your grandson Ben made use of my book for his school project. From experience of so many people in my retirement home I have learned that children who have family support and loving parents become productive and happy people living fulfilling lives. It was great hearing about your family and I will add Jennifer and Danny’s names to the family tree.

I remember the summer you came to visit us. You were 17 and I was a lady of 31! I remembered what pleasure it was to show you around Atlantic City. You were such a enthusiastic boy- interested in all the sights and place I took you to. “Those were the days! “

Now about the Benn family. Ethel’s children are doing well in their careers and their children are growing up so fast. Henry’s oldest daughter (18 years) Lisa Vinikoor is entering her 2nd year at Hobart-Smith College in Geneva NY. This year she is teaching Hebrew at a synagogue near the college on Sunday mornings. She is getting $10.00 per hour and she is so happy to be earning her spending money. Henry’s younger daughter Julie (17) is a senior in high school and her brother Brian (12) just entered Middle School.

Robert’s three children Michael just finished his 2nd year at the U. of Illinois and he is taking his 3rd year at the University of Granada Spain. He is at this time interested in a medical career. His brother Jordan is a senior in H.S. and his sister Lindsay is entering H.S. They are all lovely children and I hope this world will give them the opportunity to live happy and successful lives.

I often think of you and Sunny and your children. I wish you lived close by so we could visit. I still drive but only to the supermarket, to doctors in my neighborhood and to Ethel’s place.

Again I wish you all the very best,

Love,
Mina

January 3, 2000

Dear Mark,
Let me take this opportunity to wish you and your family a healthy, happy New Year.
What I am about to tell you I know will sadden you—but don’t be—it’s a part of life.
My cancer, lymphoma of the throat has re-appeared. When one reaches old age I don’t believe in taking drastic treatments in order to prolong life. I am 84 years old and have had a long happy life. I was fortunate enough to have been born into a loving close knit family and have made many good friends in my life time. I have wonderful memories. The times I spent a few of my vacations in Milwaukee, the family was gracious to me and showed me such a good time. I remember you and your cousin (was his name Sam ?) taking me to the University of Wisconsin and trying to teach me how to play pool one night.
And the time you visited us and your wedding. Thank you for those memories.

I have been going through my albums and am enclosing a few pictures I think you would like to have.

My warmest regards to Sunny and your children.
Love,

MIna


January 11, 2000

Dear Mark,
The reason I am not calling you is because I lost my voice (not entirely) and am very hard to hear on the telephone. I have been through thru an operation, chemo and radiation three years ago and I don’t consider myself brave for not going thru that again. Anyhow the doctors tell me I might have another 3 or 4 months –and die in my sleep. I expect to continue living in my little house and if necessary just get nurses aids. Hostel care is not available in N.J. for me because you have to have someone living with you 24 hours per day. I regret that our family lives so far apart and the younger generation don’t know each other.

My sister Ethel Vinikoor has moved to an assisted living care center (very nice place)

Her address is One Brindenwood Dr., Voorhees N.J. 01043 Apt A211. Her phone # is 1-856-489-1932. My # is listed as F.M. Benn 1-609-859-8057.

My fondest regards to Sunny—May you both have good health and enjoy life for many years to come.
Love,

Mina

Glossary to Yiddish Expressions

YIddish is not any country's national language but developed during the middle ages when Jews wandered eastern Europe to escape persecution. It is a language of complaint and suffering with many words and phrases describing other people as good or bad. In this respect it is more expressive than the King’s English. When parents wanted to kvetch or insult someone they felt victimized by, they'd lapse into Yiddish supposedly to spare their childrens' tender ears.
Theoretically part of the tendency to see things as very good or very bad may have derived from study of the Torah which defines proper and improper behaviors.
Many of the terms below describe foods, cooking utensils, religious items or customs, body parts, or value judgments about behavior. . . Some Jewish words are more expressive than English and they filter into the English language. These are marked with an asteric.

THE LIST
Aff Kapuris- Literally the ritual of swinging a chicken over your head. - hopelessness, tragic outcomne
Alta Cocker- an old man
*Blintze- Jewish crepe suzette
*Bagel- a cement donut. (To keep your bagels safe put lox on them)
Ba’la bu’se --A matriarch who combines warmth with efficiency
Bankus- A heated cup applied to the skin over a painful area which created a vacuum as it cooled. A folk medicine remedy.
Batesum - testicles
Beitel- bye t'l- a small purse
*Borscht-- Soup made from cabbage, tomatoes, beets, often served at holidays. So popular in the Catskill Mountain Resorts that they are known as the Borscht Belt. Spinach and beet borscht are served cold. Most often eaten by elderly Ashkenazi Jews who slurp it noisily.
Bench licht- light the candles with prayer for the Sabbath
*Boychick- Boy'chick- pal (male gender)
*Bubbeh- a grandmother- A bubbeh mayseh is a grandmother story, not likely to be a true one
*Bub'kes- Trifles or nothing. (I worked hard and I got bubkes for it. )
Bulvan'- bully
*Cockamanie -ridiculous. Your son in law/s plan to invest in a new business venture.
*Chaim-- life-. L' chaim is a toast. Often seen on sweatshirts or beer mugs
Chale’ria- a derogatory term referring to a female business partner or a mother in law. YIddish equivalent of "bitch"
Chalkeh-- A matza ball served in chicken soup. Same as k'nadel.
Chanakuh Gelt-- money give to children as a Chanukah gift instead of the toy they would really want.
Chiss’el- pot or pan
Chas’an -Cha' san- Bride groom (chasene is a wedding)
Chozzer -Cha' zer- Literally a pig, idiomatically someone who is greedy or EATS LIKE A PIG.
*Che’der -- Hebrew School
Cho’chem --chaw' chem- Wise guy
*Chometz -Chaw' metz-- - Not kosher for Passover because its made with leavening or served on dishes that were not kept free of leavening and used only for Passover
*Chotch’kaleh a toy or trinket of little value
Chrawtzmir- Christmas
*Chu’pah - Wedding canopy or the tent one lives in on Purim
*Chutzpah Chu’ tzpah-- Nerve - guts. A guest at the Seder who brags about the food being better at his seders but never invites anyone to them
*Connip’tion (fit) a crazy, chaotic behaviour
*Dreck- Dirt, excreta, shoddy merchandise
Da’ven - - pray
Dre’hert- dray' ert- hell as in Gehen Drehert or go to hell
Essen, -to eat. {half of delicatessen.)
*Fancy-Schmancy- a rhyming second word starting with schm is a Jewish style of diminishing of the first word
Fa’gele- Fay' gel-eh- Literally a small bird- colloqually a homosexual.
*Farblunjet -Far blun' jet-- a blunderer, hasn't a clue, misinformed
*Farcock’ta - worse than farblunjet, silly, foolish (bahcockta) Yiddish for "shitty"
* Far shtunck' en e - smells bad
Feh- disgusting
Ferdreyt mir nisht mein kopf-- Literally don't turn my head around. Stop confusing me.
Fleyschig- a food or a meal including meat. Fleyshige meals must exclude milk products- perhaps from a Biblical phrase that one should not eat a lamb in its mother’s milk- perhaps because ancient Jews were too poor to be able to afford both milchigs and fleyschigs at a single meal,
Fressen - to eat fast like an animal as opposed to Essen, eating like a person
Fru’me - Pious
Gay in gesunt’er Health- go in good health or A be Gesund - as long as you are healthy
Gawt tzu Dank- God to thank, Thank God, in Hebrew its Ohev Shalom
Gournish helfen- Hopeless case, literally nothing helps
*Gon’iff -- Crook, Thief
Gree’be lah- fried chicken skin. Good for use as an artery hardener.
Ganz’e Knocker- The K is pronounced. A big shot, especially as he sees himself.
Gay aweck- literaly go away but in the sense of get out of here.
*Gefilte Fish -Gefil'te Fish-
Chopped fish balls. Congealed fish parts in a slimey jelly. Here is the recipe: 2 pounds boneless, skinless firm, white-fleshed freshwater fish such as whitefish, pike or carp2 medium or 1 very large onion3 eggs1 teaspoon kosher salt1/4 to 1/2 cup matzoh meal1 carrot, peeled and thinly slicedWash the fish and remove any scales. Grind fish and onions together (you can use a food processor, but make sure it doesn't get gluey). Add the eggs, salt and pepper and mix well. Gradually blend in enough matzah meal to just bind the fish mixture. It should have the consistency of raw hamburger -- not too soft or too firm.Add the sliced carrots to the strained stock. Adjustseasonings to taste. Bring the stock to a gentle simmer.Wet your hands with cold water and shape the fish mixture into egg-sized balls (they get bigger as they cook). Gently lower the balls into the stock (a long-handled slotted spoon works well here). Cover and simmer for about 1 hour.Let the gefilte fish cool in the stock until about room temperature. Put each gefilte fish on an appetizer plate and servewith horseradish. Serve cold.
Ge fish' te Matza- Broken up peices of matzah dipped in egg and fried
Gantze Geshichte the whole story- as in more than I needed to know about it.
* Gesund-- Healthy. Zei Gesund Stay well. Gesundheit- To your health.
Glaws- a glass for drinking
Glick- Luck
*Goy -gentile- Goyim -plural. Polite term for someone who doesn't enjoy a true bargain and who may have extra skin on his schmeckel.
Gut Yon’ tiv- goot yuntiv- Happy holiday (same as Yom Tov shalom) (Gut Yontiv Pontiv is a Christmas Greeting to the Pope.)
*Handel -Hahn' del- bargain or haggle over price.
Haredim- orthodox Jews, a term which includes those who follow a revered rabbi leader and those who do not.
Heis- hot
Hock mir nisht kein Cheinik-- Don't bend my ear, or don't talk endlessly about nothing. Literally a cheinik is a tea kettle and Hock is the verb -to knock. Imagine a teakettle boiling so much that its cover knocks up and down, loud and annoyingly from the escaping steam while its content gets less and less. It means that you don't have to shut up completely, just get to the point.
Hundt - dog - in the sense of less valuable than humans.
*Kaddish - prayer to commemorate the dead
Kalt- cold- Es iz Kalt affen Gas - It's cold outside
kimmel- Caraway seeds as Rye Bread mit Kimmel
Kref’tig- hearty food-Good for what ails you.
*Kee’ster- buttocks with a negative implication
*Ku’gel--- overcooked pudding usually with raisins and curds of cheese. - Lukshen (noodle) kugel is a side dish with the meal. Apple kugel is a dessert.
*K'nadel-- Pronounce the K. a matza ball
Kreplach, a doughy food-Meat boiled with a covering of dough like wontons in China or ravioli in Italy.
Recipe for Matza Balls, the most popular kreplach,:1/2 lb stale white bread (or use matza meal)1 C milk, warmed1 T cooking oil1 medium onion, chopped3 eggs1/2 t salt1/4 t white pepper1/8 t nutmeg3 T chopped parsleyBreak bread into small pieces; place in a medium bowl and pour milk over. Saute’ onion in oil till brown. Combine bread, onion andremaining ingredients; blend well. Mixture should be stiff -- addmore milk or bread to adjust consistency. Working with flouredhands, form mixture into a roll about 2-1/2 inches wide. Cut rollinto 8 pieces and form each into a dumpling. Boil dumplings inwater, being careful not to overcrowd the pot. Do not cover.Simmer over low heat about 15 minutes.
Goy' she Kopf- literally a gentile head - lacking Sachel or cleverness.
Kich’el- a pastry
*Kish’ke -A sausage made of flour, fat, onion, seasoning, boiled and then roasted cripy brown, usually sliced. A Jewish Kielbasi. In English vernacular it means "gut'" like I felt that shock in my kishke or he hit me with his fist right in the kishke.
Kishke gelt- Literally guts money- earned at the cost of sacrificing one’s very survival, so self sacrificing that it rips out one’s intestines..
*Kasha-- cooked cereal (tasteless)
Kina Hora -literally "no evil eye" . A gleeful expression of joysuch as when parents find out their daughter is going to marry a Jewish Surgeon.
*kiboo’dle – a mess, list of things (the whole kiboodle)
Knish- Pronounce the K. A pastry
. (Also slang an attractive woman or a female part.)
*Kosher- clean - certified as proper Jewish diet
Krank- Sick, Usual treatment is chicken soup or Jewish penicillin
Ka’shes- questions as the four questions asked by the youngest child at a seder.
*Kibitzer - A kibb' itz er meddles usually in a friendly way, a jokester.
Kish’nev- way out of town, not a good place to live or go. (actually a small town in Russia)
Knip’pel-- The k is pronounced. Mad money. what the wife saves for a rainy day without her husband knowing about it.
Ko’hanim Decendants of the preistly tribe of Israel, as opposed to commoners or Isrealites or the the Levies who are in between {in privileges during the synagogue service.}
*Kvell- feel pride, What the child's parents do when the child asks the questions well at the Passover seder. (especially if asked in Hebrew).
La Shanah Tovah- literally a pretty day. Example -on Rosh Hasshonah it means Happy New Year.



*Latke –Pancake as in potato latke
.
*Lox- smoked salmon - good with bagel and cream cheese.
*Mat’zah-- unleavened bread pressed into flat 8 inch squares perforated every quarter inch . Tastes like hemstiched cardboard.
*Mish’mash - mess
Me-chai’eh -- delicious -out of this world.:
Metze’eah - a bargain
Milchigs- Only dairy products- what may be eaten at a Kosher meal that excludes meat or within several hours of a meat meal.
*Mom’ser - plural is momse’rim -of illegitimate birth or a mean person. A more scholarly discussion is that illegitimacy in Jewish thinking differs from Christian concepts in that only if a married women gives birth to a child other than her husbands is the child illegitimate. The term doesn’t apply to the child of an unmarried mother.
The children of a momser are also momsers for seven generations and acoording to Jewish tradition can marry only other momserim or converts to Judaism. (Converts by the way can marry any Jew except Kohanim.) The tradition admonishes momserim to obey these rules rather than risk early death by Divine intervention.
Mychel- A particularly delicious dish, especially if prepared by someone who loves you.
Me gill’ah- -Literally a scroll from the Book of Esther- a long story. In usage, spare me the whole megillah
Meh shu' gan er- Crazy or foolish in a gentle or well meaning connotation
*Mezu'zah - A small cylinder containing a scroll of Deuteronomy attached to the right hand door post in Jewish homes declaring the existence and omnipotence of one God.
*Meh zu’ma - Money- more often spoken of as Gelt.
*Mav’in - A self proclaimed expert who knows where anything can be bought wholesale. Sometimes used as a compliment but at times denoting someone who mistakenly gets poor quality (Schlocht) or who overpays.
*Maz’el Tov - literally happy or lucky day. Example when a child is born or one gets a promotion.
Mess’er - knife
*Mitz’vah-- A good deed- done for one's own sake rather than as a tribute to God, who Jewish tradition says need no help from humans in doing good works.
*Moe’l- Does ritual circumcisions
Nisht Gefahr’lich--- Literally not dangerous. figuratively nothing to worry about. Describes a person without power.
* Nach' has - A sense of joy one gets from the success of one's child as opposed to Yich' as, the joy one gets from family accomplishments or one's pedigree.
Naf’keh- a woman of ill repute. Also known as a Koor’veh, a reference to the Russian Czar's wife at the turn of the 20th century or to the flashy shiksa your nephew married.
Narr’isch - foolish
*Nosh’er--- Person who eats between meals rather than having a larger meal. Jewish tradition is that if it rains on your wedding day you become a nosher.
*Nudge- pest, a nag
*Nudnick--someone who demonstrates more limited intelligence than one would expect of him. A dope.
*Nebbish- a Milquetoast - The person you always forget to introduce, will never amount to a hill of beans
*Oi Veh-- Literally Oh Trouble. Depending on the emphasis on the Oi or the veh- can mean My God!, Look out, What grief, etc.
Pay' iss- sideburns. Hairstyle for Orthodox males. Othodox women wear a She’tle or wig.
*Patsch- Spank , a mild slap
Patsch aff dem tuchas. A mother’s gift to a child needing discipline. Less painful than a Zetz in dem punim or a hard slap in the face.
*Pawtz- Worse than a jerk -also a male sex organ
Petzl- small Pawtz
*Parve- Neutral,- neither meat nor dairy so it can be eaten at any meal. Examples are vegetables and fish
Pish’er ke- a person who is small in social status and therefore ineffective.
Pi’pic belly button
Pisk- mouth
*Plotz- faint. What you'd do if informed you won the state lottery
Pol’ke- Drumstick, whether referring to humans or to roast chickens -a thigh
Pun’im - face
Pus’chke- A can, used as a bank to save for giving to charity
*Rab’bitsen - the Rabbi's spouse
Shay’ne Ma’del - Pretty girl
Schmeiss- fornicate
*Schnaps- Whisky
*Schnorrer- Beggar, cheapskate. Comes to your seder every year but never invites anyone to his house for dinner.
*Snozzola - nose
*Schlacht-- cheap merchandise
*Schlecht- bad
*Schle meil- dumbell - has a talent for failure
*Schlemaz’el - Jinxed - doomed to be victimized The one who the Schlemiel spills hot soup on.
*Schlepper - No value except to lug or carry items to another place or to chauffer people from one place to another. The connotation is that the schlepper dislikes the chore, does it slowly or with some difficulty.
Schlong- Male organ of regeneration
*Schmerz- pain
*Schmuck-- Jerk, easily influenced
Schmutz- dirt Schmutzig-dirty
Schtupp- fornicate
*Schul- school, temple
Schvitz- sweat, or a spa for taking a steam bath
*Spiel (shpe' el- } a rehearsed speech used repetitively to get a questionable point across.
Sachel- common sense or clever
*Shiksa - A Gentile girl
*Shagetz- A Gentile boy
*Shma’atte- A house dress. Clothes one wears when no body else is home, a rag
Shpil’kes- literally the urge to evacuate loose bowels, used in the sense of anticipatory anxiety or dread.
Sha’bos Goy- a Gentile who turns lights on or off on the Sabbath
Shach’ten -A marriage broker
*Sha’mus-- Sexton of the synagogue (Schul) In English slang -a private detective.
Sha’chet -Shay' chet- Ritual slaughterer of animals to render them kosher
*Schmalz- Fat - schmalz herrng is a herring prepared with chicken fat. In common English usage it means "laying it on thick", melodrammatized, gooey praise.
Schik’er -A person who drinks too much. Chronic Alcoholic
*Schlawb- a bum , a man without class or potential
Schmeck- Smell, A schmecker is a nose
schneck- glazed pastry perhaps with jelly inside
schmendrick -a man who messes up frequently and feels miserable. Every family has one. Sometimes confused with schlomazel or schlemeil.
Strudel, apple Chopped apples wrapped in dough

* Schmooze- to talk lightheartedly - about nothing very important
*Schnaps- Whiskey
*Shtick-- literally stick. A piece of dialogue. A pre-hearsed line or speech used to influence or entertain.
Shet’el- the wig orthodox women wear
Shtreimel - the fur hat that orthodox Jews wear on holidays.
*Stetl- small town in Europe where Jews were allowed to reside instead of in cities. The Russian plan was for them to be farmers rather than to take jobs from Russians.
Schvanz- male organ of regeneration
Shviger - ones mother-in-law, not in a complementary tone. (Another mouth to heed)
Shver- Father-in law. (The richer the shver the more beautiful the bride) The Shviger and the Shver constitute the Mah'ha’tun'em or the in laws They are Tzu' gekommeners. in that they came to the family instead of having the validity of being born into it.
*Seder---Literally the order of things. Actually the family Passover feast on the first two nights of Passover (and the last night of Passover in some families) in which the children are told the story of the Jewish exodus from slavery in Egypt.
*Sha’bos- Saturday, Sabbath, Shabos by nacht is Friday night
Simcha- Joyous occasion in which one might say Mazel Tov
Tallas- Prayer shawl
Tatallah- endearing term for little man. May be belittling if used by women.
*Trafe- Not kosher at any time. From an animal that doesn't chew a cud or a fish without scales or one that is a bottom feeder.
Tzatz' ke le- Small trinket, sometimes the female breast
Toom’ler- (oo like in look) a yiddish commedian- Many famous commedians Danny Kaye, Billy Crystal got their start in the Borscht belt before going on to Hollywood.
*Tuchas- buttock
Tuchas affen tisch- literally put your buttocks on the table but actually means "prove it or let it go". (put your money where your mouth is)
Tushy- buttocks (baby talk)
Tush- buttocks (grown up talk)
*Tsermish’ed-- Mixed up, confused
Tsimmes-- Tzimm' es-- A side dish made of chopped vegetabless and wine, prepared for Pesach (Passover). Also meaning "big fuss" making a big tzimmes about nothing.
Tepel- small pot for cooking
*Tsor’res- Trouble. Jewish saying is that the supply always exceeds the demand. Example: daughter pregnant before marriage. Son loses job and moves back home. Major Tsorres, Daughter and baby move back home too.
Tzi-Tzi's -The fringe orthodox men wear at the waist
Tante- Aunt or a title for a friend of the family who was close to the children
Un ge stup’ped- Loaded. He has more money than one would need.
*Veh is mir-- Woe is me. Poor me. An anthem of true suffering.
Voos Machst du? Literally, what are you doing? How goes it? The usual response is "How do you think its going?” rather than “ Ganz Gut” or very well.
*Yar’melke- prayer hat
*Yahrzeit- Anniversary or year’s time
*Yenta- overtalkiative gossipy woman
Yeshiv’a buch’ar- Student in a rabbinical seminary
Zye’en shah- or Sein shah - be quiet or shut up.
*Zaftig - hefty, pleasingly plump
Zay’de- a grandfather-
Zu Gekom’mener- an inlaw- not related by blood- came to the family such as one’s husband or wife
1984

Front: Sydelle Shulkin, Rona Gahr, Ethel Borkon, Marion Shulkin Dara Aronoff.
Back: Louis Sherman, Gertrude Sherman, David Shulkin, Ethel Viniloor, Samuel Gahr, Mina Benn, Samuel Vinikoor, James Shulkin. Richard Shulkin and Daniel Borkon.